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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to get annoyed when people make out my cats are going to eat my baby..

70 replies

celebmum · 15/11/2009 18:51

As the title says really, I have 2cats (5ys & 2ys so not kittens) both of which are indoor/outdoor cats and prob a teeny tiny bit spoilt... and I am 17+2wks preg
..however all i'm getting at the mo are comments along the lines of 'those cats are going to eat/smother/bite/scratch/harm the baby when it comes.. and its doing my head in!!!

they are domesticated pets/family members not wild monsters and i am a responsible adult and will be capable of looking after my baby!

sorry.. rant over!

OP posts:
Rantagonist · 15/11/2009 20:01

Totally, 'animals roam in filth all day' maybe a bit OTT? unless you're saying my house is knee deep in filth? lol

But the same risk could apply to cars/walking down the street/getting out of bed in the morning, but then if you don't like animals and presumably don't have much experience of them, then that would be a normal thing to think.

So it's you who keeps the myth of animals being likened to beelzebubs arse going??

LunaticFringe · 15/11/2009 20:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Chulita · 15/11/2009 20:05

I grew up with animals, dogs, cats and chickens mostly, definitely have a soft spot for them. We had 2 cats when pg with DD and one got killed, 2 months later DD was born and the other cat reacted very badly. At first it was just the peeing/crapping in corners which was jealousy but he started sleeping on everything she did, bouncy chair, moses basket, pushchair etc Her clothes were covered in cat hair, he wasn't very good at cleaning himself which we dealt with when it was just DH and me but when I found poo dribble on DD's stuff and had to wash it at 90 degrees...hmm. When she was old enough to lie on her mat he'd pace around her and she would watch him and giggle but he'd react by tapping her on the face. He had to go. I cried for about a week but in the end I didn't trust him around DD. It truly wasn't his fault, I think losing his friend really knocked him back but I just didn't trust him. Different circumstances though...
Ah, ramble over, YANBU - our cat was odd from the start

TotallyAndUtterlyPaninied · 15/11/2009 20:06

Haha beelzebub's arse, yes, that's me. I'm allergic so that might be why I associate them with dirt as I feel dirty when I get rash/itchy eyes/sneezes/wheezy etc. Like I need to shower off the allergy lol.

I can't stop giggling at 'beware for your goldfish might splash your child'.

Kaloki · 15/11/2009 20:10

The only time I've seen a cat attack a child is when it's provoked. Not the cat's fault, if someone pulled your tail (ssh, you know what I mean ) you'd be pissed too.

wildfig · 15/11/2009 20:13

Duh. Haven't you seen Lady and the Tramp? As soon as your back's turned the cats will be singing sarcastic songs about the baby and generally making trouble.

chestnutblue · 15/11/2009 20:14

I have two kids and when I was preg with both repeatedly bad people saying cat was going to smother/eat/maul babies and when were we getting rid of him??!!
He was totally disinterested in first babys things but would sit beside cot and 'chat' with my ds! Only incident was when ds was 1 and a half and became obsessed with cat (tail/ear pulling eye poking etc). Finally cat bopped ds on nose with soft paw.
With my new dd cat really likes her cot (same one as ds had but different effect) and has jumped in on many occasions but ONLY WHEN SHE'S NOT IN IT! He doesn't go near it when she's in there however i have made sure door is closed when she's sleeping.
Cat also chats to her and will stand next to her and let her stroke his fur/yank it out at the roots...
All animals are different and you should always be vigilant but I have yet to hear of child being smothered by cat.
Most cats I know just want a quiet life!

Grandhighpoohba · 15/11/2009 20:15

We had to rehome one of our cats when I was pregnant, he was lovely but high-maintanance, and was very upset with me being pregnant, peed on everything, including me! Friends brought their toddler around to the house two weeks before I was due, and he completely freaked out, so I thought it would be safer, and kinder to him to get him rehomed. Cats protection came and picked him up while I was still in hospital, and I cried and cried.

I don't agree that it is like rehoming a child when the sibling comes along though, as much as I love my cats, and miss him, children come first.

