In thinking that when I have put out ds' party invites and a note saying please rsvp either way ...

[bogie]

I have so far only had 1 reply..... I put the invites out over a week ago at the xmas play I saw everybody take them home, it had my email, phone number, a rsvp slip that could be put into ds' tray and a note saying please rsvp as I need exact numbers.

23 people have got invites and I have had just 1 fucking reply is it really that hard to let somone know if your coming to a party.... We have to pay £10 per child to come to this party and I don't know how many are coming, I need to know by this weekend, so aibu to go and stand outside the classroom for the day and stop every parent who goes in and ask them if they are coming or not?!?

The only way you are going to find out is if you accost every single parent and demand an answer there and then. I've learnt this the hard way.

yup. you have to ask them. Tell them that you have to know in order to book.

Anyone who doesn't let you know - don't book a place.

Probably best not to say it like that though

I had a big bash for my eldest. Only about half the invitees rsvp'd. Loads of people showed up who hadn't let me know.

fortunatly it wasn't a pay-per-person place, or they'd have been screwed!

You just need to speak to them.

YANBU - espeicially as you specified that it wasn't a 'regrets only'

I think it's so rude that people don't RSPV

I shall have to ask my mum if it was normal not too RSPV when i was at school but as far as I can recall i always got those little slips back (it being a time before texts and emails)

I too had a party last year for DS1 where I needed to know numbers before the event. I stopped and asked

Rude so and sos

I would say YABU to get so irate but YANBU to wait and ask them

YANBU to expect rsvps (very rude) and YABU to spend £230 on a kids party!!!

I would wait and ask them today at school.

IME this happens every year, so tbh now I only invite those children I know I can get hold of their parents to ask (either because I see them in the playgound or have a phone number for them).

There is usually a core group who never reply but always turn up. LOL They always look so surprised when you stop and ask them if there DC is coming or not. I think they think you are a mind reader! LOL

deaddei thats why I wanted replys because if only half the class can come it will be £110 where as if everyone is coming then it will be alot more!

Bogie I am in the same position, gave the invitations out last week and had very few responses, I need to know for definite by the weekend too. It is very annoying.

It is a joint party so the costs will be halved although we have invited all the class.

Ah got you op!!!
Hope you speak to the parents at home time tonight!

We have a class list which has all parents' emails, phone numbers etc on it, so I just tend to send out an email before the party (as a warning) and then if I need to chase anyone up.

As a final chase up I text the offending parent.

Usually manage to get everyone's replies that way, but it is tedious.

I have felt like thinking sod it they aren't coming, but then you just know they'll turn up and you'll look like a git.

I have just had an idea that would solve this problem for people!

If you put out the invitation, stating the date and time of the party, but saying that the location was a secret, to be disclosed nearer the time, then people would have to rsvp in order to find out where the party was - and people wouldn't be able to turn up without having rsvp'd.

Ooh that's a good idea!

YANBU, I have had to phone parents in the past, 2 days before the party, to find out if their little darling was coming or not. It doesn't matter what the venue is - even if you're having the party at home, it still costs more to have 10 children that it does to have 5.

SantasGirl's idea is brilliant and I might well use it next year!

Given that we live in a world that's obsessed with text messaging, RSVP-ing is a doddle. Takes 10 seconds and doesn't cost a thing.