to hate 'respect has to be earned'

[addictedtosuckingblood]

it drives me crazy, i was bought up to believe that you respected your elders and peers, unless they did something to loose the respect.

but now a days more and more kids seem to think that respect has to be first earned - like in the case of the school children being asked to stand when the head walks in, the father said - he hasnt been at the school long enough to earn their respect.

he their teacher ffs, they should respect him regardless.

grrrr - rant over.

so give it to me stright aibu?

I think the good manners aspect should work pretty well irrespective of the genuine feeling aspect.

To be quite frank, dd's former headteacher was not a man towards whom it was possible to feel much respect. I could not pretend to dd that this was the case, because that would have involved teaching her things that I definitely thought were wrong. BUT at the same time I made it absolutely clear that I expected her to stick to her usual level of manners. You don't have to conform to the lowest common denominator.

Again, one of her teachers was a lazy slob, with appalling table manners and quite sloppy behaviour generally. Again, I made it clear that this was not a reason for any disrespectful behaviour towards him - though it might be a reason to reflect how very unattractive certain habits are when you see them in other people.

I have lived much of my life in the world of academe, and am frequently appalled at how people act out their feelings in that particular setting. Yes, Dr X or Professor Y may well be an incompetent idiot who is dragging his subject down to rack and ruin, but it wouldn't kill you to say goodmorning in a reasonably pleasant voice, would it? (actually, my current uni are v good, no reflection on them)