To scream at MIL?

[mumof2teenboys]

I've spent all morning getting everything ready for tomorrow. I'm sitting here feeling a little bit smug because for once, I'm slightly organised

My MIl has just turned up with some food she's made demanding it goes in the fridge when its cool. Firstly, I have NO room in the fridge, its full of lovely boozy things (and a lot of food)
Secondly, its some indian stuff that no-one eats (MIL is indian). Its for tomorrow, but we are having traditional chrimbo food so it won't go and isn't even wanted

So, I am being unreasonable? There is a shed load of history between us and she is bonkers. If I bake/cook/buy stuff for OH, she has to the same. Its like a fecking competition with her.

Tell her "sorry no room at the inn"

can you freeze it?

Stick the food in a big sealed tupperware box and put it outside, that will keep it cool enough.

Or put the booze outside overnight, the turn a radiator off in a downstairs loo to keep it in there when you're close to needing it.

Preparing food is a big thing for mothers - my parents still do a massive shop for the holidays even thought they eat every meal over Christmas with me or one of my brothers.

From your name, it might not be long until you're in the same position, wanting to 'do' something for Xmas at your DIL's.....

(And it takes 2 of you to make a competition )

Poor you. You just don't need this, particularly as things were going rather well!

Do you have a garage or other cool place you could put her food? I don't think food necessarily has to be kept quite as cool as it would be in a fridge, particularly as it's only overnight.

The delights you have in the fridge sound lovely BTW.

Tupperware box outside, def

Ahhhhhhhh! YABU. She has brought some food to share. She's contributing in the best way she knows. Give her a little fridge space. Put stuff outside. It's colds enough.

booze outside.....how gorgeous though indian food to pick at, i would LOVE it, but then im a heffa so love all foods in huge quantities!

You sound the bonkers one, not your MIL.

It's CHRISTMAS! Why are you being so difficult? It can't be that difficult to find some room in a fridge or juggle things around a bit.

I'm not difficult honestly, its just that she does this every year because she doesn't 'like' english food.

Up until 3 years ago, we used to have indian food every christmas but I put my foot down and she has been doing this ever since.

She is very difficult to get on with, she won't speak english in front of me, my kids or my parents. She talks to my OH in her own language and excludes all of us.

Btw we have been together for 10 years so its not like I'm new to her.

YANBU to feel like this if there's lot's of history betweeen you, but YABU if you don't give a little cos it's Christmas.
I have to see my inlaws Christmas day, Boxing day & the day after for a few hours. It would normaly drive me insane to have to go 3 days running, but it's Christmas and I know they mean well, FIL just forgets I'm 20 wks PG and get very tired, also full of a cold.
Put the boozy stuff outside the back door, family harmony is more inportant than getting trollied. Enjoy Christmas with no big dramas.

oh, so the food is for her? Fair enough. She doesn't like the type of food you cook, so she's bringing her own.

Re speaking english - can she speak english? It's not 'won't' rather than 'can't' then? If it's won't then your husband needs to act. If she won't speak english (but can) then he can answer her in english. That passes a clear message to her.

Also, why don't you get your husband to teach you the basics in her language? Might help you. And might make her decide to speak english - if the object of not is to exclude you, you speaking her language makes that pointless, doesn't it?

She's still your DH's mum though.

I once read on here - no man ever loved a woman more while she was running his mum down!

To be serious, though, you knew, presumably, you were marrying in to a family in which English wasn't the first language, so it seems unkind to take against her because of it.

Relax, remember you have your DH and DSs every day. Your MIL is here for a day or two, make it pleasant for her and you'll get that warm, worthy-person glow, if nothing else.

You might even enjoy Christmas more .

YANBU to feel like this if there's lot's of history betweeen you, but YABU if you don't give a little cos it's Christmas.
I have to see my inlaws Christmas day, Boxing day & the day after for a few hours. It would normaly drive me insane to have to go 3 days running, but it's Christmas and I know they mean well, FIL just forgets I'm 20 wks PG and get very tired, also full of a cold.
Put the boozy stuff outside the back door, family harmony is more inportant than getting trollied. Enjoy Christmas with no big dramas.

-Take food in.
-Smile
-Complement her on cooking.

Merry Christmas

Obviously, there is probably a lot of history that no one know about but, from what you have written here, YABVU!

Find a bit of space, its Christmas

You sound like my sil. Its just space in the fridge not your bed .

Make room at the inn/fridge - tis christmas you know

YABU. It is unreasonable for you to insist English-only food, any more than it would be unreasonable for her to insist Indian-only food.

Put the booze somewhere else cool and make room for it.

Whoever said you should ask DH to discourage non-English language discussions in front of you makes a fair point, also that you make an effort to learn some of her first language.

As you say, it's not as if this is a new relationship for you. That cuts both ways surely?

YANBU. Every DIL should scream at her MIL at least once per year. Helps to keep MILs in their rightful place.

Let the old hag put some of her stinky food in your icebox. You are NOT obligated to even taste any of it, though.

Do what I do with the (apparently endless supply of) mince pies I get from everyone related to me.

Be grateful, take them happily, shove them wherever they can't be seen.

Eat one if it makes'em happy.

bin the rest discreetly.

Sorted!

Yabu
youmarried your dh
you knew what his family was like? You have to accept their culture But when you go round hers take fish and chips just for you