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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not take ds to disneyland

35 replies

scrummymum · 29/12/2009 14:43

My DD and my niece both have their birthdays 4 days apart in March and will be 6 and 5 respectively. I am hoping to take them to Disneyland Paris for their birthday as they are both completely obsessed with disney and princesses etc.

My DS has just turned two but is a little behind his peers. He only says a few words and although he is improving all the time, he has trouble understanding things and is being seen by a speech therapist etc at the moment. He likes to walk (although he has trouble walking as he is double jointed - hyperlaxity) but doesn't like to hold hands and wants to just run off where he wants.

I am considering leaving him at home with my parents. They have offered and he loves being with them as they do the childcare while I am at work.

My thoughts are that he just won't get what is going on, he won't be able to go on many of the things there and will spend much of his time sat in his pushchair. This won't be good for him and won't also be very good for the girls as either me or dh will have wait with ds while they go on the ride and they will have to hang around waiting for us to change ds etc. He is also a boy who likes a long nap in an afternoon (about 3 hours) but he never naps in his pram. He will just end up crabby.

It is also going to cost a lot more to take ds and if he isn't going to enjoy it, it seems like a bit of a waste of money.

My mum has said that they will do some nice things with him while we are away (only 2 nights) like visiting a farm as he loves animals.

AIBU not to take him.

OP posts:
said · 29/12/2009 14:44

No

forehead · 29/12/2009 14:46

No, he'll be fine with your parents.

HellBent · 29/12/2009 14:48

We went this year with DS 5 and DD 3 for her third birthday. I had no idea how full on it would be or how long the queues would be. If he won't mind staying at home with your parents I would leave him. Just make sure he gets to go when he's old enough it is fab!

ilove · 29/12/2009 14:48

No

HellBent · 29/12/2009 14:49

We went for 2 nights as well and I was exhausted myself!

oxocube · 29/12/2009 14:49

I'm surprised you're even asking! Obviously he will be much happier and you will be more relaxed if he stays with your parents

jasper · 29/12/2009 14:53

Are you serious?
Leave him with your parents!

PixieOnaChristmasTree · 29/12/2009 14:56

Definitely leave him with your parents - he'll have more fun with them and they'll be able to spoil him as only grandparents can whilst you're away.

It sounds like a really good deal for everybody!

truoddsox · 29/12/2009 15:02

Not at all. I wouldn't dream of taking a 2yo to disneyland. We went to a small theme park near us last summer with my parents and 2 teenage sisters, and took ds (then 15mo). It was a bit awkward as someone always had to stay off a ride, we had to search for toilets, sit in a cafe for ages to feed him etc. a 5 and 6yo will just want to be having fun, not waiting around for toddler-ish things to be done. he'll be fine, you can take him when he's bigger. have fun!

Original poster
scrummymum · 29/12/2009 15:03

I just feel a bit mean. It is a bit irrational as I know he won't even know where we have gone and will probably hate the waiting, the travelling etc.

I have heard about how full on it can be and on a selfish note, it will be easier with the girls as we won't need pushchairs, bibs, milk, nappy stops. They can also amuse themselves while we travel playing on their ds's, ds hates sitting and it was tiring keeping him amused on the plane when we went this year. We can all go on the rides and get around the park faster to make the most of everything.

I am a bit of a nightmare with keeping everybody the same. If I buy dd something, I get ds something too. I always said that I wouldn't go to disneyland until both dc's could enjoy it but as I am currently thinking of a 3rd, by the time all of them can enjoy it, dd will be so much older and although would still enjoy it, it wouldn't be as magical.

OP posts:
ijustwanttoaskaquestion · 29/12/2009 15:06

you are absolutely not being unreasonable - i wouldnt dream of taking a two year old to disney land if i could get away with it. You want to be able to enjoy it with your DD and DN, lucky girls - its great, but be prepared for the queues, another reason why it would be pants with a two year old. The only way i would even consider it would be with a nanny!! lol.

He will love being with nanny and grandad and you get to have some quality time with your DD - everyones a winner!

ijustwanttoaskaquestion · 29/12/2009 15:07

i do understand why you feel a bit mean, its only natural but please don't - he wouldnt enjoy it, not one tiny little bit - well maybe for about five minutes but after that it will be pants.

