To think DP should stay in so boiler could be repaired

[tinalane]

OK so for a while now our boiler hasn't been quite right. It starts up but can't light, it tries over & over again then eventually it starts ok.

All this means the central heating is cold to say the least.

Well I looked up & called some repair companies, but they only come out in the week.

I'm at work all week but DP is on one day in the week, but says they don't want to wait around all day waiting for repair people & that I have to find someone who will come out weekends.

Not only is that more expensive, but since DP has been back at work I've been freezing this holiday unless I stay in the one room in the house with its own fire.

If only DP would wait in ONE DAY we could have a nice warm house again, and now its snowing!!

brrrrrrr

How about he finds someone hwo comes out at weekends, since he doesn't want to wait in? Or someone who will give a precise time to come (if they y 3 pm he can do whatever he needs to do outside the house in the morning).

No, he's being bloody unreasonable. Oh poor him, having to sit in the house for ONE day out of his life, so that his family don't have to go cold. MY heart bleeds for him.

Is he this selfish in other areas?

What has he got to do that is more important?

They do at least specify am/pm don´t they?

Dp doesn't say what is more important, I didn't want to get into an argument about what is more important.

More selfish, yes I think so, see my huge new post about my relationship, this post got me thinking.

I am freezing here today. Just been out in the snow & it felt warmer!!!

I forgot to say I also have a medical reason why I might feel colder (am on warfarin).

I honestly called about 10 laces, but the only reasonable ones only do weekdays. I'll have to try some more.

What a selfish pig Tinalane ...... there's no question that boring though it might be, if one person in a relationship happens to be at home Mon to Fri for whatever reason, then occasional jobs like waiting around all day fall to them. It's not like it's every week FFS ! The best way to deal with it isn't to sit around moping and clock watching but to do something at home that needs doing that day, so you still feel ike you've achieved something even if you can't leave the house .... but I'm sure you know that already !

Most smaller firms will at least specify that they'll be there morning or afternoon and many are happy to work round the times you're not in, like school runs.

He's being a complete spoilt brat and but for the fact I suspect it wouldn't get done at all I agree that HE should be making the effing arrangements, to his arrogant and selfish satisfaction, not you.

Well the boiler finally gave out at the weekend. Dp wasn't happy natch, who would be.

So yesterday lunchtime I phoned around & got the best quote, surprisingly from the biggest name.

Am now waiting at home for the engineer to arrive & its freezing!

Is it wrong to wake at 5am and fantasize about a sexy engineer coming to sort met out? :D

Lets hope its all sorted soon!

SO you had to take a day off work so that he didn't have to wait in on his day off?

Just read you also have a medical condition too - your DP sounds so selfish, really he does. DO you not question his lack of consideration for his partner and children? Does he also put himself first?

Hope your engineer is a sexy one and he sweeps you off your feet.

Of course he should stay in and let you go to work

Thanks!

'Luckily' for me my work just started flexitime this year & I would have had 4 hours by the end of Jan to take off.

Also He earns more than me, so I don't mind that much.

Yes I do wonder about it. This morning I was boiling kettles for him to wash from upstairs & was told I wasn't boiling a whole kettle properly!

I did start a thread all about our relationship, the conclusions where that either we don't have a relationship, we need counselling or I should leave! Of course its not as bad as it sounds in posts, but still brrr!

The hardest thing is I said we'd go halves on the cost but its DP's birthday before payday this month & I really don't know how I can afford anything now, after Christmas as well. Oh dear!

DP is a sweetie really in many ways & I do love him.

I haven't seen your other threads tinalane, so just going on this one thread, one incident obviously doesn't giver me (or anyone) enough insight to judge you, your dp or your relationship really.

But moaning at you for not boiling his kettle properly is just rude. NOt "terrible" just a bit rude. If I'm doing a favour for DP and he moans then I'd say once to stop moaning and remind him I'm doing him a favour. If he does it still then I'd stop doing what I'm doing. Perhaps he is used to moaning and bossing you around so it has become the norm for him and he is not deliberatly being nasty, just fallen into a bad habit.

