In thinking an Ipod Touch is too much for a 9 year old?

[MadameDefarge]

Ds' father has decided to give him an ipod touch for Xmas. I think this is way too much for a nine year old to have, and I am worried about the internet access...

Am I being over-protective? His father thinks I am.

What on earth is the POINT of a touch if the net is disabled? V expensive machine if it's potential isn't used. If I was a techno-expensive-gadget-enthusiast, i would be keen to teach a child about matching cost / need / applications and making rational choices.

Also, a serious concern of mine would be that something like that is a v tempting target for muggers - mugging for expensive phones so comin round us, and amongst teenagers. He's too young to be made so vulnerable, IMO.

But hey ho, don't know wat you can do if his Dad is in agreement. What a twat. People use money v badly.

Have just checked the Apple site. The parental controls on an ipod touch are pretty rudimentary - they allow you to either 'enable' or 'disable' Safari (the Apple internet browser). So you can have all or nothing. There is no way of limiting web access without buying some additional content filtering solution ie mobicip or similar

I understand your worries about ds learning the value of stuff. I don't think that is necessary mutually exclusive to owning these gadgets. Technology has changed the world, our kids are way more sophisticated than we were and I think our methods of instilling values have to change to reflect that.

I think it is shittty of your ex to do this to you though, you clearly have concerns about internet access and he isn't exactly doing much to allay them.

YANBU - my 9 yr olds has just had his birthday and we got him a Ipod shuffle - we are buying a ipod touch for Christmas - BUT THAT IS FOR ME AND DH !!!

Over the years my son can upgrade his ipods from shuffle to nano to touch or whatever they bring out next !

I see what you are saying TSH. My DS has a Nintendo DS and has never broken it - his pal has gone through 3 PSPs in that time.

I still thought an iPod Touch would be too much for my DS. I don't think the OP is against iPods in general but the Touch is way too much for a nine year old. They don't need all the extras.

Thanks APG for checking that. I think I am going to have to negotiate ground rules for usage, ie, no internet access unless in presence of an adult, asking if sites are ok etc etc. I know ds would comply with those rules, just not if exp would bother.

This all comes on the back of ds telling me how great he is at Halo 3 {shock]...he father knows that I want him to only play and watch age-appropriate games and films, yet he goes and plays that with him!

It just makes me so cross. I cannot trust him to make appropriate decisions or to discuss with me first.

And it puts ds in a bad position because he knows how I feel, and tries to protect daddy from my annoyance, so I have to accept it as a fait accompli, while putting is ds in the position of policing his fathers choices... grrhh!

if he gets one, just load it up with lots of games and educational stuff, - most of it free - and hopefully he'll be too busy with them to even think about the internet side of it.

I actually wanted a nano, cos i liked the colours but got given a touch instead. My entire family love it - we are nintendo-ds-less though.

good idea, twooter. I'll try and negotiate that.

Not sure if I should be sticking up for him or not but is it possible that your ex knows Halo 3 pretty well and considered that it was OK for a 9 year old to be playing?

I know it does have a "15" rating but I've heard a lot of people say that that's pretty harsh and it's basically like the Star Wars movies.

It's certainly not a gore packed horror game loaded up with adult themes.

If he'd been playing Grand Theft Auto or Resident Evil I'd be very concerned though...

Dd got one for her birthday this year. She is younger though so doesn't have any desire to use the internet on it, if fact not sure she knows it can go on the net. It makes it easy as I decide what to download and what apps go on it.
I think it is quite good for young ones (as in a better option than a ds or psp)as the controls are so simple and games cost next to nothing and lots of educational stuff there to.
The parental controls are pretty rubbish but do mean you can tuirn off access to the app store and safari but simple enough for you to get access to. If he has access to the pc at home don't think the touch will be any worse.

Badgers, when I realised, I didn't have massive go at him, but did google and and the general consensus seemed to be it wasn't too bad, just a bit mindless....so I did a deal with ds as to how much time he could spend playing it. ITs just exp knows how I feel about this stuff, and he still does not think he needs to discuss it with me...and its not like I am not going to find out! I'm not unreasonable, and there are some films which have an older rating (such as the Lord of the Rings) which I thought were ok for him to watch...

