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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not buy my son's school photo

29 replies

katedan · 20/11/2009 16:13

It was not a great photo, his glasses had slipped down his nose and his shirt was all pulled up round his neck. I am cross that no adult at school thought to make him look presentable before the photo.
I feel very guilty as I have bought lots of photo's of my DT's which were taken at toddler group to give to DG's for christmas and had planned to give Ds's photo aswell. There will also be a gap on the wall!!!

So AIBU and should buy the photo anyway or am a justfied to feel very dissapointed and cross that is only photo of year 2 is horrid.

OP posts:

mazzystartled · 20/11/2009 16:16

Oh I didn't buy DS's even though I was practically railroaded into it. He had this lopsided grin in it and the angle was weird.

I think unposed photos are much nicer anyway

Knownowt · 20/11/2009 16:17

Personally I'd get it- the nice thing about school photos is that they form a record over the years and the things that seem annoying now (shirt and glasses) will seem endearing when he's a strapping 16yo.

Having said that, YANBU- totally up to you whether you get it.

etchasketch · 20/11/2009 16:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PandaG · 20/11/2009 16:18

not unreasonable at all if you don't like the picture. I often don't buy my DC's school photos if I don't like them.

As you have bought pics of your other children, can you take some of your DS and get them printed off for the family, so they do get a pic of him too?

belgo · 20/11/2009 16:18

YANBU. You should tell the school that the quality of the photo was not as good as you had expected, so they can do something about it for next year.

Can you get another professional photo taken of your ds?

sarah293 · 20/11/2009 16:18

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

TootaLaFruit · 20/11/2009 16:19

Everyone has dodgy school photos. Buy them, or your son will always wonder why you didn't (and in 10 yrs time the explanation of slipped glasses and skewiff shirt will seem very petty compared to an empty space next to your other kids.)
ps. if its any consolation, my yr 7 photo was a travesty - wonky glasses, hair in a knot at the back of my head (thanks teachers for brushing that out) and because I was so much taller and lankier than the other kids (and the photographer couldn't be bothered to adjust the tripod) I'm all slouched forward to fit in the photo.
I'm sure my mum thought it was a complete waste of money but I'm so glad she bought it as it's now hilariously embarrassing, and I'd be sad if she hadn't bothered.

alarkaspree · 20/11/2009 16:19

Just take a nice picture of him in school uniform and print it out to give to the grandparents.

If enough people don't buy bad school photos then the photographers will start making more of an effort to take nice ones.

Itsjustafleshwound · 20/11/2009 16:20

YANBU - don't pay above the odds for unflattering photos.

TootaLaFruit · 20/11/2009 16:21

TOOTA DISCLAIMER: ps. my school only ever did 1 school photo, not one every year. I guess it's different if you're expected to buy one every year, in which case yanbu.

Earthstar · 20/11/2009 16:24

This is the first year of 6 school years when the school photo has been good enough for me to want to buy!

I am not short of nice photos of my child so it seems ridiculous to pay over the odds for a crap photo!

chopstheduck · 20/11/2009 16:24

My dts have had four lots of school photos since sept. One with their older siblings int he juniors, one with owls on their shoulders, one together and one each separately.

I only bought the junior and the owls ones. I only buy nice ones that I really like. When we had a gap, I jsut got a pic I liked minus school uniform blown up and framed that instead. Most of our pics are without school uniform.

bellavita · 20/11/2009 16:26

Nope YANBU.

I have just got the proof through for DS2 (still at primary) and the basic photo - for 1 is £9.00. I will not be buying it

badietbuddy · 20/11/2009 16:28

I resent the pressure to but school photos as well. But but but...my mum never bought my pictures and it gave me a real complex, which sounds ridiculous but I had siblings whose pictures were always bought and displayed. In your case, I would buy the cheapest package, and distribute them as christmas presents to justify the cost

pigletmania · 20/11/2009 16:32

YANBU, if you dont like it dont buy it. I wish that my mum had not bought some of my school photos they look quite cringeworthy and do not bear any resemblance to what i look like now thank goodness

cat64 · 20/11/2009 16:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

nickelbabe · 20/11/2009 17:00

YANBU: do what alarkaspree said and take a nice pic in his uniform and print it off.

there's a very very very bad photo of me from school that was the last one atschool and everyone bought them for the autograph cards. it was the worst picture ever taken of me and i hate it even now.

piratecat · 20/11/2009 17:05

i wretled with this last yr ( dd in yr 2).

year 1, great picture. i didn't in the end, it was a baaaaaad photo!! I was just thankful tho, that dd was off ill the day the pics came back to school for the kids to take home. DD only found out the other day i'd not bought last yrs!!

this yrs was much better.

PercyPigPie · 20/11/2009 17:09

Tempest do photos at our school and they are reliably dreadful. I usually buy the very smallest one because I feel I should.

Squidmission · 20/11/2009 17:14

Yanbu. I am not buying ds1's first ever school photo as he looks like he's sneering in it!
My friends son (in the same yr andn school) is not buying her's as her ds has his tongue sticking out. They look awful.
I was very disappointed but not bothered anymore.

perfectstorm · 20/11/2009 17:28

My mother never bought any. Said they were awful and expensive. I never gave it a thought, tbh. Kids have more sense than we give them credit for on such matters, and I always knew she adored us too much to buy "ugly photos of my beautiful children."

LuvLee · 20/11/2009 17:30

YANBU - My daughter started reception in September, and I won't be buying her school photo. It was taken at a horrible angle, and I just don't think it's worth the money. On the morning of her first day at school I took some lovely photos of her in her uniform and these are the ones that I've sent to relatives abroad. Don't feel pressurised into buying the pics if you don't like them.

shockers · 20/11/2009 17:42

I only ever buy the class photos so they can look back and remember their friends in years to come. I take much better photos of my DC's myself!

Takver · 20/11/2009 17:50

Agree with Shockers. I buy the class photos as a memento (they're only taken every other year anyway).

I would buy the individual one if it were an outstandingly good picture - it never has been so I get a good pic of dd in uniform printed up online. That way I can get some other nice pictures done at the same time. (Must now remember to actually send off the pics in a folder on my desktop - have been waiting for ages for DH to add to them!)

Original poster

katedan · 20/11/2009 18:48

Thank you all, at least I don't feel like the only mum who does not buy the photo's. Just showed DH who agreed it was a rubbish photo of DS who is normally looking good in photo's.

I will take the advice about using a different photo as xmas present.

OP posts:

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