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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to dread collecting my "three o clock monster" from school?

46 replies

Flyonthewindscreen · 08/09/2009 14:32

So depressing after six weeks of having Mr chilled out around (aka my DS, 7yr old, yr 3), now it is back to collecting the bad tempered moody man from the school gates. Any enquiry as to his day met with a grunted "it was normal". It usually takes about 30 minutes after getting home before he stops being foul...

He has always been like this on being collected (he has friends and rather to my surprise is apparently generally nicely behaved in school and is learning well so I'm not too concerned that he has spent the day being miserable). Why do the other parents standing next to you at school gates always seem to have happy beaming chatty DC returned to them?

OP posts:

hotpotmama · 08/09/2009 22:41

Loving "shurrup poohead" . If only adults could say what they were thinking too!!

Relieved that its not just me that gets lovely responses like that!

Have started walking home with them (half an hour) and think the exercise helps them (and a snack).

seeker · 08/09/2009 22:50

"bonkers boy" Oh,TsarChasm - I have a bonkers boy too. It really is the only possible description, isn't it? And eh has two friends who often come home with him - bonkers boy cubed!

TsarChasm · 08/09/2009 23:06

Ah yes... bonkers-boy plus bonkers-boy friend for tea. I have to steel myself for that.

(As opposed to bonkers boy-friend which is another thread entirely of course)

Discomonkfish · 08/09/2009 23:20

Glad I stumbled across this thread...my dd started school end of last week..she was excited, we were excited...she comes home like the exorcist...poor ds is trying to play with her after missing her all day and she gets really frustrated with him too...I am going to try the food / drink and chill out definitely.....think she needs time to wind down

dreamteamgirl · 08/09/2009 23:26

Oooh SO fab to see this one

DS starts school on Thursday, and I had my suspicions it was going to be bad ...

Will arrive with juice & banana and see if it helps, thanks for the tips!!

legspinner · 09/09/2009 08:01

This thread is fun- helps to know I'm not alone
For my kids its definitely food-related. For the last few years (!) I've been bringing crackers to school for them so they can have something before we go home (esp if we are walking). However all their friends have cottoned on that I'm the cracker woman so I sometimes get 5 or 6 kids round me begging for food!!!!

BonsoirAnna · 09/09/2009 08:16

After lots of experiments with different snacks, I now take a carton of Innocent juice (strawberries and raspberries), a banana and a small bottle of water for DD after school. She is desperately thirsty after school and in need of some sugar, but definitely not the biscuit and cake kind.

broccoliandchips · 09/09/2009 08:59

They defo need a drink, snack and 'time on their own/chill out/TV time' after a day at school. Afterall, we need time to wind down after work don't we? Incidentally, when I was teaching, I used to have a boy in my class who was soooooo good in school that when his mum picked him up he just used to let rip! At parents evening she was talking about her 'nightmare child' and I really didn't have a clue who she was talking about. He was an angel in class.

stealthsquiggle · 09/09/2009 09:07

It's definitely a matter of hydration with DS. If forced to sit down and drink water he improves immeasurably, and on the (rare) days when he comes out of school with an empty water bottle I know I have a fighting chance of a normal conversation.

fishie · 09/09/2009 09:14

ds isn't starting school till january but i am already getting quite worried about this. he sometimes gets very bad low blood sugar.

he will be staying to school lunch but i am concerned he will need refuelling at some point before 3.30 but will have no opportunity and will have meltdown instead.

twinsagogo · 09/09/2009 09:57

i'm keeping my (reception) twins at home on wednesdays to avoid meltdowns. still getting a lot a trouble in the eves but i recon it would be worse if they were doing 5 days. ps "you're a poo poo head" is also my DS favourite insult.

MilaMae · 09/09/2009 10:54

Twins my twins were in Rec last Sep-you have my sympathies!!!!!!! DD has started this week. The twins have elevated from vileness to low grade grumpiness now they are Y1 however dd has just started rec so I have the joys of her face of thunder to contend with too now!!!!!!!!

Last year I took cookies to the school gate and literally rammed them in the minute they came out-it really helped.

