Am i being unreasonable???

[robie]

AIBU to expect my DH to get out of bed before midday most days. He is self-employed and doesn't have much work at the moment. He stays in bed til late in the afternoon while I am up every single morning looking after our 2 DC's and the house and the washing and cooking and cleaning and shopping and driving DC's about etc. etc.

I was made redundant in April and haven't worked since and I still manage to get out of the bed in the morning. He is not depressed. His whole family is like this.

AIBU to expect bit of help before 3pm??? Also, I don't want my DC's to think that this is normal behaviour and turn out the same way.
Please help. I feel like running and not going back.

YANBU - my Dh is also self employed with not much work on. He gets up at the same time as me and DS, takes me to work, gives DS his breakfast, does the school run etc.
Even if I was at home all the time he would still at least take turns doing the school run, making lunches/dinners etc

YANBU! I would tell him that tomorrow is his turn to get up, feed kids, make packed lunches and get them to school on time. Then he can do somehousework, as you are owed a bit of a lay in! Otherwise you will go on strike from washing his underpants and cooking his tea (and other more delicate wifely duties!)

YANBU
Does he know how you feel?

Why can't he get up and look for more work?

Has he heard of marketing?

I suggest you make a list of all household and childcare chores, from 7am-10pm and divide them fairly.

He can do his bit around any paid work he has.
Don't put up with this crap- he is a man not a teenager.

Yanbu.
I am a SAHM and dh is a teacher so has long holidays.
During his holidays, we take turns getting up early with ds and doing the chores.

YANBU!!

Do you give him any jobs around the house or just expect him to offer while you get on with them?

Does he do nothing at all to help?

Thanks so much for all the replies and suggestions.

We were together for 11 years and he worked 9-5 before we had kids so this was never an issue. He would always lie in at weekends but so would I most of the time. Now I am up at least once a night and then up between 6-7.30am every morning and I am at the end of my tether.

He does help in the evenings ChunkyKitKat but by then I am exhausted and too annoyed to appreciate it!

I will do a list, as you suggested purplepeony, and see how that goes. He is an estate agent and unfortunately, things are very very slow in our area but he could look for some other type of work if he wanted to.

Can I show him your post fiveisanawfullybignumber - delicate wifely duties - I like that!!!

Does he work on his own? If it is his office surely he needs to be in there creating business and showing the world he is open and ready to go? As a sales professional, surely he should be out there selling himself and his services?

But if he's not, for some reason, then yes he definitely needs to be getting up when you do, or taking it in turns with you to stay in bed, and doing a fair shre of chores. Of course YANBU!

YADNBU - what a piss taker! My husband is a SAHD and when I'm not at work, I take my turn in getting up with the kids and helping out with the chores. Previously, when we were both out of work, we shared the duties inbetween looking for work. In short, he's a lazy fecker and should get his finger out of arse and look for a job and help you where possible!

Be my guest robie. I think a good helping of no clean grundies, no tea and none of the other should do the trick.
As you can see by the fact I'm expecting DC no 5, my DH does more than his fair share of the housework!