to want Simon Cowell to TAKE HIS ARM OFF CHERYL'S CHAIR

[clam]

FGS, he's draped all over her, every week. Can't take his eyes off her, whispering and simpering like a lovesick schoolboy.

I can't help but think that if 'wor Cheryl' looked more like, say, Michelle McManus, a) she wouldn't be sat where she is now (which Michelle McManus isn't) and b) Cowell wouldn't be draping his arm propriatorially around her chair week in, week out.

Chery may be easy on the eye on weekend prime time tv, but it feels a wee bit sleazy that the high-trousered dark-lord of the pop charts has an in-joke with Cheryl that the rest of us can only guess at, and I'm hazarding a guess that he's arranged for her to have some 'work' done through a reliable and discrete source of his (teeth straightened and whitened, botox injections, liposuction and rib removal) and she's sucked his penis once or twice and as a result is now on prime time tv and has lucrative advertising contracts.

Have to agree. Although to be fair, The High Trousered Dark Lord does tend to prefer his laydees a bit darker than "wor Chezzer".

He prefers them a bit more masculine, so I've heard...

Bi, I am reliably informed (but who knows what that means?)- I know that his PRs arrange for him to be seen at Spearmint Rhinos etc to boost his image.

my god is there anyone replying to this thread wouldn't want to look like cheryl cole!! he's a red blooded male who to the best of my knowledge is single..god loves a tryer!!!

Mummysgoingmad - I'd quite like to look like Cheryl, though maybe not so slim. I wouldn't in a million years be able to maintain it though as I like my food, I like a drink and I've not got the time for facials, gym sessions and body treatments demanded of folk like Cheryl. Plus, DP says that she's not much meat on her, which is mean in a way that is supposed to flatter my lardy backside and demean her sculpted, honed buns! Yeah, right! [hhmm)

I've seen photos of her with a very hairy belly which makes me feel a little better.
No one's perfect.

If he's got a hairy belly though imagine what it's like licking his nipples! Like licking a shaggy carpet, and that's from a woman who's partner has a hairy chest! No thanks!

p.s. any thoughts on how to get a partner to shave/wax his chest? I've offered blow jobs in return but he's not willing.

Hairy belly? has cheryl cole got a puabe ladder then?

mind you she looks like a hairy trucker type

Well I like Simon and Cheryl and have no problem watching them being nice to each other. Have just had a conversation with my family about them and both my dils think Cheryl is not genuine and don't like her. I disagree - I think Simon is a good judge of character and always is honest with people, so I reckon Cheryl must be an OK person or Simon wouldn't rate her. Oh and I get so
fed up of people keep bringing up Cheryl's offence in the toilet. She was wrong and there is no excuse for violence but she as brought up on a rough council estate and has probably learned to use her fists, but she wasn't being racist.

I always assumed SC was gay - he's so over the top lecherous in a way that straight men would never be to avoid being offensive!

Plus he's never married... the whole Cheryl Cole thing is just to enhance his public image.

My DH adores her and says what a lovely, gentle person she is. I on the hand also remember the toilet incident and therefore am a bit

simon and cheryl are clearly shagging. and who can blame her, lol

shudder

he hasn't had her - he wouldn't be acting like that if he had.

He wants her
She knows it
She plays him to get Prime Time TV
He knows this but lets her just in case she might ...
But she never will

Men .. they never learn

i think she's asked him to do it to annoy the hell outta ashley. he deserves a bit of paranoia.