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AIBU?

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Original poster

About pre school and Santa letters ?

37 replies

Sassybeast · 01/12/2009 15:39

This year, we are skint. I've deliberately played down the whole 'What santa is bringing ' with the kids simply because we are only getting them what we can afford and what they needs so clothes, books, a few games etc. (Disclaimer - they've got absolutely tonnes of toys so they're not deprived) It's just that due to circumstances, this year we aren't doing huge pressies.

Thought it was going well - when asked by little old ladies what Santa was bringing, littliest would trot out 'New jammies an books and a peppa pig game'

She comes out of pre school today absolutely hyper as she's been doing her 'list' for Santa which seems to have comprised going through the Argos catalogue and cutting out pictures of what she wants. Namely a pink camera, a car with a dog on the back, a pink bicycle with sparkles and a trampoline.

She's talked about nothing else all day - she's adamant that because she's done this letter and posted it in a special post box, then Santa will be bringing all the things

I have NO problem with saying no to my kids but I'm just a bit narked that pre school have taken it on themselves to fuel this blatant consumerism and my baby will be disappointed.

OP posts:
nickschick · 01/12/2009 15:42

Dont be daft its just excercised her cutting and sticking skills......im sure on xmas morning she will be thrilled with everything she gets and that 'collage' wont be thought of.

stealthsquiggle · 01/12/2009 15:44

I would have a quiet word with pre-school and see if they can emphasise the "Lists are to tell Santa the sort of things you want, not to expect to get it all" message.

I would have an issue with this too if DD's nursery didn't have more sense (I will brace myself, just in case, but since my DD's list without input from nursery is "a car (pink), a house (play variety) and a baby (doll)" we have to deal with the problem anyway) - round here, Father Christmas takes credit for contents of stockings only - all other presents are credited to the people who pay for them.

BornToFolk · 01/12/2009 15:48

DS's nursery are doing this too! His keyworker told DP about it at parents' evening last week.

She said that they had given the kids Argos catalogues so they could go through and choose their presents from Santa, then the letters would be displayed so that parents could see them (presumably so we know what they want for Christmas?!)

Personally, I don't mind as DS is only 2 and doesn't really understand the whole "Santa bringing presents" thing so for him, it will just be an exercise in cutting and sticking, which is fine, but if I had an older child, I'd be annoyed for exactly the reasons you say Sassy.

It does create all kinds of expectations for the children. Seems a really odd thing to ask them to do.

FourArms · 01/12/2009 15:49

No, YANBU, DS1's pre-school did the same thing, and he was upset on xmas day that year because santa forgot some of the things he'd 'ordered'!

christiana · 01/12/2009 15:50

Message withdrawn

Santacentric · 01/12/2009 15:53

How odd! Surely writing a list/letter for Santa is something parents do if they want, and not the school? I honestly find that most strange and would have been very annoyed if the DCs had done this in preschool. If they wanted to do lists they could have done something in the line of what presents do the birds in the garden/zoo animals/children from Africa want from Santa???

christiana · 01/12/2009 15:53

Message withdrawn

claraquack · 01/12/2009 15:54

YANBU I would be furious if dd1's school did this. It's hard enough managing their expectations as it is. Given free rein with an Argos catalogue, goodness only knows what she would come up with. At the moment there is plenty of stuff she doesn't even know exists!

mazzystartled · 01/12/2009 15:57

fine to write a letter to santa
and wish him well on his journey tell him who your favourite reindeer is and promise to leave him a baileys
absolutely not fine to encourage rabid consumerism, i'd be horrified if dd's nursery did similar.
yanbu in the slightest

stealthsquiggle · 01/12/2009 16:06

nickschick I would have said the same thing when my DS was at nursery (come to think of it I think they did do something similar - he didn't really get it at all) but if someone did this with DD, she would remember everything she put on there and she would be disappointed if it didn't arrive.

Bramshott · 01/12/2009 16:10

How old is DD? I seem to remember DD1 doing something similar when she was 2 or 3, and she had forgotten all about it before Christmas Day.

lovechoc · 01/12/2009 16:12

I wouldn't be impressed if that happened to DS. That's something that should be done at home with the parents, not at a school. It just gives them the wrong impression about Christmas, that the only thing it's about is 'getting' toys or tat.

