to be a bit gutted my baby stuff has not been used?

[allaboutme]

I have 2 boys, not having any more.
Gave ALL my baby stuff to my sister when she had a baby boy 7 months ago.
She is not rolling in money and thanked me lots, said she really appreciated it etc.
BUT baby has never worn ANY of the stuff I gave her. In the whole 7 months he has only ever worn a popper vest or a sleepsuit.
None of the stuff I gave her is fancy jeans or anything, all nice and soft and comfy, jerset shorts, T shirts and romper suits etc.
All lovely condition and good quality.
A lot of it outgrown now and not used.
I mentioned once that if there was anything she didnt think they would use, now or in the future etc then I'd like it back to pass on to my friend who could use it, but nothing came back and all gone in her loft for 'the next one'. If she does have another boy, I dont see why that one would wear it all when this one hasnt!
I know it sounds bitchy, but I just feel a bit sad it hasnt been used. I could have sold it all for a fair bit of money, but really would rather my nephew had use of it all in preference.
AIBU to think that they could have at least dressed him in some of it on the odd occasion when they see me?

zipzap - I think it would be very unfair for allaboutme to ask for the stuff back and to say that she wants to pass the things on to her friend or sell them.

She clearly did not LEND the stuff, she GAVE them to her sister (she said 'Anything she wanted I said to do what she wants with').

I would be very annoyed if I was suddenly asked for stuff back that I had been given.

YABU.

1. she may have him in your stuff at home but new stuff she has bought or been given as presents when out

2. Although tshirts and rompers are comfy they are a PITA to put on as they have to go over the head and tshirts always ride up so I stuck to bodysuits over tshirts, front fastening sleepsuits or kimono style rompers for this reason.

Agree - are you sure she didn't sell them herself?

Can you actually get much for second hand baby clothes ? .Hard to give 'em away round here!

you did a lovely thing giving her the items.have a wee glow about that

allaboutme...

When my DD1 was born I received a lot of clothes as presents. Beautiful little dresses and t-shirts and trousers and hats and all sorts.

I thought they were lovely but I am not very good at the whole dressing up thing, DD was in babygros and vests for about 4 months.

I packed them all up and thought, if I have anotehr girls I will really make the effort to use them.

DD2 arrived 9 weeks ago and she is still in babygros and vests. I take the lovely clothes out and look at them and think how lovely they are, then stick her in something really easy.

Maybe your sis is like me? She appreciates the clothes and thinks they are lovely and admires them, but can't quite make the step to actually dressing the baby in them?

I know it seems silly...

What I am getting at is that it is possible to value something without using it. Like ornaments.

ROFL @ abrupt ornament ending to post

I hope you know what I mean though

No good deed goes unpunished...
Since this is family, go over there and get the stuff back. Two carboots full is a lot of baby stuff just lying around unused. Your sister sounds like an ingrate.

Yabu. Very. You gave the clothes because you wanted to give them. Sister said she was grateful. You say that you've only seen him in a couple of sleepsuits or poppers (ones you gave him?). Well its been quite warm, my lo has worn vests a lot this summer because he would have been too hot otherwise. Perhaps she hasn't felt the need for outfits.

Perhaps you shouldn't give things away if you need to go an ego trip about it.

I found that I was a storage place for a freind who just came over with her old clothes, most of which I didn't use, didn't ask for and ended up stroing for as she wanted them back, Ds was also in vests, babygros for the first few months was just so much easier so YABU

What on Earth is the point of 'giving' something away if you're going to ask for it back.

That's a loan, not a gift.

YABU.

I've been given clothes and DS already wore them and I've passed them on to others. Paying it forward and all.

If someone asked for it back I'd be flabbergasted.

Next time, just flog it and be done with it.

BTW, if you think baby clothes are worth a lot of money, guess again!

i was given loads of lovely hand me downs from various friends and relatives when both my kids were born.

I didn't want them but seems very churlish to say 'no thanks' so I took them and said 'oh thanks, that's brilliant'...they all went straight in the loft!

It was nothing personal, they were nice clothes but one of the bits I LOVED about having a new baby was choosing and buying new outfits myself. I also got lots of presents and loved the whole brand new clothes for brand new baby thing.

It's just different strokes for different people.

A friend of mine dresses her kids entirely in other people's (very nice) hand me downs. She says she's rarely bought them anything new and is chuffed to bits that she doesn't have to spend any money.

That wouldn't be my thing at all.

Agree with the other posters that what's done is done, you're gonna have to get over it and next time give stuff to charity where you know it will be appreciated.

i offered someone baby clothes (some unworn) and she got all snippy and had hump that i insinuated she was poor. i really didn't expect that response

i always pass stuff on,and know the recipients pass on to others when they are finished

I have a friend who is so lovely she passed her brand new and gifted baby things to her SIL, whose baby was due 3 months before hers, and then had them back when her boy arrived.

I do think we should appreciate the value of things more - why leave stuff festering in the attic when it could be put to good use? I would love someone to use my stuff when it's been used and would be gutted if they pretended they wanted it while privately rolling their eyes and stocking up on bin liners.

Although of course if this baby continues to refuse to come out, it will need school uniform rather than a sleepsuit with bunny ears .

Thing is teh OP bought these goods for her own DC .They were brand new expensive and lovingly chosen to her tastes.That's how she still sees them
But looking through the sisters eyes they are secondhand jumble.

This might seem a bit odd and probably wouldn't account for none of it being worn but my SIL gave dd loads of beautiful clothes from Next, all perfect condition, beautifully ironed etc and I felt bad about using some of them as dd is such a messy pup. So sometimes I would get to the end of that age range and find some stuff not worn. Although I do use the vast majority of it so probably isn't relevant...

Good point Eyeballs I never put my DC in clothes that were 'lent' for exactly this reason.

I have only rarely bought new clothes for all three of mine.

Gifts and hand-me-downs most welcome and I'm anal about laundry so DD1's stuff is mostly in great condition and now DD2 is in them.

DS is also clothed entirely in hand-me-downs or gifts.

But I'd still be shocked if someone asked for stuff back! First off, I've forgotten who gave me what.

Secondly, I like to sew badges or ribbons or buttons on things or use fabric paint to sort of personalise things, a trend the girls are now carrying on.

Even our furniture is all second hand excpet the beds and the girls have personalised their chairs and chest of drawers. When we get sick of it, just sand it down and paint over it! That's the virtue of secondhand stuff - it makes for a lot of fun and art.