Help me sort my head out about this please MNers

[meltedchocolate]

OK i am pretty sure AIBU but i need people to talk it through with me so i can feel OK about it...

My Aunty is getting married she says.. i am so pleased for her. Officially to be engaged at Christmas and then to be getting married later in the year...

Here is the problem i am struggling with...

It is on my sons birthday (her first great nephew/niece)

I don't know if this was a case of, right this day.... oh look it'll be XXX's birthday, or (because she adores him) Oh we must have it on XXX's birthday.

The first one, if that is the case, fair enough i have no problem with that but AIBU to be upset if it was the latter case?

She wants to make him a page boy (it will be his second birthday btw)

I feel upset because if she chose to make it on his birthday... well, that is HIS day, it will be the first time he understands that it is HIS special day (although he prob wont understand the whole concept) And it was the BIGGEST day of my life. I want to shower all my attenton on him on his day.

We will have to travel HUNDREDS of mile (by car!!) to get to her wedding. Like i said i am sure IABU but i just want people to talk it through with me so i can come round quicker. I really am SO pleased she is getting married. She deserves to have a good man in her life. I want her to have that special day... i am just annoyed it is on my DS's birthday.

GO easy on me MN.....

Right, let the flaming begin....

(P.S yes she is aware it it his birthday as she mentioned the fact)

I think he will love the wedding. It will make his birthday even more special.

I don't understand why she is having it on DS's birthday - have you asked her ? can you ask her ?

You could say it you were thinking of doing xx on his birthday, so may not be around for the wedding ?

I think I'd be a bit hacked off TBH, so don't think YANBU.

The other question is, do you want him to be a page boy on his birthday ? if no, say to her.

Thanks Mishy and paisley Dueling Well he is too little to be particularly close to anyone bar me just yet but she is totally crazy about him.

Thanks Tracey

YABU - its really not a big deal.

Yes, we have a Polo. And have just travelled (by car!!) to the other side of the country with 4 adults and a 2yr old in a carseat for SIL's 21st birthday party.

TBH, I'm just glad I didn't have to walk.

Feeling - That's what I am saying, I dont know if it was deliberate or just a big coinsedence. I could ask her - we are very close but having read others posts i dont think i will. Maybe he will enjoy it. Oh yes he will have to be a page boy at her wedding, she would be heart broken if he wasn't.

I'm starting to thinks Me is just being a bit selfish.....

I can take being wrong...

LOL SOH

OK OK so IABTU.....

Meltedchocolate.... I know how important it seems to you now. I would have ben excatly the same and I wanted everything special BUT I think the other posters are right. Your DS won't mind if he has a party the weekend before or after. He is going to be a pageboy so he will be in wonder with what is going on and he will be having a party as well. He is a lucky boy to have an adoring mum and great aunty.

My kids aren't bothered when their party/meal out happens and are quite happy to switch it if something better (In their opinion!!) is happening that day. It's me that is trying to keep the 'specialness' going and they don't give a toss!! It's been like that for years as well!

I don't want to say UABR because I understand. Relax and enjoy!!!!

teameric missed your post sorry. Yeah i know... I will love to see him up with us all, in his sweet outfit. I will be very proud.

Hmm. You have very little say over your wedding day, really - once you've found a venue you like generally they've only got one Saturday available until 2699...

But we did a mammoth car journey on my nephew's 2nd birthday - we were travelling down to a gite in France. He got a present halfway down and when we arrived, I said "Are you having a good birthday, xxx?" He said "No!" I yelled out "xxx's not having a good birthday!" (everyone else was unpacking) They all dropped everything and bundled in with the cake and the presents. He was so chuffed with the Bob the Buider stuff all was forgiven.

I also had my wedding on a friend's daughter's 5th birthday. We had a cake brought in for her, everyone sang happy birthday and we presented it as being her party too. Perhaps your aunt could do the same thing?

"DS, aren't you a lucky boy. For your birthday weekend we're going on an adventure in the car. We're going to a wedding party and there will be lovely food and a party and then we're also going to [insert wonderful attraction local to wedding for subsequent day's shennanigans] and then the following weekend we are also having a teaparty. You lucky boy you".

Honestly, my 2yr old can't think of anything more exciting than driving across the country, singing songs, stopping for picnics, stopping at the services and riding on the ubiquitous and awful Bob the Builder ride ons, spotting things out the window. Drving a long way with a child is hard work but you just do it on their time, wear them out so they sleep lots in the car and make a game of it. And how lovely for him to be able to share his birthday weekend with so many people in a true celebratory mood. Because let's face it, most people are more inclined to feel a bit excited by a wedding than a 2yr old's birthday party. And 2yrs old? He'll be the centre of attention.

Thank you UpAHill - it's OK, you can say it anyway... i can take it.

LOL at "It's me that is trying to keep the 'specialness' going and they don't give a toss!! It's been like that for years as well!"

I can see that happening with us in a few years....

Thank you LongTall

Yeah you are right SOH it will be lovely. Actually now i have my head on straight, he will get to see ALL the reletives that TOTALLY adore him, who only get to see him maybe once a year.

OK thank you MNers. As always...

Must go and wake DS up and head off to Papi's for lunch.

Thanks

at SOH.

Yabu. He will not remember. If it was me i would pretend it was his Birthday the week before. I am mean though.