YANBU

Original poster
Sassybeast · 01/12/2009 16:14

Bramshott - that's my issue really - she's 4 - and quite a grown up 4 She's just gone over the whole saga again to DD1 - who's just looked at me confused and said 'Thought Santa was bringing books and games. Well if she's having all THAT...'

I don't have a problem with bringing it up with the staff - none of them have kids and I suppose they just don't always think what the impact of these sort of activities are.

OP posts:
chegirl · 01/12/2009 16:19

YANBU at all.

Its insensitive to those without much money.
Its insensitive to those who see Christmas as a religious festival.
Its a PITA to all who try and keep presents plastic tat down to a minimum.
Its annoying to have a school promote this sort of consumerism in tiny children.

Why has the Argos catalogue become as much a part of Christmas as carols, decorations and mince pies?

I wouldnt be best pleased about this. My DS would take it as fact that he would be getting the stuff he asked for. Not because we dont say no to him, because his SN makes him a very literal chap.

biggirlsdontcry · 01/12/2009 16:20

yanbu - i also would be annoyed if dd's pre-school did this , she will be 4yrs on 31/12 & at this age they fully understand xmas & get very excited carried away with the whole Santa business . i think you should have a word with the staff .

FimbleHobbs · 01/12/2009 16:24

Do you think Santa might find some time to write back thanking DD for the lovely letter and nice pictures, maybe mentioning that his camera/bike/trampoline workshop has unfortunately been broken by a careless elf and that he is going to find her and her sister some very special other things instead?

NightShoe · 01/12/2009 18:54

YANBU. I say that as someone who proudly delights in the consumerism of Christmas and is quite happy to sit down with my own DD (3.5) and cut and stick from the Argos catalogue to make a Christmas list. BUT I am sitting with her and I can influence her quite heavily and also make sure that she knows that these are ideas for Santa, not an order list.

I would not be happy if nursery did this with DD as I don't think it is their place to decide if this is right for a family or not.

I think Fimblehobbs idea is fab.

Rosebud05 · 01/12/2009 20:16

I live in a very diverse and multi-cultural part of London and I have observed that nurseries, schools, libraries and other 'public services and facilities' are generally very thoughtful about issues of diversity and inclusivity UNTIL it comes to Christmas when they go bloody berserk. It's wrong for all the reasons pps say. I would definitely complain - in fact, I might even be proactive and find out now what dd's nursery are intending to do to whip them up impart seasonal cheer.

susiey · 01/12/2009 20:22

my dd nursery did not do this and I'm very glad beacause we just pretend santa is a nice game in this house but also most of the nursery are off for eid this week so it wouldn't really be appropriate!

AndiMac · 01/12/2009 20:26

Can I just interject that I think pyjamas, books and a Peppa Pig game is actually a pretty good haul for Christmas. I think that if your daughter gets all that, she's doing well, so don't think that you are leaving your kids hard done by. And of course you aren't unreasonable to be upset about her coming home with a list of things for Santa from nursery.

stealthsquiggle · 01/12/2009 21:01

I think fimblehobbs has an excellent point there. In a case like this where his position has been so grossly misrepresented, Father Christmas absolutely should and could take 5 minutes to reply to a letter and put the record straight.

pigletmania · 01/12/2009 21:33

Its not only about commerciaism, very young children do not really have a grasp on the reality of it all, and not being able to afford things, so this is getting their hopes up and bashing them down when they discover that on christmas day they have not got all that they put on Santas list. It is not right, nothing wrong with making a list without using catalouges, of things Santa MIGHT get, but feeding their young impressionable minds like this. When i was about 5 i went through the Argos catalogue and wrote a list with all the toys i wanted but that was at home, and i pinced my mums catalogue.

pigletmania · 01/12/2009 21:36

Good idea Fimblebobs gosh MNters come up with some great ideas.

2ChildrenPlusLA · 01/12/2009 21:42

My DH just told me that he reckons the teachers do this on purpose to get back at parents!

Wolliw · 01/12/2009 21:43

I would be appauled if this happened at our nursery.
Complain.
I get wound up if people presume my DS (3.5) thinks that Father Christmas is actually going to physically bring him presents. He is aware of the icon, but would no more expect him to come down the chimney than a dragon or a fairy.

There is enough pressure for small children to be consumers, especially at this time of year.

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