To think this is the wrong way round...

[WinkyWinkola]

My dad is here for Christmas. I love my dad, he's great but he never offers to help out when he's here.

He's just chipped off upstairs for two hour nap leaving me to entertain the three kids. Hmm. We can't go out as there's ice everywhere.

When I'm a gp, I'll be ushering the parents of my gcs off for naps and rests at every opportunity when I'm staying. Or aibu?

yabu
when you are a gp you will probably also feel the need for a nap after spending time with your lovely gcs!
Did you invite him round to spend time with him or to have him there as a help to you?
relax, he's having a nap - he may come downstairs in a while and be all smiles and energy and then you can slip off and have a quiet few minutes while your children leap all over him!

"When I'm a gp, I'll be......"
well you like to think so, but maybe you'll also be worn out from a bit of socializing with 3 children and ready for an afternoon nap.
How old is he?

At least he's cleared off upstairs. FIL just sits awkwardly in the living room until someone brings him a cup of tea/revives the conversation he's just killed.

YABU I'm afraid - he is a guest in your house, and much as it would be nice for him to entertain the children, he is entitled to do as he likes. My parents both definatly need a sleep in the afternoon, both for the actual sleep, and to rest their backs/knees/hips

He's as fit as a fiddle! Strong as an ox! 68 years old and is always going on 10km walks every week with his University of the Third Age group.

And he only got up at 11am.

lol JustAnotherManicMummy!
My father naps while in the middle of playing with dcs and they have great fun making fun of his snoring!
My MIL likes to just observe from the sidelines if we see her, it's just the way she is! No point trying to change people once they're that age, just accept it and love their foibles!
OP - see it as a compliment that he feels so relaxed in your home!

Must be all those naps and lying-ins keeping him so fit

You just can't begrudge a 68 year old grandad an afternoon nap.
I don't expect he's used to being around the children quite so much is he? They can be quite draining for anyone.

I don't really mind. .

I'd just been fantasising about an hours kip with the baby this afternoon and he got in there first with his nap time announcement.

It'd be nice if he wanted to help, but he's a guest, an old man and he's done his childrearing!

So while it would be great if he WANTED to help, your entitlement is diddly-squat.

my father is younger than that and he naps frequently during the day. Don't forget that as you get older you often find it harder to sleep at night - my father tells me he often wakes during the early hours and then can't get back to sleep again for a couple of hours so resorts to reading in bed or sometimes gets up for a bit and then goes back to bed to snooze until about 10.30am.
I could never understand why he was still in bed if we went to stay with him but now I know and can forgive his lapses in consiousness during an afternoon being ridden around like a donkey by my boys!

consciousness, even

There's some right sanctimonious MNetters about, aren't there?

I think house guests should help out as much as possible, frankly. It's not fair to expect people, especially family, to do everything if you're staying with them. Everybody knows how hard parenting is and to have guests as well can take its toll.

What grim, me? I suppose it does read like that It's not meant that way, I am just of the school of "expect diddly squat and thou shalt not be disappointed". nobody has to do anything for you, and you have a better life if you don't get your hopes up.

Sanctimonious?
It'd be nice if a visiting pensioner helped out a bit by pottering about washing plates or making a cup of tea.
Maybe even sitting babysitting in the evening when the children are asleep - but not when they need 'entertaining'.

Well, I think that depends on the pensioner, doesn't it? You can't say pensioners are all enfeebled and incapable just because they're pensioners. That would be a stupid generalisation, wouldn't it?

My auntie is 71, quite well and strong, helps out massively when she (frequently) visits. She's a delight to have around sometimes because she's always willing and able. We're the same at hers - all muck in because I'd hate for our hosts to feel that they had to wait on us.

I think house guests should never ever sit on their arse if there's stuff to be done or unless they're absolutely told not to do anything. It's the height of rudeness and imo, the worst kind of house guest ever.

The op's dad sounds quite fit. Of course he's entitled to a nap but he should help out a bit too if he's up to it. But I don't know if the op's dad has helped out at all. Maybe that's why he's weary like any thirty something would be after time with littlelies.

I mean, my auntie is lovely anyway, whether she helps out or not. But it's so much easier to have her over because I know she's not going to watch me do all the work iyswim.

OP, perhaps you need to ask for help.

I didn't think I sounded sanctimonious. I'm just not bothered if people come to see us and don't run around doing stuff. Just having them visit is a help in itself as it's someone different for the dcs to chat and play with and makes a change from boring old mum and dad!
If they insist on making a cup of tea or whatever, then that's very nice, but I don't think that they ought to do it if they're guests in my home. I'd rather they felt at home and relaxed instead of feeling that they had to fulfil certain criteria in the helping out stakes.
Heqet's tip to simply not expect anything and then you won't be disappointed is sound advice IMO. Or, if your parents are like mine, just accept them for who they are as it makes life so much easier!

My Dad makes cups of tea, clears the table, but much more than that I think he would feel he is "inteferring".

Although he will wash up without being asked & has run the vacuum around when I get it out!

When my 60 year old dad came to stay to see my 3 week old dd, I asked him to take some washing upstairs as it was in the chair he normally sits in.

He rolled his eyes, took it upstairs, then said 'there was a dirty breakfast plate [which I'd forgotten to bring down] on your bed, but I left it up there...'.

He probably thinks, 'well, I've given the kids a nice treat coming to see them, long journey, I'll just have a nap now and feel satisfied I've done my bit to help out'.

I realized yesterday (having driven up to my parents' house with the Christmas joint, done some DIY, put up the Christmas tree and cooked the Sunday dinner), that my dad thinks I come to them 'for a rest'. Bless. Communicating about who's doing the work and who's being the guest is never going to be plain sailing.