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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think this could be a typical Mumsnet thread?

56 replies

oneopinionatedmother · 25/08/2009 15:19

DistressedofDorking

Oh no! Please help, every morning DD wails her head off like she?s being killed. She?s 12 mo and sleeps in her own room. I am still BF her and pg with DC2, so to help me out DH gets her out of bed to bring her for her morning feed (lovely DH). But the screams every morning are just so distressing ? our neighbours mentioned about it the other day. Please help, I really don?t need this as am feeling hormonal
My HV has said I should stop BF and give her a bottle last thing instead as she is yelling because she is waking up starving 
My MIL thinks I should be getting out of bed and not expecting DH to deal with this
DH thinks she is just being funny and I shouldn?t worry about it, she will grow out of it.

Mumsnorks ? Is there any way she could co-sleep? Then when she woke up the lovely booby would be right there to comfort her. Don?t listen to HV?s, they are all evil witches from Mars, out to deprive your baby out of the good stuff. Also your MIL is probably just jealous cos her husband never helped her out.
Waitingforfanjo ? Don?t worry about this lovely, babies just yell sometimes. God knows mine blow the house down when they wake up all tired and grumpy. Your DH is being lovely and helping you out. If you want to wean totally, you could, but I honestly think it won?t make the blindest bit of difference.
Interventionistsanonymous ? Congrats on your pregnancy! Also you do have a lovely DH, mine wouldn?t do so much as get me a cup of the tea I?m so horrendously addicted to. Baby could be suffering from MSS (morning screaming syndrome) so you should see your GP for a referral to a specialist. When I did it made such a difference ? the therapy really worked and baby is so much better.
Mumsnorks ? MSS new one on me.
Icewitch ? don?t worry about it. Nothing?s wrong, you?re just fragile because you?re pg. Have a large G n T and feel better.
DesperateofDorking ? ok, I went to see the Doctor and he said nothing was wrong, he hadn?t heard of MSS but referred me to the specialist anyway. Any other ideas? Don?t want to co-sleep as uncomfortable enough with bump and 12 monther makes a very kicky sleeping partner.
@icewitch ? large GnT ? at that time in the morning? Whilst pregnant?
TheDailyMailblowsdonkeys ? Are you sure your DH isn?t a child abuser?

[grin emoticon]
TokenMan ? Why are you alleging abuse TDMBD? You are being anti male unnecessarily. The nice man does something to help his pregnant wife and instantly someone alleges something totally unsubstantiated.
TheDailyMailBlowsDonkeys - >sighs impatiently at lack of irony detection in some people<
Desperateofdorking ? not sure if you?re being tongue in cheek but i think DD might be upset that it?s not me that gets her out of bed, I?ll try being there tomorrow morning. >sulky tired emoticon<

Icewitch ? oh sorry OP didn?t read that bit of your post...just thought I?d offer some assurance without reading anything.
Tombliboobs ? does she sleep with a toy? Mine used to cry every morning when she got out because I wouldn?t let her take all fifteen of her furry toys with her. Needless to say they go with her to breakfast to now, all cuddled up with her in the high chair. No more yelling. >indulgent parent emoticon<
Mumsnorks ? let us know how it goes OP, we?re all ?nosy?keen to think putting in our tuppence has been useful and not just a waste of yet more minutes of our one unrepeatable life on the internet!
DesperateofDorking ? Wow! You?ll never guess what was the answer (no, you really won?t guess.)

OP posts:
oneopinionatedmother · 26/08/2009 09:07

ah feel free to jump in Tombliboobs (though i think i cast you as one of those super cuddly parents that have lovely undemanding children but still cater to their every whim.)

there's some milage in this one yet..no-one has told desperate to dump her DH/ see a consellor yet - and we are a long way off someone being called a Nazi (so no geffin's (sp?) law, though OOM's law has already been fulfilled, that is, on any parenting thread, sooner or later someone will advise they see a HCP (regardless of the nature of the complaint)

waves to waitingforfanjo<

my children need walking or at least i think that's what she means by bringing me her shoes and fleece in a little bundle and yelling.

