to tell them I will not be paying for this until after xmas ??

[MrsMorgan]

In sept, dd1 joined a cheerleading squad. It is a big squad with a few different groups. They do lots of competitoins and have won lots of awards etc.

When she joined i knew she'd need a competition costume. They said it would be £60 and they'd say when we had to buy it.

I told dd she'd have to have it for her birthday at the beginning of Nov, and she was fine with that.

First week of Nov comes and goes with no mention of uniform and so I buy dd something else. Then all of a sudden i get an email saying the uniforms are now needed and they are £90 and have to be paid for by the end of Nov.

Tbh I ignored the email because I wasn't sue if i'd have the money or not. All of my dc's birthdays are Nov/dec and obviously xmas too. The coach has just emailed to remind me again and I have replied saying sorry but I won't be paying for the uniform before xmas, as although i knew it was needed, i expected more notice than 3 weeks.

AIBU or are they taking the piss ??

This is going to sound horrible, but if you can´t afford for your daughter to do it, you can´t and imo it would be better to tell her and let her find something that is affordable.

I do think that is a lot of money to find at once - can you offer a deposit now and the balance later. Does she have to do the comp this time ? Maybe she could continue to go as part of a group for now and commit to another one later on, allowing you time to save and her to learn more skills. Do they wear the same uniform for the next one ? Unfortunately like dance and gym the weekly fees aren't the end of it. Get her to ask xp too - can he contribute as a Christmas present.

I have spoken to dd this morning and explained the situation. Unfortunatly she is refusing to see my pov and insisting that she still wants to do it.

It is the only thing out of school that she does and i'd hate to take it away from her.

Dd could ask xp until the cows come home but he won't contribute as he has no money, but also won't look for a job.

As usual, in dd's eyes, I am the one to blame.

She is 12.

There is no other cheersquad in the local area, and my suggestions that we found a dance class were not appreciated.

Have also told dd2 that she will probably have to give up swimming, at least until I find a job. She is more understanding, but then she could rejoin that at any time. Dd1's cheersquad will not take her back once she leaves.

Does she have any savings ? Maybe Christmas or b'day money she could contribute or family members who could instead of gifts. tbh I think she's old enough to understand your predicament, even if she thinks it unfair.

Well if your other daughter might have to give up swimming, I don´t really understand why you are even entertaining the cheerleading idea,tbh.

If you can´t afford it, you have to tell her!

Well as I have already said, when I signed them up to this stuff I was £80 a month better off, but thanks to a twat of an xp, I am going to have to dissapoint them yet again.

Dd1 has agreed to see if we can find a cheaper activity.

Oh and dd2 was asked about giving up swimming, because she has started playing flute at school.