ThatVikRinA22 · 15/11/2009 20:41

yanbu.

i had 2 cats when i had my kids, my cats got all maternal and loving. it was quite cute! just use a cat net on the pram/moses basket. theyl be fine.

as an aside i just had my dogs clipped, and when i went i had a natter with the kennel owners. they got a cat 6 weeks ago from a bloke whose wife had just had a baby - he said he would collect it in a few days - 6 weeks ago.
he has no intention of going to get it back. that makes me .

the guy who runs the kennels is a lovely bloke, always taking in waifs and strays and uncollected pets. he recently got a pointer dog from a family who didnt want it anymore, he said she stood there blubbing, said it cuts no ice with him, if they were that bothered about the animal in the first place theyd put the effort in and keep it. i totally agree. all my pets bar one are rescues, people treat animals as disposable and it pees me off. (he also got a samoyed that was booted out cos it left white hairs on the carpet!!!....people are so thick sometimes.)

WhereYouLeftIt · 15/11/2009 20:54

YANBU. My cats predated not just DS but DH too. They didn't give me a second's concern when DS was born. In fact, they pretty much ignored him. They had a catbed which hung on a radiator, sooo much more attractive to them than his cot! I don't think they ever even went into his room let alone the cot. They'd occasionally approach him in the living-room and have a good peer at him and a bit of a sniff, but then seemingly decide to go back to ignoring him. And he took pretty much the same approach to them until he was about three or so.

All you can do is ignore the doom-mongers.

wreckofhesperus · 15/11/2009 20:55

I have two enormous Maine Coon cats who were my babies before my actual baby. The female cat has hissed at DD a few times (she more than asks for it) but never scratched, bitten etc. Male cat regards any attention as good attention and just leaves if things get rough. DD now insists on feeding them biscuits so they're becoming more tolerant.

We had cats when I was little and I used to dress them in doll's clothes and wheel them around in a pram... Obviously won't let DD do this. Well, only a couple of times

TigerLightsitandscarpers · 15/11/2009 21:01

ooh, wreck, ours are Maine Coons too. The old ones were the ignores, then adopted DS as their favourite human. The baby MCs (they have lynx tips, they are gorgeous) just think he's another enormous kitten.

RustyBear · 15/11/2009 21:15

My SIL had two cats who were about 2 years old when her DS was born. She said it was obvious from the start that while one of them had no problem with the baby, the other one hated it, hissing and spitting whenever they were in the same room and it started peeing & crapping everywhere.

She practically blackmailed MIL into taking them, saying she'd have to have them put down if she didn't (I'm sure she never would have, but she wanted to rehome them where she would still be able to see them) MIL had the cats for about 10 years and they were spoiled rotten - MIL stopped going on holiday because she 'couldn't leave the cats'

sweetkitty · 15/11/2009 21:25

I do think though that you should designate one room or place for the cats that the DC can't or won't go into. Ours sleep in our bedroom upstairs during the day and you very rarely see them, the DC know not to go in that room and the cats know that that room is their safe haven. Especially important once they have toddlers and have their little friends over, I have friends who have been in my house a lot and have never seen all 3 cats as they never come downstairs during the day.

It's funny because every night at 7.30pm there is a cat descent and they take over the downstairs once the DC are in bed. Two run away from the DC and one is so placid he would allow them to sit on his head, any tail pulling is met with a NO and the DC soon learn the nice way to treat pets, the cats actually quite like the older ones now.

Some of their friends totally freak out when a cat even enters the same room as them and I think that's a little sad to never have had contact with animals.

Emster30 · 15/11/2009 22:23

My cats are great with my friends' and neighbours' babies - they are far more patient with them than with adults and will stand for a lot of fur tugging/tail pulling/eye poking. When they've had enough they just run away (which they always do now from the 2 year old downstairs who screams their names when she sees them!). So I'm pretty confident I can trust them OK when our baby comes along.

