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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Pls give me yoour thoughts re sharing car to work and petrol money.

68 replies

jellyjelly · 10/09/2009 18:01

I give a lift to a girl that I work with every day there and back. I used to charge her £15 per week which is a good deal as its about half for petrol and she would be paying about £23 at the time for train and would have to leave about 50 mins earlier and it would take her longer.

I then charged her £20 which was fairer as petrol went up and I was using more to get to work.

Obviously petrol has gone up since she is still saving money and getting a lift.

I have started to give a lift to another girl and she is happy to pay the same as she is still saving money for her its about £17 a week. The first girl makes us late everyday and we are waiting for her.

The petrol is being split about 3 ways, I have been paying a little less but I pay for increased car insurance and tyres and other car stuff. I know its my choice to drive but I really dont have to take them at all. I make a bit of cash but not alot and they save money. She also makes me late most days to pick up my son. I could get out of work most days by about 30 minutes.

Anyway the first girl has gone behind my back to the other and asked what she was paying which is fair enough but was underhand about it and wants it split further down.

The second girl understands and it totally cool about the costs. (She might stay at work long term and the first one definately is staying)

I dont think even if her husbnad took her to work (he is not working at the moment) that she could do it cheaper.

I dont want to lose the money but I cant really adjust it further or at all.

What do you think? AIBU or not?

OP posts:

arolf · 10/09/2009 18:26

lady stealth - yes.

if you're doing all the driving, plus paying for the upkeep of the car, I think it's totally reasonable not to pay for the fuel too. that's how any lift shares I've been involved in run. also, it will cover your costs if one of them can't travel, for whatever reason.

Original poster

jellyjelly · 10/09/2009 18:27

Where you left it - always been a problem the lateness. Annoys me.

OP posts:

shonaspurtle · 10/09/2009 18:30

You'll certainly be running at a loss if they both go off and make other arrangements.

Any lift shares I've done have always been an equal split and the driver usually gets a bottle or something to say thanks periodically.

The lateness thing is unacceptable but easily sorted.

meemarsgotabrandnewbump · 10/09/2009 18:30

jellyjelly your perception of this is all wrong.

You don't want to be taken for a ride, but at the same time you seem happy to profiteer from your colleagues.

You are pissed off at this colleague but you don't want to get rid of her because in actual fact she is an earner for you.

It sounds like karma to me

WhereYouLeftIt · 10/09/2009 18:31

arolf - I've been the driver on a lift-share and I divided the petrol costs between us all, me included. I'd have been making the journey anyway, their share reduced my costs but I still expected to pay my share of the petrol too.

And, not to be too anal about it, I worked out my mpg, how many miles the round trip was, and how much the journeys cost per week on a spreadsheet and printed it out for everyone so that they could know how I'd arrived at that number! It was important to me that they knew this .

LadyStealthPolarBear · 10/09/2009 18:32

fair enough! I personally wouldn't do that but on the other hand if I was one of the others I'd be happy to pay the £20 and the 'extra' would be to pay for being taxied as well as the extra costs of running the car. Especially if they're being picked up and dropped off at the door.

PrincessToadstool · 10/09/2009 18:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PrincessToadstool · 10/09/2009 18:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

purpleduck · 10/09/2009 18:34

And I presume you use the car to pick up your child, do errands along the way. so you are in effect getting your colleague to pay for your costs.

Doen't matter what THEY would have to pay if they took the train, etc - if thats your concern perhaps you should think about a career as a taxi driver.

They are paying £40, you are paying £7

your share should include petrol.

shame

LilRedWG · 10/09/2009 18:35

Blimey - running at a profit. Someone who gave DH a lift for a couple of months refused money so DH bought him a satnav which equated to about the same monetary value.

TBH I think that you are being a tad greedy.

arolf · 10/09/2009 18:36

whereyou leftit - I also calculated how much the journey would cost, and explained it to them. Admittedly, it was only a fiver of fuel a day, which split between 2 passengers was less than half the equivalent train fare. (so when I had a full car of 4 passengers, it was a real bargain for them) I made sure the calculation ONLY included the journey to and from work - not any extra travel I was doing in the car. 47 quid a week on fuel to and from work seems like an awful lot to be honest, jellyjelly - how far are you travelling?! I was doing a 25 minute journey down the motorway in each direction. Plus which, I had the option to work from home if I needed to, so I wouldn't necessarily be driving in anyway. None of my colleagues have cars, which is why I drove them.
also, other liftshares I've done have been with family, so maybe that's why we did the 'driver doesn't pay for fuel' thing. but it seems the fairest option to me.

welshdeb · 10/09/2009 18:36

If you are making a profit you may find you have invalidated your insurance if you only have social domestic and commuting cover.

