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AIBU?

To think it's really, really distasteful to dress up as a 'sexy schoolgirl'?

136 replies

waitingforfanjo · 26/08/2009 23:36

It's not that I'm a prude or anything. I've done it myself in my twenties several times (for a party, not ahem private titillation)

It's just lately since I've had my own child, and with so much public awareness of paedophilia and its apparent standing as THE crime people hate most, it just seems to grate on me that people can think it's still ok to sexualise what is essentially a child's outfit.

I suppose what I'm trying to say (but not very well) is that it's a bit like dressing as a Nazi for a party. It's not funny because of all the bad connotations & just not the 'done' thing.( but not quite the same, IYSWIM)

I am probably BU, but it just makes me feel a bit 'eew!'

OP posts:
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morningpaper · 27/08/2009 14:26

You could use this argument for absolutely ANY fetish!

Women who like pilots = getting off on authority therefore enjoying female subservience therefore BAD

Men who like nurse's outfits = getting off on traditional role of women as subservient therefore BAD

Are there any fetishes that would be okay because they are outside any social narrative? Would bubble-wrap be acceptable?

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JemL · 27/08/2009 14:26

I do understand the argument that dressing up in school uniform normalises the notion that young girls are sexual beings. I just don't know if I agree with it. WHat does it mean to normalise it; that we will all think it is ok to abuse children?! Or that paedophiles will think that it shows that they are the normal ones, and that society is repressing them? Becuase surely paedophiles are the way they are irrespective of what is culturally considered sexy, or fetishized?

The men who find adult women dressed up as schoolgirls sexy, and the men that find young girls sexy are going to be very different people.

Also I thought the idea behind schoolwear role play was not to emulate little girls but older teenagers - not that I am an expert, and not that this makes it completely fine!

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AMumInScotland · 27/08/2009 14:26

I do understand the point - if you in any way "normalise" schoolgirls/sex then paedophiles will use this as an excuse. But I don't think we should all change our behaviour on the basis of what sick people might use it to justify.

It's the same argument as "she was wearing a short skirt, so was gagging for it, so not rape" - as long as we allow the behaviour of men like that to stop us from wearing short skirts in case we get raped, we are allowing them to control our behaviour.

If it isn't this it will be something else which women or children do which will be used as an excuse. And we have to say "no excuses!"

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morningpaper · 27/08/2009 14:29

Do you think that the St. Trinian's thing is the fetishisation of vulnerability?

It is the fetishisation of teenagers, which I would imagine in pretty much every culture is pretty bloody NORMAL and can hardly be described as a fetish at all

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GreensleevesFlouncedLikeAKnob · 27/08/2009 14:31

rather a large difference between dressing in a short skirt and dressing up as a child for the purpose of titillation though

nobody is saying "wearing a short skirt implies that women in short skirts are sexy

but dressing in school uniforms certainly normalises the notion that school-aged girls are sexy

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PitysSake · 27/08/2009 14:32

greeny i am leavign you too it
have made case
sorry
feel like pissing about somewhere theough if you fancy it

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dittany · 27/08/2009 14:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

oneopinionatedmother · 27/08/2009 14:34

I once loved dressing up, and that includes dressing up in 'kinky' outfits (TO GO OUT). Though I think its a bit of a case of getting it right...do 'schoolgirl' right and you can look more retro-punk and classy, do it wrong and look like a £10 hooker who's trying too hard.
I used to like to do 'goth vixen' (corset, velvet boots, studded collar) which looked like the 'evil' ballet dancer whilst svelte. Would look more like the hippo from Fantasia now though Still, glad i can look back on having been naughty once.

If a bloke wants to dress up looking like something women perv over (pirate? Mr Darcy? James Bond?) they don't suffer the same accusation of gender-traitorship.

So long as your behaviour is not that of simpering sex-object, dress whatever way you like.

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morningpaper · 27/08/2009 14:35

Were the Page 3 girls creepy for the entirity of the 80s when they were all about 16? Or is it only looking back that they seem creepy?

Just about every model in every advert is a teenager - is this creepy?

