School Receptionists - A Law Unto Themselves?

[ItsAllaBitNoisy]

9.03am this morning I braced myself and rang the school.

ME: Hello, I think I have an appointment with XXX today at 2.30pm, I would like to.. [INTERRUPTED]

RECEPTIONIST: And what's your name?

ME: XXXX, I'd like to...[INTURRUPTED]

RECEPTIONIST: Right. Phone number?

ME: 01...

ME: I'm not sure if the appointment was ever made, as someone was supposed to ring back and confirm it with.. [INTERRUPTED]

RECEPTIONIST: Was this yesterday?

ME: Er no. It was a few days ag.. [INTERRUPTED]

RECEPTIONIST: Is it about work experience?

ME: Eh? No, it's about my child.

RECEPTIONIST: What's your child's name?

ME: XXX. (Giving up trying to speak at this stage)

RECEPTIONIST: Okay I'll get someone to ring you back to confirm it.

ME: No, I want to cancel it!

RECEPTIONIST: Oh? Well I'll get someone to ring you about the appointment.

ME (Speaking very slowly, and a little louder than usual): I RANG TO MAKE AN APPOINTMENT WITH XXXXX. THE APPOINTMENT WAS NEVER CONFIRMED AS YOU HAD SAID IT WOULD BE. IF THERE IS AN APPOINTMENT, I WANT TO CANCEL IT.
THANK YOU.

I then hung up before my blood pressure peaked.

-Everytime- I ring it's the same chaos.

She's your typical lady in her 60's who appears to think she runs the entire school. Glasses perched on end of nose type, while she peers over them looking at you.

AIBU to want to throttle explain a receptionists job to this woman? What would you do?

YANBU. No way. YABVVR.

I work in a school and have always found the people in the front office to be vile. They treat everyone as if they are stupid/four. If they were the front desk of a business they would have a stiff talking too, or no job! I turn up for work, say 'Hello' and get looked at as if I've got the plague - just stared at.

A couple of weeks ago someone handed in something for me. When I asked the receptionist for it, they said I'd already had it. I went & searched high & low, no luck. Went back to Reception & asked again if they could possibly have put it somewhere. They searched again through the heap of papers and found it. As the receptionist handed it to me, I waited for a "Sorry about that, it must've been put there by my colleague..." or something, but do you know what? She just gave it to me without a word! Just raised eyebrows at her colleague. So bloody rude.

I wonder about their training. I've met very similar doctor's receptionists and library assistants. Do they all go to the same charm school?

I'm sure there must be lots of nice school receptionists, but I can only think of a couple.. and I come across loads through business.

They can be very rude. I wonder if they get into the habit of thinking that no-one (kids???) can talk back to them, so they say whatever comes to mind, reasonable or not. They especially look down on anyone with a van . You develop a very thick skin dealing with them.

But I like the ones I like...

mabh - I hope you're not one of those salespeople who ring schools during lesson time and get outraged when we suggest that the literacy co-ordinator might have something better to do than listen to details of yet another reading scheme? or the ones who pretend to be a personal friend, or that they are returning a call which was never made?

I'm sure you're not, there must be nice ones around, but I've only come across a few.....

I have to disagree as our school receptionist is lovely and very good at her job.

Oh good not just me then.

I had a run in with the same one a couple of weeks ago. I belted in after dropping DD at school and running to an ATM, with an envelope with money for DD to spend at a cake sale (which I had baked for natch), I asked could I drop it down to her (she wouldn't have had her coat off at this stage). OH GOD NO YOU ARE OBVIOUSLY A PEDOPHILE was the reaction I got. I said fine, could it possibly be sent down to her as she's really looking forward to it. "Yes, yes, I'm going down now, I'll give it to her ".

She got it the following day . And was rather pissed off at me for not doing what I promised I would do. AND her teacher gave her money, because obviously her mother is too mean to give her any.

ARGHHH. There's a Home Schooling topic here somewhere isn't there..?

I'm sure there are competent school receptionists out there, just not in our school.

Rusty NEVER I too have been in a job where people thought it a good idea to sell me things and not take no for an answer. I wouldn't dream of it.

However, I regard eye contact and please and thank you as prerequisites to adults who are only trying to give you what the establishment has asked for.

At least I try to be nice.

Itsallabitnoisy - the thing about not letting you go in to school is almost certainly not because they think you are a paedophile, but because they don't actually want parents wandering around school when the teachers are trying to settle the children down to work - did you see the thread on here a while ago where two parents actually started a fight in the classroom? I'm sure you wouldn't do that, but parents who 'just want to drop something off' in the morning do often decide it's a good time to start discussing their child.
And it's entirely possible that the receptionist did deliver the money to the teacher or TA but they didn't pass it on till next day.

YANBU

I often read threads about rude school receptionists on here but I can honestly say I've never met one at primary level. The secondary school receptionist is rather rude but the primary receptionists are lovely, kind and very helpful.

Once my DD forgot her lunch (secondary). I took it in and explained to the receptionist that DD wouldn't know I'd brought the lunch in as she didn't have her mobile, so could someone take her lunch to her please. She told me that she would if she got time (this was at 10.30am). I said well can I take it to her then please? She said No, that wasn't possible. I said that I didn't want my daughter going without any food or drink all day so could somebody else please take it to her? At this point a child in the reception area offered to take it for me. I know that forgotten lunches must be a nuisance and must take up precious time, but surely it is all part of the job, passing on forgotten lunches etc.

Yanbu, she was not really being nice or even polite but the two receptionists I have met at my Dcs school are really nice (well the one who stated a few years back is as nice and competent as the one who retired, there is not two of them).

