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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be fuming after this?

40 replies

branaire · 03/10/2009 23:48

A few days ago I emailed my mother and father a few recent photos of DD (16 weeks), including one of her where she was sharing a bath with DH, her dad. On speaking to the folks, my mother's first comment was that she hoped that DH was wearing trunks in the bath with DD, implying that to do otherwise was indecent or "not right" in some way.

This was on the morning that the awful nursery paedophile story hit the news. I keep trying to justify this in my mind as her typically overreacting but tbh, I was completely and am now

AIBU? Help please

OP posts:
Hando · 04/10/2009 00:58

I think it's perfectly natural for children to see their parents with no clothes on. Just generally walking around the house getting ready, in and out of the bathroom etc. Our bodies are nothing to be ashamed of, we all have (roughly) the same bits after all! However, as an adult I still find it a bit uncomfotable if my mum walks around with no clothes on in front of me. She just thinks it's perfectly normal, which I suppose it is.

All this open mindessness about bodies and nakedness didn't stop my daughter (5)shouting "boobies!!" "boooobies" "BOOOOOOBIES" when I was at the doctors and had to take my top off to have my blood pressure taken though!

JustAnotherManicMummy · 04/10/2009 00:59

YANBU.

What a stupid comment.

DS's first bath was in with me. We have photos and you can't see anything offensive (other than my dribbly post-pregnacy tummy) because the angle they're taken from has DS obscuring nethers and my arm covers boob.

Wouldn't show them to my mother though. She'd make some personal remark. Probably about my tummy.

Original poster
branaire · 04/10/2009 01:32

LOL Gibbon and Hando... Am now feeling fully justified in my WTF are you talking about response and will carry on as we were (keeping an eye out for the poo)

OP posts:
GibbonInARibbon · 04/10/2009 01:38

Glad to hear it branaire!

lolapoppins · 04/10/2009 08:16

YANBU

I have always been lucky on the poo front when I used to bath with ds as a baby/toddler (he gets far too smelly and yucky now to want to share bath water with), but my dad always tells the story of when I was a baby. We after a bath together he only ralised I had done a massive poo in it wheh he stood up and squsihed it between his toes

sarah293 · 04/10/2009 09:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

lolapoppins · 04/10/2009 09:35

I stopped having baths with ds when he was 5 I think. But only because I am not the sort of mother who insists he has a bath everynight and when he does it's usually because he is all sweaty or covered in something nasty, and I don't want to share that water

He is nearly 7, and loves having a shower with dh though, and will often hop in with me if am having one. We have no hang ups over our bodies in our house though, we all get dresses, undressed in fron of each other etc.

tinkerbellesmuse · 04/10/2009 09:47

A HV said something similar to me when DD was first born.

Can't remember how the subject arose but was no doubt during a conversation about how important skin to skin and baby massage were (as long as not done by fathers -obv potential peados te lot of them ) She was a certifiable nutter.

TheBatterflyEffect · 04/10/2009 09:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

elmofan · 04/10/2009 10:01

yanbu - my dh wouldn't even change dd nappies when she was a baby & its comments like your mums that make dads nervous , i got revenge though when ds was born dh had loads of nappies to deal with .

dearprudence · 04/10/2009 10:04

YANBU. Your mother sounds weird.

My DS is 7 and still showers with both me and DH, and occasionally I jump in the bath with him.

starwhores · 04/10/2009 10:04

She probably didn't want a photo of your DH naked.

HidingFromTheDM · 04/10/2009 10:17

I sent one of me and my dd (4 weeks) to my dm ages ago. I had thought everything was covered by bubbles etc and all you could see was my dd and my hands. It wasn't until after I posted it on facebook that my dm decided to e-mail me to let me know that the photo showed my nipple! I have never yanked a photo off facebook faster!

HidingFromTheDM · 04/10/2009 10:18

and no YANBU!

thedollshouse · 04/10/2009 10:18

Your mum is a bit weird but then I find a lot of people of that generation have weird ideas about decency.

Having said that I wouldn't let anyone show a picture of me in the bath and have been surprised at how many new parents are prepared to share their naked bath shots with you if there is a baby in tow. Obviously have more body confidence than me.

I never shared a bath with ds until he was about 3 and didn't really find it very comfortable so I don't make a habit of it. I like to bathe in a darkened room with candles and a glass of bubbly and I like the water very hot whereas ds has it lukewarm.

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