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AIBU?

to think that my work colleagues have forgotten to buy me a present, and to be annoyed at this?

99 replies

Bleh · 26/10/2009 16:38

Office tradition is - on someone's birthday, they do a collection, buy a card and a present. Birthday person brings in cakes. I've fulfilled my part of the deal, they ALL know it's my birthday, and it's now 16:40 and I have yet to see anything present related. AIBU to be annoyed by this?

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Avendesora · 28/10/2009 15:04

Rip the spreadsheet off the wall and set fire to it! Take around an envelope for contributions to your therapy (to get over the rejection)!

Cows!

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ilove · 28/10/2009 16:06

And still nothing

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Chandon · 28/10/2009 16:20

sorry but I find these "forced" contributions very tiresome.

Adults expecting presents from coleagues ? .

I am sorry you are upset, but you did confirm what I always suspected: That the ones making a big fuss, doing the collecting, getting you to sign endless cards etc etc are the ones that would be mightily p%ssed off if it is not reciprocated...it´s all so false and forced.

Just stick to presents for real friends, and family I´d say.

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Bleh · 28/10/2009 16:35

But I'm not the one who does the collecting!

Yip, still nothing.

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DorotheaPlentighoul · 28/10/2009 16:55

Chandon, the OP isn't one of "the ones" you describe. And even if the whole presents thing is deeply tiresome, surely nobody deserves to be excluded at random from an otherwise consistent office tradition.

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Bleh · 29/10/2009 13:38

UPDATE.

Still no present, confused, so emailed our PA. Apparently, they decided after my colleagues birthday the other month that they'd decided to stop doing presents. But didn't bloody tell me.

I am so shocked and frankly furious that I don't know what to do.

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dittany · 29/10/2009 13:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

picmaestress · 29/10/2009 13:56

Really nice of your colleague that just laughed to actually tell you that, rather than let you fume for days.

They sound a like a bunch of immature tossers. I'd be really furious with your PA, what a bitch for not letting you know.

Next time someone brings cakes, make sure you eat a nice big slice...and then cough all over them

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dittany · 29/10/2009 13:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Bleh · 29/10/2009 14:04

Well, knowing my managers, I don't think that this is beyond them. They are complete cowards and hate having to give bad news, so are happier to just not say, or go about it in an a*se about face way. They are also not overly fond of me and other members of my team (they came in and took over an existing team).

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EightiesChick · 29/10/2009 14:06

That's still really mean of them! They should have told you. And when did they decide this, on one of the days that you weren't in the office? Agree with dittany above, maybe this just came to the PA on the spot and she's hoping you will forget by the time another collection comes round (fat chance!)

If they really did decide it was too much, I think they should have done a full year and stopped it then.

I posted something similar recently as I didn't get so much as a card when my DS was born, whereas there are regular collections for other people's major birthdays, weddings etc. I am now going to stop contributing to any more collections, so I think you're quite right to do the same.

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Haunty27 · 29/10/2009 14:30

Bleh - that is bang out of order. I hope you treated yourself.

Was pmsl at 'and to go "where's my present biatches" sounds a bit grabbing, IYKWIM.'

But it's not as funny now that I've got to the end of the thread.

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thisisyesterday · 29/10/2009 14:39

awww you poor thing bleh! i came on expecting this to be really unreasonable, but it totally isn't!
i do feel for you

i would get soem cash together, tthe amount you'd have contributed to all of their birthdays and go and treat yourself to something lovely! then open it in front of them
then tell them you got it for yourself ebcause they were too mean to get you anything, despite you contributing to theirs.

mean odl cow-bags

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Abubu · 29/10/2009 14:44

Poor you.

Happy Birthday for Monday just gone.

I had a similar horrible story at an old job in a shop a few years ago.

Me and another girl both had birthdays on the same day.

There was no tradition of buying anyone anything so I wasn't expecting anything.

It would have been fine, except that about half an hour before the end of the day, someone then walked in with a massive bunch of flowers for the other girl and they all sang happy birthday.

I got sod all.

I don't think they actually knew it was my birthday (although I definitely did tell some people that day) but I was absolutely gutted.

I have taken every birthday off work since then. It helps that my birthday is near Christmas.

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Bleh · 29/10/2009 14:45

Thank you lovely MNers! Well, the next b'days in December, so we'll see what happens then ... I'm not contributing if asked, no question about that. I wouldn't be so upset if they had just bothered to tell me, but to leave me wondering for days is just RUDE IMO and should not be tolerated in polite society (man, I sound like I'm 85).

And yes, I will go off and get something LOVELY and flaunt it in their faces. I really need a new job.

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ZZZenAgain · 29/10/2009 14:47

heck yes, you should flaunt a NEW JOB in their faces

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Bleh · 29/10/2009 14:49

From your mouth to God's ears Zzzen.

Ah Abubu, that is terrible.

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ZZZenAgain · 29/10/2009 14:51

well I don't think my connection is that good but let's hope you're out of there before too long. Sounds like a crap atmosphere there altogether. Great breeding ground for nastiness

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ZZZenAgain · 29/10/2009 14:53

bit like a stagnant pond, isn't it?

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ZZZenAgain · 29/10/2009 14:54

bog or cesspit?

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Katisha · 29/10/2009 14:54

Glad we don't do birthdays in my office. Mind you it's such a vast open plan that we would be skint.
I keep quiet about my birthday anyway - don't want all the 20-somethings trying to work out how ooooold I must be by now...

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ZZZenAgain · 29/10/2009 14:56

I'm thinking bleh is so stylish and impressive that she has them cowed

They could think up little naff gifts for each other but they couldn't think of anything for bleh, they knew she was out of their league

so they copped out

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Bleh · 29/10/2009 15:14

Zzzen ... you are currently my favourite person .

Yes, it is slightly cess-pooly at present. Have to hang on a few months, and then LEAVE.

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agedknees · 29/10/2009 17:58

If they were going to stop giving pressies they should do it at the beginning of the year, ie they should have waited until Jan. That way everyone would have got a pressie this year.

They are wankers. Hope you had a good birthday, Bleh despite your horrrible workmates.

Why not make a lovely choc cake filled with laxatives and enjoy seeing them eat it.