PixieOnaChristmasTree · 29/12/2009 15:10

He probably won't enjoy it though - I imagine that if you could ask him, he'd look at you with a teenage 'what on earth are you on about face' and say, "Mother, can't you see, I'd much rather go to a farm!". . .

Anyway, you can always bring him back mickey ears!

littledawleybaubles · 29/12/2009 15:14

I really understand where you are coming from - my eldest is a 5yr old boy followed by girls 3 and 10 months. I want to go to Disney this year as I think that DS would still enjoy it but I'm not sure I should take baby. I know that it makes sense and I know that she won't be aware but it still seems strange to do something lovely as a family without her.
Having said that, I'm sure I'll get over it and go without her, you should do the same

InMyLittleHead · 29/12/2009 15:18

YANBU, he'll probably have a much nicer time at your parents'

Original poster
scrummymum · 29/12/2009 22:35

littledawley you have just described exactly how i am feeling. It seems like we are doing a lovely family thing and he isn't involved.

Thanks for all the replies. I will leave him with my parents and try to feel less guilty about it.

OP posts:
pigletmania · 29/12/2009 22:54

Nope leave with parents and go and enjoy yourselves, no need to feel guilty

ChippingIn · 29/12/2009 23:01

I can understand that you feel you are leaving him out of a 'nice family thing', but really that's your 'guilt' to get over

He will have a much better time with the GP's.

Throughout their lives they will want/need different things at different times, I actually think it's a bad thing to teach them that when one gets something the other must too - life isn't like that. Of course you must treat them fairly, but that isn't always the same.

oliviasmama · 29/12/2009 23:08

Leave him where he'll enjoy it most....with your parents. Now if it were Florida for longer I'd be saying something else but it's only 2 nights apart.

gingernutlover · 30/12/2009 09:36

YANBU eurodisney is very full on and not much fun for a 2 year old in a buggy I'm sure.

Just wondering why it would cost lots extra if he came though? Under 4's go free on eurostar and get free meals if you pay for half board and they are free in hotels and the park. Has that changed since I went? Cos I was telling a friend last week, whoops!

blijemuts · 30/12/2009 10:11

Think you would do ALL parties a favour! Including your little man and you're parents. Go for it ,enjoy and leave your feelings of guilt firmly locked up somewhere.
MIL is threatning to take whole family to Disneyland next year.Really appreciate the offer but DD will be 13 and DS will be 10.Isn't that a bit 'old' to still enjoy Disneyland? Other grandchild will be 18mnths which might be a bit young? Wrong timing? Love MIL so don't want to upset her,but also don't want het to spend her money on something that might not be the right choice.

satc2bringiton · 30/12/2009 10:16

I would leave him too.

Take him when he's a bit older.

WorkingItOutAsIGo · 30/12/2009 10:21

Scrummy - YANBU but totally sensible.

But just one thing that hasn't been mentioned which is worth knowing about in case anyone else has this quandary is the baby swap at Disneyland. It means that when you have a child in a pushchair, you all queue together and then one adult goes on the ride with the older child, while the other adult waits with the pushchair. Then the waiting adult gets straight back onto the ride with the older child. So having a baby in a pushchair means the older child gets twice as many rides for the same queuing time!

My older DCs were very disappointed the third time we went and their younger brother was old enough to go on the rides as it meant they lost the baby swap....they kept trying to persuade me not to let him go on, the rotters! And then they started planning that we should take a doll in a pram with us...devious huh?

WorkingItOutAsIGo · 30/12/2009 10:23

Oh and blijemuts at 10 and 13 they will still love Disneyland but it will be a totally different experience: you can let them off the leash a bit and they can go and do all the big rides time and time again, while MIL can enjoy Peter Pan with the younger GC. And you can use the babyswap thing as well!

Took my 10 and 13 year old this summer and they absolutely loved it.

cupofteaplease · 30/12/2009 10:37

I took our girls aged 2 and 4 last month and dd2 was petrified when any characters came anywhere near her! She also couldn't go on a number of rides.

I have already decided to take dd1 back early in the New Year (I love Disney, so it's as much for me as anyone else ) and I will not be taking dd2 if dh can look after her.

YANBU

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