To be kind of annoyed at my extended family?

[letsblowthistacostand]

This might be a bit long.

I have one male cousin on my mother's side. My granddad was very big on passing on the family name, and since this cousin is the only man with the family name in my generation, there was always a lot of pressure on him to produce a son. He and his wife have 2 girls and are pregnant and they've just found out it is a boy.

The reaction to the fact that they're having a boy is really winding me up. It's as if their two lovely girls aren't good enough and they've FINALLY, FINALLY managed to produce an heir and now they can stop having children.

Also: my three brothers don't count as they do not have the family name. My brother's son doesn't count. And my two girls, really, really don't count as they're doubly removed from the family name, even though they have exactly as many genes from that side of the family as my cousin's children.

One more thing: they've said they're going to name the baby after his two great-grandfathers: Thomas and John. John will be his first name.

Anyway, what do you all think?

um....let them??

Unless he's going to inherit everything/be treated significantly better or somthing huge like that, can't see the propblem with a bit of ooh its nice to carry on the family name.

Well, it goes beyond ooh it's nice to carry on the family name, this baby is being treated like the second coming. There's just this pervasive idea that somehow all the children without that family name (or who are able to pass it on) are Less Important than those that have it. So, my female cousin's son doesn't count, iyswim.

Very hard to explain without sounding petty. There's no money involved and we don't see each other often. I just don't want my girls to grow up thinking they're second rateor my cousin's girls for that matter. It's just so very medievalwe had to keep having children until we had a boy because girls aren't good enough.

I know what you mean, but I think you are going to have to let it pass you by. I'm sure the girls' parents don't think like this, and they are the ones who really count.

Is this a wind up?

John Thomas is slang for penis

Oh I know what you mean. You'd think we were living in the middle-ages or something.

I am expecting DD no.2 much to the dismay of my in-laws - DH is the only son and we will therefore not be carrying on the family name etc etc. It is an absolute load of cobblers - it's not like their family has ever achieved anything nor is it a particularly unusual name. Anyhoo... I do understand, it feels like your own children are viewed as 'not good enough' for being the wrong gender which is irritating but really if they're going to behave like that who cares what they think.

Not a windup. I know what John Thomas is slang for so was a bit when my mom told me but they are in the US and I don't think it's so bad there. DH and I had a private snicker though.

My mom is debating telling them about the JT thing.

Look, they're nice people. It's not just them I've got the problem with, it's also all the people who have asked me if I'm going to keep trying for a boy--um, no, I'm quite happy with my 2 girls, they're lovely.