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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not want to exchange Christmas presents with colleagues?

13 replies

joannaspanner74 · 13/10/2009 14:19

Not sure if this is the right place for this..anyway.
My two colleagues in my team and I have always bought each other xmas gifts. They are both considerably older than me and neither have families. They are also therefore considerably better off than me!
This year, I can really not afford to buy stuff for people who I'm not really fussed about, but how do I nicely raise this without either sounding like a real bah humbug type or a plain old tight ar*e?

OP posts:
itsmeolord · 13/10/2009 14:20

Tell them straight, you can't afford to buy christmas presents for no family members this year.

TheDevilEatsBabies · 13/10/2009 14:23

if you're close enough to them, you should tell them.
maybe make them something.
(with your children if they're old enough )

I don't have any colleagues.

GetOrfMoiLand · 13/10/2009 14:25

Buy them bath cubes or something equally crap. They will be so offended they will never bother you with present rituals ever again.

Just tell them you don't do presents outside family. My colleague was banging on about Christmas cards this week, I said that I never bother with cards for anyone as it is a complete waste of time and effort. The look on her face was priceless.

GetOrfMoiLand · 13/10/2009 14:26

Buy them bath cubes or something equally crap. They will be so offended they will never bother you with present rituals ever again.

Just tell them you don't do presents outside family. My colleague was banging on about Christmas cards this week, I said that I never bother with cards for anyone as it is a complete waste of time and effort. The look on her face was priceless.

ChunkyMonkeysMum · 13/10/2009 14:28

Could you maybe just say that you are feeling the pinch this year, so could you all maybe do a fiver max on each other or something ??

AMumInScotland · 13/10/2009 14:30

Just say, fairly soon as you never know how early people start buying, that you can't really afford it this year and you'd rather not be included. They should understand that, and if they don't then they aren't worth worrying about anyway!

ChunkyKitKat · 13/10/2009 15:01

GetOrf, I agree with you about cards. They are to wish someone happy Christmas, and if you see that person you can wish them a happy Christmas instead.

You could make them some chocolates or something, just melt some chocolate chips and add nuts and glace cherries on the top (in Usborne Chocolates and Sweets)!

Dragonfly73 · 13/10/2009 15:25

do a secret santa exchange with a limit of £5. That way everyone still gets a pressi but it is nice and cheap.

joannaspanner74 · 13/10/2009 15:28

thanks everyone. i think it just feels a bit awkward to say it to them. especially as they are very judgemental & materialistic people. the 'limit it to a fiver' idea i think works really well for friends etc but these guys would probably find that more insulting than getting nothing at all.
agree with everyone about xmas cards at work too. i have gradually stopped doing it over last few years. usually its only women who do it. when i havent sent cards no one has said anything about it. waste of time, money & resources...
tried to get colleagues here intersted in a charity xmas card replacement idea, where you bascially all agree not to send cards but donate an agreed sum to charity instead. if you like you can also agree to all display the same card that shows people you have opted into this scheme.

OP posts:
itwascertainlyasurprise · 13/10/2009 15:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

joannaspanner74 · 13/10/2009 15:58

I did come to a good arrangement with a colleague who used to be in my team. we used to opt for going out for a meal/drinks together rather than gifts. worked well for us.
I think its a really hard one. Once expectations are set its hard to do anything else. Could you take the more junior ones out for a glass of wine to say thanks instead of prezzies?

OP posts:
RatherBeOnThePiste · 16/10/2009 20:44

We do a secret santa at work which is very cheesy, but still funny. We deliberately keep the amount down to make it silly. And, just between us, as I organised it ( going down to a whisper ) I just picked out the one I wanted anyway

daisydora · 16/10/2009 20:47

I was considered a right scrooge at work(when I had a job) because i wouldn't participate in the Secret Santa. The limit was £10 but as I explained to them, I'd rather not waste £10 buying some shit i don't want or trying to find some tat for someone else.

Funnily enough once I'd said my piece I wasn't the only one to not join in

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