OP posts:
CyradisTheSeer · 26/08/2009 09:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Dophus · 26/08/2009 10:32

Definietly more mileage - we havn't got onto the whole bf when pg and extended bf debate...

oneopinionatedmother · 26/08/2009 10:52

thanks to all for encouragement

wipes tear from eye, stands at podium and thanks all the little people

OP posts:
oneopinionatedmother · 26/08/2009 10:58

Applause emoticon]

DM should get you to write their column. Except, of course, you would never sell yourself out, obviously.

you give me too much credit, i'm not one of these people that are too good for the unpleasant, low down and dirty jobs

OP posts:
waitingforfanjo · 26/08/2009 13:10

waves back

Olifin · 26/08/2009 13:17

oneopinionatedmother

You are a very funny lady. I clicked on your name to look at your profile and momentarily thought you were actually me since we live in the same (small) town and are the same age! I wonder if I know you in RL?!

MummyElk · 26/08/2009 13:23

i'm 10 wks pg and earlier tried to understand quite HOW you managed to do this but the mental logistics outwitted me so i'm still just in awe of the thread...
(p.s. i do actually get HOW you did this, but it's the keeping across who wrote what where etc - i can't do it on "proper" threads let alone made up ones!)
anyway. Big Love.

OrmIrian · 26/08/2009 13:27

Brilliant!

oneopinionatedmother · 26/08/2009 15:40

Tombliboobs that's shocking. What an idiot he is, you must be absolutely livid and justifiably concerned about your children's welfare.
Have you considered going to a counsellor? We did that when DH carried on failing to replace the lid on the toothpaste tube. It totally repaired the rift in our relationships, we'd just reached the stage of being utterly bitter towards each other because of it. now our happy home is stronger than ever!

mumsnorks Was that the counsellor who advised you to get toothpaste in standing up tubes, by any chance?? They earned their £50 per hour and no mistake

MyMILisNannyOgg The 'dangling upside down' thing is something my MIL used to always push on me, she said it helped to get the blood out of their brain and back into their little legs for the day. Crazy of course! I made extra sure i picked them up bolt-upright every time she was there.

bumsexshouldbefreeontheNHS Congrats on your pregnancy. And I notice you HV told you stop BF! (obviously wrong) Can you make a formal complaint? I did when my HV suggested something trivial i was doing was not 100% normal. Totally justified.

MotherinLore I'd just like to say we didn't have parenting forums in our day, if we wanted advice we'd listen to our elders and betters. I dangled all eleven of my boys upside down every morning and it never did them any harm, in fact, i think it made them the strong upright men they are today.

unhingedminge @bumsex - >yech at your name< why shouldn't she stop BF? if she wants to that is? We don't all have to wait until our children have to stop because they are getting married and leaving home before weaning them.
@motherinlore
And just because putting them head down in the morning doesn't kill them, that doesn't make it ok, I would be worried more that I had chosen to have kids sharing the same DNA with this guy.
Dump him OP, you'll never look back.

politicallycorrectandlovingit Are you being a eugenicist, unhinged? Do you think because people lack common sense they produce defective children? My husband hasn't the merest puff of common sense and we have a lovely family of kids without the slightest touch of practicality between them. I love them so much I just can't bear to hear them criticised in any way. The standing on upturned garden rakes, discarded banana skins and finding the bath has overflowed gets to me occasionally, but it's still soo rewarding.

mumsnorks I think you're being a bit oversensitive politicallycorrect, i think unhinged was more worried that her DH was a danger to her kids due to the fact the ony brain cell he possesses is crying because it is all alone and the rest of him just does what his mother tells it.
and unhinged i think we might need to know a teeny bit more before we tell her to divorce the father of her children?

rubs desperates dh's sole braincell comfortingly on the back, hands it a handkerchief<

desperateofDorking

Oh, thank you for your responses ladies, you've been so helpful. I don't think counselling is for us, as I'd be terrified they'd take DD away from us [hysterical and paranoid emoticon] for being horrid parents.
But what should i do? He has gone off in a huff, and spoke to me whilst he was in the supermarket an hour ago but when i called back five minutes later to ask him to get baked beans (aren't pregnancy cravings weird?), he didn't pick up.

