to be really annoyed about school Christmas plays

[bellissima]

...when they pester you to get a horribly complicated costume (god knows how working mothers cope), make them learn their lines every night (age 6), ration out the tickets and THEN, when inevitably some are ill (in DD's class's case quite a few with some horrible croupy cough thing) refuse to postpone the thing or at least do a rerun next week. DD devastated, insisting she can go in etc (she can't) and I'm CROSS. It's not just one or two inevitable absences but quite a few. grrr. end of rant.

My ds has a solo in the school carol concert on Monday. If he's ill that's just tough - he will be gutted , but them's the breaks - the show must go on etc etc etc!

Our school has 2 evening performances and no daytime ones and children under 5 are banned from both. This means that DP and I are having to go individually to the show on different nights because we have no family or friends round here who we can ask to babysit. I find this extremely annoying. Also, I think the lack of screaming infants, boisterous toddlers will ruin the atmosphere of the school play! I really don't understand why people think going to the school play is like some trip out to the opera that requires a silently reverent audience. Surely the real reason you're there is so that you're child can know you're there watching him/her?

The school have also sent home a letter asking who will be picking each child up on each night, but they've completely neglected to even give an estimation of the finish time. This doesn't matter so much since we have to go both nights, but it does mean that loads of parents who're going on the second night don't know when to turn up.

The same letter also bans photography and video cameras under the spurious cover of the data protection act. This is made all the more laughable by the fact that they are selling DVDs of the performance to make money. I think one of the secretaries just stuck something in about the data protection act (rather than, say, for child protection concerns, which would be entirely counteracted by selling DVDs of the performance anyway) to make it sound like an official reason. I'd much prefer that they stated the real reason, which is clearly that they want to raise some funds.

DS has to wear his dressing gown as a costume. They made him take it in last week and keep it in school, so he couldn't wear it at the weekend. That was slightly irksome too.

However, I do think the OP is BU about not changing the dates for illness. It's December, some of the children will inevitably always be ill. You just have to deal with it and wait for next year, I'm afraid.

I'm just crapping myself in case the costumes I was bullied persuaded to make look crappy and bits fall off

But YABU to think they should change the date. Half the population are ill this week - next week it'll be the other half

monkeyfeathers - people actually want to HEAR their children say/sing what they have been rehearsing so much.

Sorry- my DD is devastated she missed performing today as she has been struck down by tonsilitis. She has been practising for weeks, and was in tears for a large part of yesterday when she realised she wouldn't be going in today.

It is however unreasonable to expect the school to change it- she is one of nearly 500 children- and it is an important lesson for children to learn... the world is bigger than their own little life, and it keeps on turning without them. Most parents work- so should they disrupt 800 or so businesses too?

Wonderful that people are banned from videoing school plays - it means that the audience might actually get to see it without a wall of dads with big cameras standing between them and the stage!

And brilliant that they have performances without screaming brats - it is so depressing for the children to deliver lines that they know the audience can't hear! And so many parents don't have the basic manners to remove their noisy children out of respect for the performers.

ds's play was today. Plenty of babies, toddlers and little kids in the audience - yes, some of them were a bit noisy but that's the deal with a family event, isn't it?

Was v impressed that the teachers had managed something involving the whole of Key Stage 1 - think that's 90 children who all had some sort of role and all got to be on the stage (briefly) at different points. And by ds's teacher who was singing her heart out and giving a good impression of actually enjoying it, bless her!

Oh, and videoing was allowed but I don't think anyone was crass enough to block the view and headmistress asked for no flash photography until after. Seemed to go fine. Each group of children was invited up to the stage to take a bow at the end so parents could take extra photos if they wanted.

i hate schoolplays too...over excitied children, demanding parents...we teachers never get it right....plays can't be changed as in our school hall bookings are tight as it is..we do keep a stock of costumes but we can't fit out all the children - some too big, different play different parts etc...we are lucky we have storage for costumes not all schools do!!! But why not offer to donate your costume for next years nativity.

"Plenty of babies, toddlers and little kids in the audience - yes, some of them were a bit noisy but that's the deal with a family event, isn't it?"