Just about every woman in every edition of

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GreensleevesFlouncedLikeAKnob · 27/08/2009 14:36

I think perving over pirates/policemen/whatever is VERY different from perving over little girls

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dittany · 27/08/2009 14:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Morloth · 27/08/2009 14:40

hmmm so what do we think about men who like to dress as school girls then?

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oneopinionatedmother · 27/08/2009 14:40

would i be a perv if i pulled someone dressed as a 'cheeky schoolboy'??

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SolidGoldBrass · 27/08/2009 14:41

What about ANgus Young, though? There are women (and men tbh) who fancy the short grey pants off him, are they all latent peedafils?

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morningpaper · 27/08/2009 14:42

lol dittany I'm not advocating lads mags

But they feature teenagers - pretty much all their cover models are teenagers. It isn't pathological to fancy teenagers. It's normal.

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Morloth · 27/08/2009 14:44

oneopinionatedmother I was just thinking that.

I hope none of the posters who are saying that it normalises paedophilia were amongst the group on here lusting over Taylor Lautner the 16 year old (now 17) who was in Twilight. Now that creeped me out.

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morningpaper · 27/08/2009 14:46

or that Daniel Radcliff

He was only 20 two weeks ago

You bunch of pervs

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PitysSake · 27/08/2009 14:52

i have never perved over a bespectacled boy wizard

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GetOrfMoiLand · 27/08/2009 15:44

By PitysSake on Thu 27-Aug-09 14:52:11
i have never perved over a bespectacled boy wizard

LOL!

Anyway, what sums it up for me is, if my DP asked me to dress up for nefarious purposes in the following costumes my reactions would be:

Naughty nurse - fine
Stockings and suspenders - fine
French maid - fine
Sponge Bob Square Pants - (after a moment's thought) - fine
Sexy schoolgirl - sick twat

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oneopinionatedmother · 27/08/2009 15:47

sponge bob..can barely type for the laughter...

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WebDude · 27/08/2009 15:55

Sorry, Greensleeves, but I'm pretty sure that it's not 'little girls' but 'buxom girls' that men find a turn-on, so they're going to be "upper 6th" and of legal age (not that I'd be encouraging anyone under 20 to get involved with someone more than a few years older).

As a male, I can see concern but would consider it better aimed at girls under 18 wearing /having a Playboy Bunny motif on anything, whether it is a pencil case or a T-shirt.

I see the schoolgirl / cheerleader look as just one variation away from police woman, nurse, horsewoman (in tight jodhpurs), maid, nun that might fuel a man's fantasy.

(The nun mention was only in connection with a vicars and nuns party, you understand! I was brought up R.C. and had no naughty thoughts about any of the nuns who taught me.)

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morningpaper · 27/08/2009 15:56

GetOrfMoiLand: so school-girl is sick but a homosexual talking sponge is fine?

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wahwahwah · 27/08/2009 16:04

And dressing up as sexy nurses too. So many nurses I know have been groped and propositioned and blame the whole uniform dress up thing on it.

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WebDude · 27/08/2009 16:13

Morloth - re men dressing as school girls (or women, or babies in nappies)... Well, it's certainly not my scene, but if they are not doing any harm to anyone else, and doing what they're doing in privacy (so no one else needs to know), I doubt there's anything illegal, it just seems a bit yukkie.

GetOrfMoiLand I could accept the 'sick twat' idea if he wanted you to appear pubescent, but surely there will be some in school at a very similar age to the new university intake and you're saying it'd be sick if the image were taken from one place, while in the other everyone is treated as an adult (even if some are still v immature!)

So is it the costume part that makes you think '13' and me think '18' ?

It seems to me to be partly the 'image' one is conjuring up of being a 'schoolgirl'.

Sure, if I was tempted by anyone under 16 I'd be in trouble, and as I'm a terrible judge of ages, I doubt I would approach any female below 20 (in truth, somewhat higher to know there's a chance of me liking similar music, films, etc, and to know they would have experience of life, travel, food, etc)

Thinking of the elder girls in the St Trinians films, are you saying that dressing up as a senior girl would still be a 'sick' wish?

Just trying to understand ...

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WebDude · 27/08/2009 16:15

Yes, can understand nurses not being happy. Nor some staff in hotels, when they are just doing their job, and get unwanted approaches.

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