to give 'The Lovely Bones' to a 13 yo?

[ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight]

While not being great literature, I felt it was a well written story with a wonderful theme of hope over adversity. This particular 13 yo has been seriously sexually abused in the past so sadly not unaware of the issues written about, and I think it would be a good book for her to read to address some of the issues she has going on, she's at the age where she will be processing her experiences in a new way in light of her own development and sexuality.

Anyway....is it appropriate for a 13yo at all? Esp one who has been abused? What do folk think? I'll ask her mum anyway and she might veto it but I thought I'd ask opinions before doing that.

I don't know really. Did she ask you for literature about child murder?

Personally I didn't think it was an amazing book, and would hesitate to give it to a child of that age, especially one with such a past.

Trying to think of other books which deal with adolescent development/awareness of sexuality, and sure there must be some more appropriate texts. Judy Blume is probably well out-of-date, but might be worth revisiting, or even Anne Frank's diary - which is about identity, adolescent love/sexual feelings, triumph over adversity, self-expression etc.

i would have thought it would be about the worst book you could give her? sorry but i really wouldn't

Ok! Have thought about it a bit more and you are right. I'll think again!

To be honest I found it a very good book too but I think it may be a bit too much for a 13yo to deal with especially one who has been abused herself.
It is nice that you are trying to help her though so good on you!

Glad you've had a rethink. I think the book is vile and manipulative and it sounds as if this young woman has had quite enough of that in her past.

No Kat, AIBU doesn't work like that.

You don't start with a reasonable and amiably written OP, and then just listen nicely and understand everyone's point of view, and, gasp, change yours!

Your supposed to stomp your feet and things.

Ooh, I don't think anyone here could really say whether that book would be suitable or not given the circumstances.

It could be appropriate for some thirteen year olds, depends on how mature they are. But personally from what I remember of it, I'd be wary that it would be the actual rape and murder that would stick in the child's mind and that they may not be old enough to appreciate the more subtle themes.

I think TBH I wouldn't go there.

And I didn't think it was such a great book either to be honest.

Maybe let her Mum read it first then make her own mind up?

Can't remember it too well was ages ago that it came out so don't remember how graphic it was.

Ok you are all a bunch of mean cows! I was right and I'll do what I want so there [sticks tongue out]
I'm not sure about Judy Blume, it was a bit dated when I was a kid! Anne Frank a good idea but she'll probably get it at school and I would like to get her something she'll enjoy. Any more ideas? She's a lovely girl, fairly mature for her age and bright.

I actually liked the Lovely Bones. I know it doesn't get great reviews on here. Not sure I would RECOMMEND it for a 13 yo, abused or not, but probably wouldn't stop my dd reading it that age. I read all sorts, not all of it entirely suitable. But strangely I only remember the GREAT stuff I read, not the Mills & Boon, Sidney Sheldon, James Herbert bollocks.

I really enjoyed it as an adult light read but I too think it is a bit too much to take for a child especially an abused one.Btw you sound like a lovely person.If she enjoys a good read I'd suggest the Inkspell trilogy which is engrossing but non threatening.Its by Cornelia Funke.

It gave me nightmares for weeks and I read it when I was 27. I wouldn't give it to any 13 year old to read.

ummm - no way in hell would I give this to an abused child. I would suggest something non sexual and coming of agey instead.

I wished I hadn't read it, not that it wasn't well written or gripping, just one of those books that 'stays' with me in a sad way. So no, I haven't recommend it to anyone.

Maya Angelou has written about her experience of abuse (and racism) as a child and how she suceeded beyond this, perhaps that may be more appropriate (but probably at 16 plus years I would think).

I loved the Lovely Bones, but for an abused kid? Uh uh. And there's that bit at the end where she enters the body of her friend and has a rather mind-blowing full on 'encounter' with her old boyfriend. Think that might be A Bit Much.

How about 'I Capture the Castle'. Or Elizabeth Jane Howard's 'Beautiful Visit'. Both kind of gentle, yet feisty 'coming of age' novels.

Or 'The Secret Life of Bees' which is about a young girl running away from a kind of abusive situation, (physical) and finds strength in the sisterhood of some amazingly strong women (plus she meets a cute boy!)

Hell no, it's a disturbing book. def not for an abused child. what are you thinking??

Are you going to recommend 'Lucky' as well?

Hard going. A bit too much for a teenager. Great read, just not right for what your thinking. Anyway, isn't it a graphic murder/abuse to start? No No No. Not the right book imo.

No way. Too young, the book is inappropriate for both her age and circumstances.

no on account it is schlocky sentimental rubbish about a child getting murdered.most inappropriate

OK OK OK
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Bonkers idea, misguided, yup.

but the pain now is the endless answers to the inane question

and you did ask a daft question

so hell mend ye

Glad you've rethought it. I wouldn't give it to a 13 year old, and definitely not one who has been "seriously sexually abused"