I don't think so. I think that a child who can't sit still and reasonably quiet should be taken out. It is SO not fair on the performers and the other parents.

By MintyCandyCane Tue 08-Dec-09 10:20:06

'We had to do camels last year. They wore yellow t shirts with a cushion shoved up the back they looked like a row of Quasimodo impersonators.'

I got this far and cannot physically read any more of this thread - I am in absolute agony LMFAO.

Well update - and appreciate the comments because can't decide myself. I should have emphasised it's not just my child - up to about a quarter of them (yes really) have this croupy thing. Apparently teachers were taking some of the roles yesterday. Anyway, my child insisted on going in today - allowed it because temperature down but well, we shall see... going in this afternoon but would still prefer had they said they would do a quick rerun next week.

No - not a camel - that I would just have given up on! - a dancing mouse - list included black belt (finally tracked down in last charity shop I could find), leg warmers (last seen in Pineapple circa 84), mask, etc etc. Deeply envy those of you with schools who keep stocks of costumes.

Sympathies . dd is off sick today - ear pain and generally below par. Had dress rehearsal yesterday and she came out really cold Hopefully a day at home, nurofen and maybe ab's if it is an infection, will sort her out. She is desperate to make tonight's performance.

I really don't get the problem with younger siblings attending a primary school play. Whether or not there are screaming babies in the audience, you usually can't hear the lines anyway because they are delivered by primary school kids who speak very quietly and/or mumble their way through them while not facing the right way (etc, etc).

In any case, the issue of other parents who don't have the social skills to take their screaming baby out of the hall and calm them down is a separate issue. DP and I would like to go to DS 1's play together and take the 3 month old baby with us. However, if he was annoying or noisy I'd probably feed him and, if that failed, one of us would take him out of the hall. We'd do this not simply because it's only polite and fair for everyone else, but also because we don't enjoy listening to the baby scream either. With older babies and toddlers parents really should be teaching them how to behave in these kind of situations. How do they become properly socialised if you ban them from social occassions? A school play really is a family event and many of the kids performing do genuinely want their younger siblings to see then up on stage.

As for the photography and video recording, to be honest I don't actually mind if the school bans it. I do mind when they make up spurious (and incorrect) reasons for doing so. Simply stating that video recording and photography can prevent other audience members from seeing and that the school (who aren't charging for tickets) would like to raise some funds from DVD sales would have been perfectly fair.

We'd also be quite happy to attend an afternoon performance expressly designed to be a family event for those with young children, but for some reason it's evening only and no wee kids. Usually thf school go for 'sharing assemblies' during the school day where parents can attend with other kids but year 5 do a show instead.

I went to see DS1 today.

He was an angel
The tinsel I had meticulously sewn around the hems and edges of his white t-shirt had all mysteriously come off! LOL I knew he didn't want it but even so, the rehearsals must have been very dreary!

YANBU if they expect complicated costumes. Ds's new teacher has a no purchase rule, she says just use what you can find at home.

But I thought ds's show was just too long. two songs per class, just make it snappy, one song each bit of dialogue then let us all go!

Great though that kids get to perform a lot, so good for their confidence.

In my experience, the teachers are happy with a tee shirt with tinsel or a dressing gown and a tea-towel - it's the parents who get all Cecil B.DeMille about school plays!

If only a quarter of the kids are sick there's NO way the play should be canceled (or even rerun). 75% participation is a miracle in December.

BTW, does anybody need one more thing to do in December? What are teachers thinking when they come up with all these demands on parents during the holiday/flu season?

Making costumes is part of the job of parenthood.

I hate the school nativity. i think it's awful. The horrible tape recorded music, the perplexed, bewildered and often crying participants, the annoying parents who video it all so you can't see past their mobile/camcorder, the cringeworthy HT bit...makes me feel ill, sorry. Of course some of the kids enjoy it but most of them look bored, ill, nervous, etc etc.

and everyone is going 'aww aren't they sweet, little so and so is crying/said her lines wrong, how sweet'

I don't get it.