I think the receptionist is the "face of the school" IYSWIM and it is definitely very important for the school that the first person you are in contact with, as a visitor to the school, does not totally put you off ever comming back.

We're lucky - the ones at our school are lovely. I email them stupid first time mum questions and they send me very patient explanations about How School Works.

BunOven - even the year three children at our junior school can work out that if they haven't got their lunch they need to come to the office to get it sorted out...

At our school, break is over by 10.30, and the teachers would not be pleased at the office staff interrupting a lesson to give something to a child.

We have a 'late kit' box in reception and everything forgotten goes in there. If a child realises they've forgotten something, that's where they go first.

YANBU.

I have a horrible confession to make. Last month I got the alumni magazine from my old school and I was slight "happy" to read that the school receptionist who'd been utterly vile to me had died. Yep, 23 years on after she was first mean to me I remembered her name.

I like the idea of the "late kit box".

Our school (primary) receptionists are lovely and endlessly patient with both parents, teachers and children.

YABU to make such sweeping generalisations but YANBU to be annoyed at your school receptionist.

The one at my dc school is a cow she questioned me in front of a few other parents as to why my dd was absent the day before.

I put my complaint in writing as she is the receptionist not inclusion officer and she got a bollocking.

It's AIBU - sweeping generalisations are the norm

Look, obviously, I'm sure the majority of school receptionists are great. This one is not, and perfectly fits the caricature of the cranky jobsworth that is thought of about receptionists in schools/doctors/anywhere there is far too much red tape.

We used to have a basket in reception where you could drop lunch off if it had been forgotten (I used it once in 6 years). I wish they would put a basket there for "quite important messages" and let the kids sort them. My DD would do a better job of it.

This is it - it is the "Face of the School" just like any other organisation. Is it so hard to be pleasant and efficient.

Head just rang me, have a meeting there on Monday (I was clever - sent note with DD rather than going through reception - otherwise I'd never get a meeting), not about the receptionists obv, but I will make my feelings known.

I, too, am a parent who works at the school. It's not just the receptionists; you should meet the Head's PA! She could frost glass at 20 paces.

I've found that the teachers are generally OK, but many of the support staff are, like the receptionists, curt, and as someone said, there's no eye contact. They never try to help, you risk getting your head bitten off if you ask something, even though it must be obvious that you're new. OK, so they're busy. Who isn't ? No excuse for rudeness. I'm part-time & therefore am total pondlife.

Funnily enough I once bumped into one of them outside school & she was so friendly I had to check it was me she was talking to. Perhaps it's the depressing surroundings, low wages, low morale, not enough funding, endless paperwork etc.

I used to be PA to a big cheese in a big company. There's no way it would've been acceptable to treat people with contempt. I think it's because the school is an unreal world, a sort of closed world where often the dch are treated like it, sadly (and I have witnessed it.) I prefer to deal with the dch rather than the support staff any day; the vast majority of them are lovely.

I bet if you asked school office staff they'd say parents are rude and nasty too.

Please may I join in?

The receptionists at DS school have always been lovely and really helpful. In fact I have always got on really well with the receptionists at all the kids schools.

But there is a new one who clearly thinks its her job to put all of us stupid parents in our places.

Called last week to confirm DS's absence for a hospital appt. I had already told the teacher but wanted to be sure. This is the proceedure I have been following for over 2 years. DS has on average 2 appts per month. Sometimes more, sometimes less.

Me: Just to confirm DS will be at hospital today.
Her: Ok. Well if you just bring the letter in today.
Me: What do you mean?
Her: You have to bring the hosptial letter in.
Me: Since when?
Her: Its always been the case.
Me: Not in the years DS has been coming to the school.
Her: Yes it has and if you havent bought the letters in your son has been absent without permission.
Me: (getting annoyed) I cant bring a letter in, I dont have it (all goes in my diary), I am going to hospital now.
Her: Well I am going to have to report you to the Educational Welfare Officer
Me: Please do!

I do not object to rules about absences. I do object to someone telling me that I have been breaking the rules for over two years and threatening to report me! She was wrong and didnt want to back down. I am happy to take letters etc in from now on because I have been informed of the change in policy but dont pretend its always been like this!

I have yet to hear from EWO btw.

Your school receptionist sounds awful! ours is lovely and very forgiving of my forgetful ways and seems to adore my Dcs. I'd quite like her to adopt me, I'm sure my own mum would be ok with it

Ahem....

Look at it from my point of view..... I am a receptionist in a secondary school.

When you have the same parents coming in every day sometimes 4 or 5 times during the day it does get a bit bloody tedious to say the least.

I do my best to have a smile on my face and extract the information I need without them going round the houses. We have one dad that comes in who stinks to high heaven and he thinks we have got all the time in the world to babysit his sons who won't get to school on time and bloody well behave. He hangs about in the reception area asking if we can check if his sons are in detention. Err no, we can't. Asking if we can tell his sons that they have to go straight home after school if they have no detention, err no, that ain't my job.

Some parents do not understand that our teachers teach lessons during the day and they are not free to ring parents back at the drop of a hat. And yes, they do work outside the school hours..... making phonecalls etc etc, writing reports etc etc, making appointments etc etc. So I am sorry if xyz doesn't call you right back within the same hour, but there is a duty rota to do, lessons to get to, kids to see to.

And FWIW, I do pass your messages on as soon as I get them via e-mail so at least they are written down.

As you were....

Oh and I am not old and have glasses on the edge of my nose!