to not want my dd to stay at her dads over crimbo

[worldgonemad72]

Hi all

My dh and i have sort of disagreed over this. My ex has my dd on a sat night (he's got a gf and 2 younger kids thats live with him now)He is working nights over christmas, he wants to have her on boxing day which is fine but ive said that as he is working could he bring her home before he goes work. DD gets on well with his gf and dotes on her little sister and brother so dh thinks i should let her stay. It just feels so wrong though, with it being christmas i just feel that she should be with a parent (btw if he wasn't working i would be happy for her to stay there).
What do you all think, am i being unreasonable in wanting her to come home or should i let her stay?

yes,if it were me i'd let her stay....xmas is about family,and the little brother and sister will keep her busy.

enjoy the break,she'll be back soon enough

agree let her stay with the other children and he can return next day

What does she want to do?

She's 8, i never thought of it that way tbh. I haven't asked her yet but she'll probably want to stay.
I wouldn't stop her sleeping there if she does want to stay i just dont want her feel that neither of her parents want her over christmas if you know what i mean.

Let her stay, it will be nice for him to come home from work and be able to spend the next morning with her

If she was going to be left with gfriend I might say bring her home.

But she will be with her siblings!

I would leave the decision up to your daughter. If she wants to stay the night let her and arrange to go out or visit friends, make the most of a night off!

Your exs partner is effectively her step mother and I think its a positive step if your dd is happy with it,your dd is as much your exs as she is yours and Christmas is a season its not just a day....I think tbh you know this but just feel like you need some sort of agreement from other mums that this is ok,it is and you should enjoy the break go to the sales and chill - its a sad fact that Christmas is such a awkward time for families that have seperated.

That answered my question then, thanks everyone. Nickschick your proably right about me wanting to think it was 'ok' aswel by other mums.

Yes you should be quite hapy for her to stay with them. She won't feel abandoned, she's old enough to know her dad has to work and it sounds like she has a good relationship with his girlfriend and kids.