To get ds1 to start doing a few chores?

[tillyfernackerpants]

All I ask him to do is to tidy up his toys (every day), put his & ds2's dishes in the sink (most days) and then maybe one other job that we do together, eg putting clothes away or helping me in the garden.

I think this its good for them to learn responsibilities & is good training for when he's married, especially as I have a dh who is useless around the house, mil let him get away with not doing anything . But a friend told me she thought I was being harsh on ds1 asking him to do anything.

So, AIBU?

lol what's the point in getting him to do it if he makes all the clothes a mess

It's vital that boys don't get the impression that girls were put on the earth to be their slaves. I am regularly horrified at the uselessness of some people's husbands or partners - one would die of thirst before making a cup of coffee, for example.

I'm not a great believer in huge lists of chores just for the sake of it but simple tasks done as a team is a great basis for the independent men you'll hope to turn out into the world.

My dss (despite ds2 grumbling mightily at my refusal to let him live a Life of Grime) just got on with helping by the time they were teenagers. A job made easier, I am sure, from them starting early!

YANBU how else will they learn to live with other people or independently.
Kids gotta learn that every one in teh family has roles to play in the smooth running of the house.
My 3 yr old DS is responsible for laying table with cutlery for dinner and getting breakfast cereal & spoons out in morning. He also helps cook* and wash up some days and tidies with me when asked. He will sometimes help me with weeding and watering in garden and likes "helping" with cycle maintenance tasks.

• he is very good at mashing potato