to be fed up with my MIL bringing gifts all the time?

[DrDoobs]

since she started working in a charity shop my MIL always arrives with loads of clothes, books and jigsaws at each visit. I'm going to sound ungrateful I know but it annoys me because we don't need all this stuff, most of it I don't like, half isn't even the right size, my children are being spoilt rotten, I have to deal with taking it all to the charity shop (a different one) afterwards, it means I can't justify buying any clothes myself for them as their drawers are overflowing, it all smells of the horrible fabric conditioner she uses etc etc. Mostly I think it just goes against my own efforts to ensure they value presents when they get them as I don't believe children should grow up thinking they always need more stuff.

Or maybe it just annoys me because she's my MIL

How can I stop her wihtout causing offence?

Can I join in!

Mil is the same; either bringing stuff with them when they visit or sending stuff in the post - not huge things, but tat that the girls don't need or want.

DD1 (6) actually asked me why grandma keeps sending stuff!

They also have more toys at their home than we do. I find her obsessive tbh. Every time they go anywhere; even for a weekend, they send the girls a postcard.

I know it's kindness, but it is driving me mad. I just want her to butt out - as mean as that sounds - it does the girls no good, as they just don't appreciate stuff.

We asked the in laws to stop bringing presents when it wasn't birthdays or christmas. They don't see ds that often for geographical reasons and they felt they had to bring huge gifts everytime they came. It was lovely and thoughtful but it made me uncomfortable. We explained that we loved to see them and that it was kind of them to bring gifts but it was unnecessary and we didn't want them to feel like had to bring something all the time. They were initially a bit upset but they have got over it and ds got a very small birthday present from them which was his favourite present and we told them so.

sexonlegs - is the postcard thing really am indication of obsessiveness? My Mum has always done that to me (although now they're addressed to the whole family), and I've really liked the thought. Maybe it's a generational thing and nowadays people send a text to say hi?

And on the upside, if it's stuff the girls don't want then they're nt going to be spoiled by it

I just find it a bit ott; a postcard for each of them if they are away anywhere.

And the fact that the girls don't want the stuff and therefore aren't spoit by it is irrelevant imo. It is the fact that it seems to result in them not being grateful for anything.

She has now bought us a nightlight for dd2 (2.5)who has been waking in the night for about 6 weeks. We already have a nightlight and her main light is left on overnight on the lowest setting ffs.

I know she is trying to be helpful, but I just want to scream at her that these are my children, you have had your turn with yours, so fuck off and leave me alone.