Suppose I should stop them sleeping on our bed at some stage though...

elastamum · 15/11/2009 22:31

Not this old one! I had 2 cats when mine were babies and they neveer went anywhere near them! My MIL was convinced they would try to sleep on the baby! Now we have 3 huge dogs (all female) who adore children!

sweetnitanitro · 15/11/2009 22:34

My 2 cats wouldn't go near DD for the first 8 months, they were most put out by her appearance and sulked for ages. They only started accepting her when they realised they got more lap time that way They are brilliant with her now, very patient even when they get their tails pulled. DD is mad about both of them and is always trying to play but the cats have plenty of safe spots out of reach of little hands!

perfectstorm · 15/11/2009 22:36

I had people ask - assume, really - that we were going to give the dog away, when ds was due. I couldn't believe the stupidity. A dog seemed as disposable as the spare room, apparently.

JjandtheBean · 15/11/2009 23:22

YANBU,

but your lucky they have the cats to focus on, this may protect you from much more useless advice!

I used a cat net, when cot/pram was empty, bloomin thing would sneak in as i removed baby because it was warm, quiet and most importantly baby free!!

usamama · 16/11/2009 08:26

YANBU...I heard the same nonsense from people. We have the world's MOST evil cat...she is feral, and while I love her to bits (and she loves me), she's not at all friendly. However, as mean as she is, she has never hurt either of my kids (ages 3 and 2) without provocation. She gives them PLENTY of warning meows if they are annoying her, and usually 'bats' them with no claws if she's had enough. 99% of the time, she just stays clear of them, and has a snuggle with me once they've gone to bed.
If my evil little thing is fine, then a lovely cat should be fantastic!

girlsyearapart · 16/11/2009 08:34

Try having a Staffie then you really get clueless idiots people going.

The cat thing may have something to do with age? My mum said that when my sister was little everyone had cat nets as if giant killer cats were going to jump out from all over the place

pippa251 · 16/11/2009 08:52

My DD is 4 months old and the cat loves her- he shits himself (not literally) when she cries though and hides under my bed! (Probably copying my DP )

His mate was killed when I was preg (ran over and I was devo'd) and he was fine. He keeps coming to smell her- purs at her and things when she's on my knee.

He loves her room but we don't let him in at night and mostly through the days (as my DP is a bit anal about the cats fur on DD's things!)

She loves him and laughs and strokes him (with a clenched fist!)

Also we always put him outside the room at night when she slept in our room yet my DP forgot to shut the door and the cat just selpt at the end of the bed and didn't go anywhere near her moses.

I think the key is to let the cat have a look at the baby and dispel any intrigue

Fibilou · 16/11/2009 08:56

We've got 6 cats, 5 under 3 years and one 13 year old. People have asked "will you be getting rid of the cats" to which I have fixed them with a frosty glare and said "why would I do that".

They are all extremely docile and apart from one of them biting me when he had just been knocked over by a car and broken his jaw none of them have ever shown a moments' viciousness. One does have a tendency to try and sleep on your head so we have got a cat net but somehow I doubt they will want to sleep in a cradle with a screaming monster !

gingernutlover · 16/11/2009 09:06

our cat used to play on dd's playmat while she was being fed, sleep in her moses basket and cot whenever it was empty, eat her food that she threw on the floor ........

........ but go anywhere near a baby? No way! She completely had him terrified.

She's now 4 and he has never bitten or scratched her, allows her to dress him up and play with him. He did however bite one of her friends (who happens to be quite naughty) the munte he met her PMSL, very good judge of character my cat.

He has however, never got used to the buggy - he is still scared of it 4 years on ha ha. He also sits outside her door when she is ill and goes running if she hurts herself.

Sensible to be aware of where the cat is and where the baby is but no need to get worked up over it or give the cat away IMO.

Morloth · 16/11/2009 09:12

LOL at babies and animals don't mix.

There are 6 of us and we all grew up with dogs, cats (the vicious type kept for keeping the rats down in the shed), chickens, horses, snakes, the aforementioned rats, cattle and not to mention the bloody sheep.

Plenty of bites and scratches and general scarring (all inflicted by the animals against kids being bloody stupid), but we all made it through to adulthood - not an allergy or illness amongst us.