Original poster

jellyjelly · 10/09/2009 18:36

I didnt know if i was being unreasonable. It might be for 3 more weeks or longer.

Thankyou for your views they are appreciated. It is good to see the other side. I can adjust my rates now.

OP posts:

LadyStealthPolarBear · 10/09/2009 18:40

np jellyjelly!
I can see both sides. If I was getting a lift I'd pay what I thought was more than my share, but if I was the driver I wouldn't expect it. But I've only ever lift shared with friends, not colleagues.

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 10/09/2009 18:40

Do they know how much petrol costs? Or how much you spend? I don't think it's unreasonable for you to pay slightly less than they do, but you sound like you are ripping them off a tiny bit. Is it right that she paid 20 when there were only two of you, and now she and the other girl both pay 20? I'd be a bit about that too. I think if you fill up 47 a week petrol it's not unreasonable to split it 18, 18, 11 at the most, and if she complains tell her petrol has gone up (true)
Also tell her she needs to be on time or you will reevaluate the arrangement. She would have to be on time for public transport and pay more, and it wouldn't kill you to lose her from the arrangement if you are driving anyway.

Original poster

jellyjelly · 10/09/2009 18:41

The lateness
Teh backstabbing and underhandness
The expectance.
She wanted me to go out of my way to accomodate her in wet/bad weather when I cant at all.

OP posts:

ObsidianBlackbirdMcNight · 10/09/2009 18:44

I would split it equally three ways personally though. And even with family we still share fuel costs equally per person.

purpleduck · 10/09/2009 18:50

"She wanted me to go out of my way to accomodate her in wet/bad weather when I cant at all".

In what way?
Sounds like you need to set some boundaries

GeekIsGood · 10/09/2009 18:52

I don't think the OP should have to pay for petrol as she is providing the car. She's not getting a free ride is she, she's paying fully for everything to do with the car (cost of buying it, road tax, insurance, MOT, maintenance and repairs) plus doing the driving.

If she didn't take the other two they would presumably have to buy their own cars or spend a fortune on train travel. They are hardly being ripped off.

YABU to be annoyed about the woman's lateness too, you need to tell her you won't wait that long.

Original poster

jellyjelly · 10/09/2009 18:53

One day she asked if i could pick her up in bad weather ie snow/hail. I said I couldnt then turned it on me when it snowed saying that she thought I had agreed to pick her up.

FWIW its 8.50 for her to catch the train.

OP posts:

Podrick · 10/09/2009 18:54

I think you should ask your colleagues to pay one third each of the full cost of transport. This would include a contribution towards insurance, road tax, repairs and maintenance and so it will be significantly more than just the petrol costs. To work out your other costs, add them all up for a 1 year period and divide by your expected annual mileage. This will give you a cost per mile for your non-petrol costs. Add in your petrol costs per mile and you have your full cost per mile. Multiply by the mileage for the journey and divide by 3. This is the what to charge the others

This is not profiteering and it is quite easily justifiable to the others. Show them your calculation. This rate is not "making a profit" from the others.

These people are colleagues, not friends or family so it is fair to charge them the full cost. People who are suggesting you only charge 1/3 the petrol are not being fair to you as the driver and car owner imo. After all you are not charging them a fee for doing the driving whilst they sit back and relax in your car, and you are driving out of your way adding exta time to your journey to pick them up. I think waiting more than 5 mins on a regular basis for one of them is frankly ridiculous and you are ill advised to accept this situation.

LadyStealthPolarBear · 10/09/2009 18:56

hmm but if what you're saying is she's only doing all this to take the three of them to work then after a certain length of time they could claim that the money over what they paid for their share of fuel was going towards the car, and so have a stake in it!

shonaspurtle · 10/09/2009 19:01

Doesn't sound like jelly is going out of her way though - isn't this the extra that she can't do?

Podrick's idea is good, although of course you would be paying the full cost of your insurance/tax whether you were driving your car or not. Not having a contribution towards this does not strictly leave you out of pocket.

Podrick · 10/09/2009 19:01

What would happen if you refused to have sex with your dh and gave as the reason "because he undermines your confidence?"

I also have to say that if he is refusing to have sex with you on whatever dubious pretext it is more than likely he is getting it elsewhere.

LadyStealthPolarBear · 10/09/2009 19:02

lol Podrick that's rather persona; for a car sharing thread

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