to say I needed tampons?

[MakeYerOwnDamnDinner]

Eek, please be gentle, as I have been worrying myself sick over this.

Scenario is: I have been expecting ds father to come and pick him up since lunchtime, and have waited in for him. My period has arrived sooner than expected and I need to buy tampons.

Ds father has still not arrived by 3.30 and the shops will close soon. So i say to ds we need to go to the shops. We will just have to leave a note on the door for your father, but I can't wait any longer.

Ds goes on and on 'we don't need to go, we went yesterday, what do we need e.c.t e.c.t'
He is eleven, and has been given age appropriate books on the 'facts of life'

In the end I say 'look, I've got my period and I have to buy tampons o.k.? He looks vaguely uncomfortable, but shuts up and gets in the car.

Now I'm really worried that that was completely innapropriate. What do you think?

yanbu that was fine

Not innapropriate at all IMO. It was an opportunity for him to learn some consideration, and to understand that sometimes things do not go according to plan.

YANBU. It's a biological fact.

fine - well done for being honest. The less you make it seem like a big secret to your ds the more likely he'll grow up an understanding young man.

YANBU. Absolutely fine. I would say the same to my DCs when they are of an age where they would understand.

Looks like it worked a treat as well, he got straight in the car. YANBU.

It's silly when people pussyfoot around it anyway (scuse pun). It's just like saying 'I have a cold I need tissues' or 'we need loo paper'.

yanbu that was totally fine

I remember my mum once explining to me and my younger btother that she gets a bit grumpy around this time because of her period - its important that boys understand some facts tampons are a fact of life and when hes a grown up man he might even buy them for his wife / gf

Thank you so much.

That's really put my mind at rest. Can be such a minefield this motherhood stuff eh.

YANBU, definitely. 11 year old girls start periods, so if he'd been female, you would have spoken about it long ago.

My just 12 year old DS1 knows all about periods and if I am upstairs and need a pad, I will shout for Ds1 to grab me one from the downstairs loo, he does it without embarrassment.

YANBU, boys need to know about periods and things anyway

totally ok

most of the time a little truth is what is needed

you are in charge, remember that

precisely shiney !

or "get in the car now"

or face consequences of laptop removal/playstation confiscation/bed at 6pm kinda stuff

LOL - I'm with Shiney & Anyfucker myself!!

However, YANBU because a) it worked! & b) that's what you needed! Oh & c) might make him a little less of a PITA next time you say you need to do something....

Oh & half way through I was thinking you were going to ask DS's Dad to bring you some... I'm still undecided if that would BU or not???

I'd probably have told DS to go and get them for me.

YANBU in the slightest darling.

Thanks again ladies.

The debating thing is a whole other issue. My son is a born negotiator I'm afraid.

I think perhaps I do need to be a bit more assertive sometimes.

Probably would have left ds in the house to wait for his dad if the shop hadnt been too far away?

chippingin - why would she be being unreasonable to ask her ex to bring some tampons?

more assertive ?

after choosing that username ??