To let DD1 miss 3 months of school to go and film??

[LovingTheRain]

DD1 has been told she's got the part for something she auditioned for recently. It would mean her being out of school for three 3months ( and maybe more if it runs over).

She will be tutored on set so she won't actually miss out on her education. She's just started year 7 at secondary school.
The school have agreed that she can have the time off and are going to liaise with the tutors on set so that she stays up to date with everything.

We've accepted the part and contracts etc are being sorted out at the moment.

AIBU to let her do this? As long as she's happy etc then that's all I care about, but part of me can't help feeling that she's too young to be away from home for 3 months. ( We will get to see her during that time but she won't actually be home for more than 1/2 days at a time).
She'll be chaperoned with the other children who are part of it so she won't be on her own but No idea who by or whether they'll be nice, but I have been assured they will be 'lovely' and are CRB checked

Feeling a bit teary which is stupid I know. If I didn't have three other DCs I would go with her but I can't

AIBU for having a tiny part of me not wanting her to go??

She will love it - let her go. Other kids her own age, chaperoned and doing an experience that she wants to do. It is only for 3 months, you will get to see her. I appreciate how hard this is for you to have her go off but it will be an amazing experience - what a lucky and talented daughter you have.

tiff, I think there was a poster called "sickoftherain" who was in somewhat challenging circumstances

oh bloody hell,yes,just checked!!

it was sickofthisrain.

so sorry!!!

Definitely let her go if she wants to.

DS1 had a part in a teen soap from Year 6 to Year 11 and he loved every minute of it. I know it is different as he wasn't away but he did miss an awful lot of school. He learned a lot from it and although he doesn't want to carry on as an actor he will probably end up in the industry. He left home on Monday for Uni in London to study Film Studies. The chaperones are great (if sometimes strict); she will make loads of friends, she will gain in confidence, however she will have to work long hours, have early starts and have a lot of boring hanging around - if she has done any filming before she will know this. Is it TV or feature film? I would certainly have allowed DS1 to go away to do a part if it had come up. He got down to the final few for a major part in a film once but it never happened.

motheroftwoboys - sounds exciting. My knowledge of teen soaps is limited, the only one that comes to mind is Grange Hill

DD1 is definatly going to go She's quite used to the boring hanging around business - Her and DD3 were involved with filming over the summer but I was able to go with them and it was for a much shorter time!

didn't realise how many grins there was there. Sorry!

I used to be in Grange Hill! Loved it

How exciting for your dd, yanbu at all

To posters who suggested the op could go too, this is not always possible unless they are a chaperone themselves. My dd does bits like this, she is only 8 so I have become a licensed chaperone so I can accompany her.
Fwiw, I have been CRBed, interviewed, and sent on a child protection course. Chaperones are pretty hands on, always with their charges, and in loco parentis. No chance for Drew Barrymore style shenanigans.

She will have a fab time and it will be an amazing experience.
for your dd.

You must let her do it ! Its a chance of a lifetime.
My friends sons have done it repeatedly and totally loved it . The chaperones totally spoiled the kids . One or two of their chaperones kept in touch for years afterwards.
One of her sons kept it up and is still in the "biz" now at 22 .
Congrats to DD

Personally what I would do i think would be to spend as much time with her as possible eg Mon - Fri or perhaps Fri - Mon. For this 3 month period personally I would want my DH stepping up to care for the other kids and call in the family help that you mention

I would not let my 10 or 11 year old be away with a chaperone for 3 months at a time. No matter how good, or how CRB checked.

I too am a licensed chaperone although so far I have only ever worked in theatre, not on a film set.

We have to go through a rigorous vetting procedure by the LEA Education Welfare Officer, I had to be interviewed a CRB, two written references then go on a traning day to make sure we all knew all the rules and regs regarding childrne and performing, how they are looked after, what hours they can do etc.

My local LEA says he does not like it when parents are theri own childs chaperones as they often don't know all the rules. A parent is legallyentitled to chaperone their own child, but not any other child on set so it is often too difficult to have individual parent chaperones anyway.

that's all very well with the rules and regs and islandofsodor I'm sure you are utterly brilliant - but my point is I would want to parent my 11 year old for at least the majority of the time for that long 3 month period.

Yes it may make the LEA man's life easier if parents aren't chaperones but I think that's not a consideration that should weigh much in whether a child has a parent with them for 3 months or not!

ONly an individual parent can make that decision knowing their child. I would let my dd do it at the age the OP's dd is, however I decided not to allow her to audition for the Sound of Music Tour.

Also it depends on how far way you live etc. If the children are put up in a hotel you can book in with them and have charge of them when not on set or being tutored. They generally are only allowed to film so many days per week, can't remember off the top of my head how many so it is possible to see as much of them as you would if they were at school.

it is whilst actually on set that is is difficult to be a parent chaperone if there are multiple children. It is not so much about making peoples lives easier, but ensuring the wellbeing of all the children. Unfortunately, and not saying at all it would be so in this case, it is parents who allow their children to do things when they shouldn't for example feeling ill, under too much pressure, exeeding their hours as sometimes they get a bit too star struck.

twirlymum!

Is there a single woman in her 30s/40s who didn't long to be in Grange hill at some point?

OOh I want to know who you were on GH TM.

and me, and me! Or were you random child slouching along corridors with perm and undone tie?

Where you annette?

Or Imelda?

Neither, I'm afraid, just a lowly extra, but it was great fun. Did loads of other shows too. Not great money, but experiences I'll remember forever.

Chaperone rules and regs have changed recently - or certainly in the authority that I live in. Parents are no longer allowed to be a chaperone unless they are on the "register" ie crbd and trained and then they are employed and scheduled like any other. You can't just look after your own child.

Thst is just the decision of your LEA then mother. A paren is still legally able to chaperone their own child (my renewal training was only in the summer) but they are not allowed to be with the other children which backstage/on set is a logistical nightmare.

Thank you for your advice all!

It has all gone absolutely mad. AT the theatre where I work children are not allowed to go to the loo unless accompanied by a chaperone - even if the parents are there to take them - and then the chaperone has to trail all the other children along with them too. That's interesting island - so do you have to do timings etc just for your own child?

You have to keep a schedule for the licence holder (production company)in case the LEA calls the records in, is that what you mean.

Whenever possible I get someone else to chaperone my child as it is more professional but it is not always possible if there is a small group.