This'll probably be long... sorry.....
We usually host Christmas at our house, we haven't got a big family and we have the only children. It's usually my parents, my Pil, my single Sil and us, so 7 adults 2 dcs. It's not easy, my dad can be a pain in the backside and we usually have some sort of row, my Pil's are very elderly and quite honestly it's hard work and expensive.
We've done this for the last 9 years!
This year has been bloody awful,... our business is seriously suffering in the recession, we've got money worries galore. We've had no holiday or time off with the boys. I worked all through the sumer holidays and didn't spend any quality time with them at all. On top of that Pil's aren't in the best of health. They moved to be near us a few years ago and there is no other family locally so they come to us every sunday.
I seriously cannot cope with a big Christmas this year, I haven't got the time, the money or the inclination to do it. I just want to sit down with my children and dh to enjoy it for once without cooking, cleaning and running round like a blue arsed fly.
Also, 2 weeks before Christmas is my Pil's 60th wedding anniversary which has been in the planning for 18months (by Mil)
I've also had to give loads of time and attention to this as since it was first organised Mil has had a couple of strokes and Fil has cancer.
If we get to this anniversary with them in one piece it will be a miracle.
My mum is lovely, she adores her grandchildren and doesn't see them as often as she would like as she lives about 3 hours away. I knew she wouldn't be happy about Christmas but when I told her a couple of days ago she said she understood...
So today I get in, message from mum.... I want to talk to you about Christmas or rather the lack of...
I phone her to get an absolute tirade of abuse, I'm so mean, so selfish, how could I deprive her of the highlight of the year, she hasn't been able to sleep because of it, I must have blackmailed the dc's to agree to this...
I said, I understood she was upset, but I've done Xmas for 9 years now and I'd like a year off to enjoy my children before they hit teenagedom!
It descended into a huge blazing row, she used everything she could think of,.. including how could I do this to the Pil's....well not being funny, they have 2 children other than DH, one of them could have them. They come to us every week!
I am soooo angry and so upset.. she has mad me feel like a guilty piece of shit!
There's no way on earth I'm hosting Christmas now...
and in all honesty I can't be bothered to speak to her either.
AIBU?