One thing I do find a little though... It sounds from your posts as though you and DP live together, right? So why do you need to "go halves" surely you have house/family money rather than your money and his money? I have heard some familys have seperate money for spending, but even then surely it should be a shared cost? Is he not planning on beenfiting from the heating/hot water the new boiler brings? Also, you just said he earns more than you.

Why does he behave like this? Him being a sweetie in many other ways would have to be something amazing for it to in any way compensate for selfish behavior like this.

STILL waiting here for BG.

The cold & sexual tension here are full on!!!

Called BG, they said engineer might not be here till this afternoon now.

Just called work, they said might not be worth me coming in the, so I'd have to make the time up somehow!

All this then I'll have to pay for it as well!

Hope he's worth it ;)

Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Freezing here still.

ST right out window!

Without being libelous, lets say the charge would be more than I thought & can't be done until tomorrow.

So anyone with a gas boiler problem call around.

So I had to take a day off, still not repaired, another company can do it but not until thursday cos three things need doing.

Oh dear. This is no fun, and VERY cold.

Sorry this must be really boring to everyone else, it's just I am REALLY FED UP.

Eating cold sandwiches from a very late lunch.
House freezing, no heating, no hot water, being overcharged, boiler still not repaired, had to take a day off work, on medication that's making me feel colder, and DP's birthday at end of month before payday & looking like I can't afford ANYTHING.

Either we are overcharged & its repaired tomorrow (probably), or we are slightly less overcharged & it can't be done until Thursday, DP has offered to take day off then if it has to be them.

Really fed up, cold, hungry, had enough of it all.

DP says we should just sell the house next week!

Can't wait for the future when all of this is sorted out.

My DPs a plumber and he can manage to give people times of when he'll arive, obviously some jobs run late, but if hes gonna be horrendously late he'll call the customer. Also BG are way expensive, and apparetnly use crappy boilers - get some quotes from smaller firms and ask for vaillant or worcester boiler. DPs doing loads of boiler changes this month!
You're bloke seems like a plank btw!

You should make out a nice birthday card to that selfish scumbag partner of yours saying:
"Happy Birthday darling. Your present this year was me sitting around the whole week waiting for the boiler repair man, losing my earnings, while you were enjoying time off."

'DP is a sweetie really in many ways'

Umm, reminds me of a boyfriend I had years ago.

He too, could be really, really nice and then have odd times where he was, frankly, horrible. I used to moan to my friend about it, until she pointed out the obvious:

'He can be really nice to you when he feels like it, because he always does what he wants. Sometimes he feels like being nice to you, sometimes he doesn't. You don't really matter to him. He's selfish.'

Just ask yourself, how many times has dp put himself out for you?
Done something nice for you that made his life a little harder?

I think if you can't afford anything for your partner's birthday after repairing the boiler, then tough on him.

It's just been Christmas, you've had an expensive repair bill, your partner seems to have his head up his.... & you're worrying about being unable to be even nicer to him?

Sorry if this seems harsh, but I think worrying about not being able to buy him a birthday present when he's as selfish as he seems to be, is odd.

Make him a cake or something instead. You're both grown ups & he should be able to deal with not getting a gift because of a perfectly valid reason.

Well things are looking very very slightly up.

Called around again & found someone who's known this model boiler for 10 yrs, thinks we prob don't need all three repairs, has the parts in the van, can visit tonight, and is slightly cheaper than the Bg boys.

I wonder if he's hunky as well!

Feeling warmer as I've been out in the snow, so anything feels warmer after that :D

Picking up Dp from work after that, so slightly more hopeful!

Uriel you made me thoughtful

Can't wait until all this is over & I can soak in a nice warm bath for an hour & forget everything!!!

Just a final update. all is well & warm indoors now.

Two very nice men from a local firm arrived who specialize in that model of boiler, and repaired it that same evening.

Of course now I have a whole day of worktime to make up, but still.

So the moral of the story is, it pays to phone around, then phone around AGAIN & find someone who knows what they are doing.

Thank you for all your support.