to be furious at this woman? (bit long)

[Mallenstreak]

My DS attends drama classes on a Saturday and a while ago he said that 2 girls there were calling him fat and saying that no-one at school (they also go to his junior school)liked him. I advised him to ignore them and walk away. This week they made more personal remarks and he retaliated by calling them some names back. The staff sorted it all out and put it down as '6 of one,half a dozen of the other'which I expect was the case. Howver when my DH collected him he saw my DS was a bit upset and spoke to the staff who advised what had happened.At this point one of the girls mother walked in with an angry look on her face and proceeded to have a right go at DS. She said "I've had enough of you upsetting my daugher,it's all your fault etc. I know all the teachers at your school and I'll be taking it further - after all your reputation precededs you!" By this time DS was crying and near hysterical (he has SEN and gets upset easily) and she looked at him and said "I'd better go now".The staff had all witnessed this and were open-mouthed at this display. The manager later called to see if DS was alright but he has been upset all weekend and had trouble sleeping. I am so annoyed - she made no attempt to find out the facts and has obviously believed what the girls said. My son has had lots of problems in the past at infant school but is now doing really well and can do without this setting him back. My DH has a brain tumour and should not be stressed and he was left feeling really ill after all this. I have sent a note to school so they are monitoring situation as DS is scared the girls will confront him in the playground. Some colleagues at work have suggested that she should not have spoken to a child like that and it is tantamount to assault - can anyone give me any further advice? Thanks

I would go and speak to the headteacher to be honest. The mother was well out of order and your poor DS. Make it formal.

Hugs to you! Poor you it sounds horrible. Remember that you and your DH were the ones who acted in a perfectly reasonable and rational way. It was this mother who acted in a disgusting manner.

Your DH's health has to be priority for now so please put it behind you for now. Is your son going back to his class on saturday? I'm sure that once he has been back he will feel much better about it. And perhaps ask the organisers to keep an eye on him to make sure the girls don't say anything nasty to him again.

Also meant to add that you should mention to the school about the incident and what the mother said so they are aware and can keep an eye.

What a horrible woman.

Glad you sent a note to school. Suggest you also ask the manager of the drama group to keep an eye on these girls at the class (but you probably have done this already). In fact, she should be having a word with the mother to warn her that any more outbursts and she won't be allowed on the premises.

So sorry to hear about dh, you can do without this stress.

Thanks for your support. As it happened outside school I can't expect them to do anything about this mother but they are keeping an eye on the children. I just don't think she should be allowed to get away with speaking to someone elses child like that.

She shouldn't - it is awful. Hopefully she feels ashamed of herself for screaming at a child like that! Horrid woman.

We may be at cross purposes, am suggesting the drama teacher needs to have a word with this awful woman. Your OP sounds as if this all kicked off very near to the staff - dh was speaking or had just spoken to someone about what had happened?

Do you know the mother? I don't think I would be able to hold myself back from saying something to her!

No I don't know the mother and it will be hard not to say something if I see her but I won't lower myself to her level. Luckily we have a very good relationship with Head and staff at the school who are very supportive of DS. I expect she will get short shrift if she tries to start trouble there! Still trying to contact drama manager to obtain further info and this womans name.