I feel so bad and am really wondering if i should have got so angry with him. I mean, its seems a silly thing to do, but I still love him. If i'd talked to him more maybe this wouldn't have happened, he wouldn't have felt obliged to go to his Mum for advice.

waitingforfanjo do you think its possible he might have gone out of reception, tends to be dodgy in supermarkets? At ours you have to stand on a trolley on one leg waving your phone around before you can get so much as one bar of reception.

You were right to be angry, he was being daft, but no-ones perfect - I think we've all done some daft things especially with our first children. Maybe just ask him never to do that again? And don't let the kids sleep over at MIL's until they're older.

cheer up lovey, have some cake healthy food and watch jeremy kyle a good film.

OP posts:
Dophus · 26/08/2009 16:26

I'm luvvin it

JonAndHateTheDailyMail · 26/08/2009 16:38

Brilliant!

oneopinionatedmother · 26/08/2009 20:42

TheDailyMailBlowsDonkeys @waitingforfanjo - the problem is, you're trying to get reception in a Tesco's. You'll get a much higher quality of phone signal in Waitrose..

unhingedminge @motherinlore I note you have eleven sons. They aren't playing for this football team by any chance? If i was their manager I'd dangle them upside down too....

TokenMan >hides head in shame<
that's not my team. Not at all.

slinks off to cry somewhere quiet<

desperateofdorking He's come back in and it was the phone reception. We had long quiet chat about it. He agreed he was wrong, though he thinks I am too stressed over something minor and over-reacting. He did apologise though, and had brought me the baked beans without being asked. He really is a sweetheart. Though he did make a comment about me being overtired due to being pregnant and breastfeeding - do you think he might be right?

OP posts:
hatesponge · 26/08/2009 20:52

this is fab!

I love unhingedminge....might have to adopt that as my new name unless anyone has already beaten me to it!

oneopinionatedmother · 26/08/2009 21:02

hello loveys, think i ought to pay attention to DH a little bit now.

@Olifin the conversation about my location would go a bit like this -

Enquiring person - 'where in Sussex are you? ' >polite interest<

OOM- 'oh, near Brighton'

Enquiring Person 'Ah Brighton!! How lovely' pause, having briefly lit up with interest,'
'...or do you mean Hove actually' smiles as though is telling funny joke.

OOM 'well more Worthing, really'

Enquiring Mind...face of brief dubiety, then remembers where that is
'Worthing, really.'

OOM >sheepish< "weeeeelll, more Lancing, unfortunately."

enquiring person nods sagely like Stephen Fry,
"ah, unfortunately yes, I see."

but yes we were trying to put together a meet on the local thread - take a look, though there seems to be Brighton gathering on the 5th as well.

ah, film starting, better go and do my wifely duty and at least gaze at the same screen as him.

OP posts:
GrimmaTheNome · 26/08/2009 21:06

.- -. -.. / - .... . -. / ... - . / ... .- .-. - .- .-. ... . / ... - .- .-. - ... / .. - ... - .. -. . / .. -. / - .-. ... . / -.-. --- -.. . .-.-.- .-.-.- .-.-.-

pickyvic · 26/08/2009 21:51

is that morse code?
or is my internet playing up again.

JuJusDad · 26/08/2009 22:06

.... . .-.. .-.. - .. / . .-. .. .-

OOM = comic genius

waitingforfanjo · 26/08/2009 22:43

I like the way I keep calling everyone 'lovely' or 'lovey'. I am obviously a very caring, benevolent fake MNetter.

Do you think I could have a flounce at some point OOM? Never yet done it on a real thread, have probably not been around long enough to be assimilated by MNet ways.

GrimmaTheNome · 26/08/2009 22:49

Sorry, wrong thread, that must have made no sense at all

(theres always one of those, isn't there?)

waitingforfanjo · 26/08/2009 23:02

Just read the 'dummy glued to face' thread and OOms Law has been fulfiled. Someone has recommended a HV, a SALT and a book in the same post.

They will probably now read this and we'll have a flounce as well.

waitingforfanjo · 26/08/2009 23:04

fulfilled, even

Thinkstoomuch · 26/08/2009 23:13

Bravo OOM.

And Morse code interjection has made it even better.

babybarrister · 27/08/2009 07:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Dophus · 27/08/2009 09:02

Barrister - I got lynched yesterday for making a quip about bf a 4yo it was described as a vile comment - an yes even cited WHO guidelines!

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