YANBU, That's what DD3 has asked for for her 18th.

I'm in the fortunate position that my dear dad is passing on his older ipod touch to my ds for Christmas. I have to say, that I wouldn't go out to buy one, but I'm very grateful. I have bought ds a speaker stand for it - he listens to the same music ad-infinitum as comfort at bedtime, and I'm so pleased I can put it on the ipod as his cd player's on its last legs.
Ds is nearly 10 and already browses the internet on his dsi.
Ipod touches do not run 'flash' websites, so there's one sort of control. The software also does not support a lot of embedded videos in websites either.
Ds mainly uses my iphone (when he can get his hands on it) to play some of the games we have downloaded as apps - he really likes the word games such as bookworm and scrabble. You can even download children's books as apps, but I'm not sure he'd read them!

I think it's a bit much for nine. If dad is very gadgety, play up how much your DS would enjoy making videos on one of the new Nanos. Gadgety present, but no internet

nano is a no-no apparently.

After having row with exp yesterday, today we have been very grown up and I apologised for being annoyed, and he has assured me that he will disable the web, and only download education stuff and audio books, and a couple of games. He also says he wants ds to start using the schedule so he can begin to understand about timetables and checking what he needs for school the next day...

So maybe it'll be fine.

I am now feeling a bit permissive for a change (I am usually accused, not least by my DCs of being very strict and I often do seem to be!)

My DS got an IPod Touch for his 14th birthday in May this year and managed to lose it by September!!!! Aaaarrrh!!!! I will not tell you, dear MNetters how but he is a burk and many many people have enjoyed reminding him of this since then. He has asked for another one for Xmas and has PROMISED me he has learnt his lesson (and inasmuch as he could have had something else for Xmas I hope he has). He actually really enjoyed the one he had - games, music etc. and useful apps).

Now my 11 yr old DD wants one too and I have actually decided that this might be OK. It is rather a large present, more than they usually get but I am only getting the 8kb one (Comet seemed to have them quite cheap or at Tescos if you buy one you get £15 grocery voucher so as I shop there sometimes that effectively knocks £15 off) and it is a joint present between me and my XH. I am not getting any ITunes vouchers etc with it as they can get that with any money they get. (OK you hear me justifying the expense!)

However, my DD is actually much more careful with her things and is unlikely to lose it. I think that it is far less risk than them having a very expensive phone - i.e. they won't take them to school (my DS was fine about that with his last one) and won't take them anywhere if there is a risk they might get broken/lost. I know there is always a risk but we will minimise it.

I am interested to hear about the disabling of the Internet access. As someone said it is only where there is wireless and I have disabled the wireless in my house anyway as I like to know where my kids are when they are on the net so I can keep an eye on them. However, I plan to hand them over to my BIL a few days before Xmas so he can charge them up (yes - I could do it, I am not feeble! But the DCs will track me down!) and I will ask him to disable the Internet access. Bit harsh for DS maybe but he can go on the Internet at home. And yes - I guess one of the main things about it is the Internet access but my experience with DSs other one is that there is LOADS of other things you can do so they won't miss it.

However, to go back to the OPs post - I actually think YANBU (hypocritically) because it is up to you what you decide for your child - I don't think that I would have bought one for a 9 yr old as I have had to think long and hard about my 11 yr old (and she will be 12 in April) AND I truly relate to your difficulties in getting XP to be consistent with you (mind you if I ever get the money from my XP for these gadgets it will be a miracle!)

I mean I am being hypocritical - not you Madame!

thank your NJ, for that lovely thougtful post. It does help. I am feeling much better about it today. In an ideal world, he wouldn't get one. But after XP's promises (and he did go on a lot about protecting his innocence, and not wanting ds to be tucked away in his bedroom roaming the internet) I feel a good deal more reassured.

I am now out to take ds to a private physio assessment which is going to cost me an eyewatering £300. As a result of which ds will be getting a festive tin of baked beans for his xmas present., and a trip round the neighbourhood so we can press our poor little noses up against the steamy windows of families doing xmas properly!

Now if Exp had offered to pay for half of that, I might be a good deal happier. But it seems there is always money for gadgets, but none for the important stuff. SIgh.

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