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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think it might be nice if DH helped with packing for family holiday

40 replies

skinsl · 15/10/2009 19:48

Or do they just not do it?!!
Not even crossed his mind that I might need a hand!

OP posts:
pagwatch · 15/10/2009 20:54

so you are not really packing for him.
Just getting the cases from the loft, gettingthe things you think he will need and washing them and puttingthem in the case and then in the car?
And that isn't packing for him - but you would like it if he told you to do some of it instead of you having to guess what he wants to take?

what would you be doing as well if you were packing for him?

skinsl · 15/10/2009 20:57

aha... I'm not putting them in the case... leaving him a little bit of control....

it's the fact that he just thinks it all does itself

OP posts:
pagwatch · 15/10/2009 20:57

and as I sit here fondling my feminist scrotum - why is his bit helping?
Does he help with childcare too?

ScaryFucker · 15/10/2009 21:05

yes, these blokes who don't do their own packing often "babysit" their own kids ...

skinsl · 15/10/2009 21:06

I hate that........ you cannot "babysit" your own children

OP posts:
skinsl · 15/10/2009 21:08

no, he's a good dad, who works very hard and desperately would like to spend more time with his family.... admittedly he is a bit useless on the practical side!

OP posts:
golgi · 15/10/2009 21:09

Mine's forgotten his underwear before now as well.

I do now remind him about the contact lenses as it's a bit inconvenient to have to sit in the opticians trying to get more on holiday (he hadn't packed his glasses either).

But otherwise, his problem.

I'm not allowed to load suitcases into the car though, because apparently I "do it wrong".

TheBossofMe · 15/10/2009 21:11

girlsyearapart - I would have planned it a bit better if I had! We were on a very small island with a very limited gift shop, so I spent the holiday in some lovely bikinis during the day (nice!) but some really hideous shorts and souvenir t-shirts by night (not so nice). DD very happy with her grass skirt, though!

mumeeee · 15/10/2009 21:15

DH always does his own packing.

girlsyearapart · 15/10/2009 21:23

oh well bossofme the answer is to let him pack when you go to New York instead then.

AAAAAARRGGGH to the babysitting thing! Have forbidden DH from saying this. Even on phone to his mates a la 'No I can't come to the pub tonight I'm babysitting'

NO YOU ARE LOOKING AFTER YOUR OWN KIDS

Has anyone noticed this is an emotive issue in our house..

neversaydie · 15/10/2009 22:00

if travelling by himself, dh packs for himself with no problems. Family holidays, he and ds pack their 'toys' and I do the rest. It is easier all round, although I am starting to train ds to pack for himself.

BubbaAndBump · 15/10/2009 22:18

I'm a control freak and like to pack the stuff myself and pack the car in an orderly fashion so I know where things...

Also quite enjoy having the moral high ground that I've done everything for the holiday and what does he do to help, blah, blah, blah. I do enjoy a good argument .

Don't get me started on the whole babysitting thing, blood starting to simmer ...

letsblowthistacostand · 15/10/2009 22:25

DH completely useless with packing BUT he organizes the trip, packs all electrics, and looks after kids while I pack. I consider it a fair trade-off.

Apparently my grandmother was SHOCKED to hear that my mum made my dad pack his own case for a recent business trip!

skinsl · 16/10/2009 08:16

As predicted, 12.30pm he asks me what he should pack!!!! Here's to a good holiday!

OP posts:
girlywhirly · 16/10/2009 10:06

Well, I'm paranoid that important things will be left behind if I don't supervise and pack the majority of things myself. This stems from my first marriage, when, halfway to Gatwick I realised I didn't know where my passport was. It seems my then husband had taken his passport from the fire-safe and left mine there thinking I would get it myself. I had enough to worry about having done a full day at work the day before, looking after 21 month DS and making sure I had all his stuff (his first hol abroard) MIL staying overnight as coming too, etc.

We had to turn back and drive home to get the passport, DS was included on it in those days. We got to the airport just as check-in was about to close, meaning sitting in various seats dotted around the plane. The selfish b-d never even apologised, although he didn't get into a temper. How hard would it have been for him to pick up both passports, and at least give me mine? But that was him to a tee. That marriage eventually ended in divorce.

These days with new DH, he selects what he wants to take and leaves it in a pile on the spare bed, and I pack it into the cases, otherwise we wouldn't be able to shut them. Before we leave the house, I show him that I have the passports, driving licences, tickets, carpark confirmation, insurance and health documents, spare house and car key, as these are the things he worries most about. Once we get to check-in, he takes care of his own passport and boarding card. But he always packs his own stuff for work overnight trips.

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