I read a post from one Mumsnetter who recommended taking the TV remote so you can switch it on through the window as they come up the path thus heading off the meltdowns which occur once the shoes are off inside. She was posting in jest but I have to say I did actually consider it 1 week,you may wish to do so too.

lingle · 09/09/2009 11:15

What I want to know is, since they kidnapped the adorable 6-year-old I spent the summer holidays with and swapped him for the mutant replica monster that came out of school on Monday afternoon, where have they put my son? Is he in the school building still ready to be returned to me at Christmas? Or do schools have some kind of portal? And where do they keep the replica children over the summer holidays? Is there a special storeroom? Is this why they are always complaining about lack of storage space?

NNMum · 09/09/2009 11:27

I agree with food and drink as I used to have a boyfriend who became horrible when hungry/thirsty and when got badtempered would feed him for improved version. However would also recommend finding a time (if there is one) when they are calm and happy and explain how you feel when they are so badtempered after school. Poss agree a compromise with them ie no questions about school or no talking for first half hr.

Pyrocanthus · 09/09/2009 11:50

fishie - Your DS might be much better able to cope by January. My DD2 used to be susceptible to plummeting blood sugar levels, but the only time she really had a problem in reception was when the coach was delayed on the way back from a school trip. She was too tired to eat when she got home, and ran behind the sofa weeping, where she fell asleep. Be in the playground with provisions each afternoon.

oregonianabroad · 09/09/2009 13:24

PSML at milamae and the remote. so tempting!

fruitful · 09/09/2009 14:37

Hmm, hadn't thought about hydration - might greet them in the playground with a drink as well as a snack for the walk home!

Ds1 has just started reception. His friend, who lives a couple of doors down, has too. Neighbour-child comes out of school all angelic and sociable, asking if ds1 can come back to play, or just wanting to chat to him on the walk home. Ds1 says "go away I don't like you I'm NEVER coming to play with you go away not talking to YOU" or something of that ilk in tones of deepest contempt. Every day. Sigh. Angelic-neighbour-child keeps persevering. I keep explaining that ds1 will want to be friends again tomorrow morning ...

Fortunately dd (7) is usually willing to chat!

moodlumthehoodlum · 09/09/2009 14:53

This is one of those reassuring threads that make you realise that you are not alone.

The 3.30 to 4.30 witching hour is awful, and it will only be more awful when ds starts school tomorrow.

I've also found that whilst TV is gooood at that time of day, Horrid Henry on CITV at that time of day is Baaaaad, and you can have too much na na na na naa naaaa at that time of day. So whilst mine are still happy to watch gentle Cbeebies, I shall be sticking with that..

PoptyPing · 09/09/2009 16:35

fishie They will probably have a mid-afternoon fruit snack - they do at our school.

My DS is as fannybanjo describes - shattered but unable to go to sleep before about 10.30ish (despite being sent to bed a 8 last night because of his appalling behaviour). I'm going to have to think of strategies to help him to wind down - maybe banning TV and computer after dinner (which isn't going to be popular).

He's also as broccoli says - extremely good at school. We honestly thought the teacher was describing a different child when we went to our first parent's evening, because he was behaving like a banshee the momeht he left the classroom (he's not routinely horrible now thankfully, just on special occasions ).

deepbreath · 09/09/2009 16:51

Thank you for starting this thread. I was made the unofficial entertainment in the playground on the first day back after the holidays by my 6 and 7 year olds screaming at each other and at me

One of the Dads smirked at me because my ds (7!) had a face like thunder... the Dad's reception aged child was walking along chatting happily! If the Mums looked, I didn't notice. I think they were feeling my pain!

I had taken raisins and cereal type bars, but clearly didn't hand them over quickly enough!

Morloth · 09/09/2009 19:02

This is where our 20 minute walk to/from school comes in handy. DS doesn't want to talk. He usually wants a drink, maybe a snack and enjoys the walk. Sometimes we stop at the park if weather permits and nowhere to be. By the time we get home he is back to his sunny self.

It is our "warm up" time in the morning as well, we chat and stroll.

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