to be mighty p***** off with dh for not calling from his golf break this am when ds2 has been really ill

[mousemole]

So, DS2 ( 2) has been poorly all week with a nasty virus - had about 3 hrs a sleep for last 5 nights. DH has not been around much- working late, working away etc. He had a golf weekend with his father booked this weekend which wasn't great timing- he left early sat morning. Anyway, yesterday DS got much worse- stopped eating, fever back and developed these aweful blood blisters in his mouth that started popping and spurting blood, he looked like an extra from a horror movie . So, pack ds1 (4) and ds 2 in car and go to A and E. Wait 3 hrs and when seen they are quite concerned so lots more hanging around seeing various people and then we get referred to a dental hospital as they think he has some infection of his gums. So pack kids up in car, drive across town, unload and wait another hour to see emergency denist. By this point its 7pm, kids are starving, grumpy etc. Anyway, get seen and it's diagnosed as some hideous virus.
Finally get home -speak to DH who has had a great day playing golf and is on his second beer. Remain cheerful and not bitter and say speak tomorrow.
Hideous night - ds2 awake pretty much the whole night screaming in pain and then ds1 wakes up at 6.30 with a temperature and feeling sick .
So, AIBU to be mighty peed off that Dh by 9am had not called ( given I knew his tee off time by 8.10) ? I sent an arsy message saying 'so thanks for calling to see how we are' which prompted him to ring upon which point he says ' oh sorry I didn't call, that's rubbish of me -it's been a bit hectic this morning'.... . His hunogver voice just fuels the anger and I slam the phone down.
Am now sat here fuming with 2 sick kids wondering if IABU ?

Poor old you, well done for coping with it all on so little sleep. Sounds like you need a hand now, so if possible get a message to DH to say that kids are getting iller, you're not coping now although have given it your best shot and reinforcements are needed. Once kids are on the mend and you have had some sleep then if you want to do a post mortem of 'should I/ should he' then go ahead, but in my humble experience very rarely worth it. You know whether he loves you all, and if he does then thats great and he will probably think you are a Goddess for the way you have coped. It sounds like you've done amazingly..what a girl!

thanks all - I agree - there is no point planning some painful punishment, although a golf club up the arse is mighty appealing right now ! Both ds's asleep now so feeling a bit calmer with the respite. I know what you mean about the post mortem's Sallyallyally - they never achieve much do they but then neither do big arguments at the time . Men are just selfish bastards I think.

Mousemole..I think that you could be right.

It would have been nice of him to phone, but perhaps he thought you would phone if you needed him to come back.

It´s a bit of the old expecting men to know how we feel/what we want.

They don´t-you have to tell them!

And in yor OP it does sound as if your son didn´t start to get really bad until after your husband had left.

So, he might have thought it was OK to go?

diddl - yes it was absolutely fine for him to go - ds had had a rough week but we thought he was on the mend. Wasn't ideal timing but not too bad. Why will I never learn that men are never thoughtful and can only think of one thing at a time - in this instance GOLF !

mouse could your ds have - hand foot & mouth infection , it was going around my ds's school last year & my nephew caught it , its blisters on the inside of the mouth ( very nasty) on the palms of the hands & soles of the feet , your poor lo & poor you
i really hope your dh comes home early to help you out , it sounds like you are in for another rough night tonight ,

hi biggirlsdontcry yes that's what I thought it was earlier in the week, esp as he had sores on his tongue, but there is no rash on his hands or feet so they have ruled that out

Forget being angry etc. ask him to come home NOW. Let him help you through the crisis and talk about it later when the kids are a bit better and you have had some sleep.

mousemole - how are your lo's doing ? hope everything is ok , ?

Are the golf clubs out for the dustmen yet?
Hope the dc are feeling better and you catch up on some sleep.

yabu

LOL y bu
adn yab a mentalist

Just book yourself into a hotel for as soon as he gets back so you cna have a full night to recover and he can do his share.