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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Pop-up tents on small, crowded beaches - AIBU not to think these are a bit anti social?

41 replies

tigermoth · 09/08/2009 11:03

Lsst week, I was at small busy beach in Devon. I had my 9 year old with me.

The beach has rocks and was surrounded by cliffs. There was also a stiff sea breeze, so the waves were not that small and every now and again, small children were in tears because a big wave had got them.

My view of the water's edge was severely restricted by all the pop up beach tents lining the shore. It was also difficult to see a full panorama of the beach with its rocks and cliffs.

So from a safety point of view, it would have been difficult for me to keep a close eye on my son.(Luckly he was mainly building sandcastles, so not in the sea).

Also, the scenic view of the beach was spoilt but the lines of tents (not that I'm heavily into scenic views but still....)

The sea round this beach can have strong currents - last year some people got trapped on the rocks. This year there were lifeguards on duty.

If the beach needs lifeguards, surely that means that parents need to be able to watch their children easily when on the beach and in the sea?

So AIBU in thinking all that people who put up their tents along the shoreline were being a bit thoughtless and anti social?

OP posts:

IlanaK · 09/08/2009 21:27

YABU. I have one and have used it not just for my children, but mostly for me. I am allergic to the sun and am sitting here now with a blistered rash on both arms from a shady day out in the park with the children. I don't often go to a beach, but if I did, I would need to sit in the tent and I would not want to be at the back of the beach as I would want to be where I could see my very young children play at the edge of the water and keep an eye on them while staying out of the sun so I don't blister.

Original poster

tigermoth · 09/08/2009 22:14

You all make good points, but seem do so from the perspective of having toddlers or very young children.

If I hovered by the water's edge for any length of time to keep close tabs on my 9 year old, he'd be very cross!

And remember, I did say that the beach I am talking about is a small one, so it should be easy to sit on the beach while keeping an eye on things.

OP posts:

trixymalixy · 09/08/2009 22:45

But the people with the tents probably had young children so it made sense for them to be close to the water.

franklymydear · 09/08/2009 22:49

Love taking a pop-up tent to the beach - it's a changing room and storage and somewhere to shelter when the weather changes

pooka · 09/08/2009 22:59

At our beach the lifeguards have an all terrain van thing and park that by the shoreline, moving it back up towards their hut as the sea comes in (and vice versa as the sea goes out). Is a very deep bay with massive difference between low and high tide though.

I noticed the prevalence of these tents for the first time ever this year - in the old days it was windbreaks that irritated me. Now it's the tents (though I have to say that a small pop up tent takes up less room in terms of manoeuvring down the beach) than a sizeable berlin wall of windbreaks.

I'm not bothered from a safety perspective. Sea here is quite fierce (currents and big waves) so if the children are in the sea, we are watching closely (plus the lifeguards by the shoreline). All the tents end up in the tiny part of the beach where the sand never gets wet, which suits me! All the more virgin sand for us.

pooka · 09/08/2009 23:02

RE: keeping an eye on a 9 year old, my memories of the elders in my family (i.e. my aunt, my grandmother, my uncle, mum or dad) is that one of them would always be sitting or standing at the water's edge like a cricket umpire, covered in towels, going a bit blue round the ankles as the atlantic washed over them, watching us. Probably up to the age of about 12.

But as I said before - the sea where we go on holiday can be unpredictable.

drinkmoretea · 09/08/2009 23:11

YABVVU - No one owns the beach anyone can sit where they like

Would you prefer people to get sunburned rather than be able to sit in a 'tent'?? Thats what would happen to me if I spent more than an hour in the sun even if I kept reapplying factor 50! I do not wish to get skin cancer as have seen the effects of this to a close family member..

These 'tents' provide shelter from the sun, which when you are spending the day at the beach is very much needed..

echt · 10/08/2009 05:49

I second drinkmoretea. If the OP wants a view, get up early in the morning. Sheesh!

spinspinsugar · 10/08/2009 07:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FlamingoBingo · 10/08/2009 07:12

YANBU about being annoyed at them being at the shoreline, but YABU really because, on a crowded beach, surely there wouldn't be space to all put them at the back?

And YABVU not to mind your own child in the sea! This is why safety measures like lifeguards (and stairgates, lines on roads etc) are actually quite dangerous, because naive people think 'ok, I don't have to worry now, someone else is responsible'! Life guards are not there to do your job, they are there to supplement it.

Podrick · 10/08/2009 07:27

I can see why this annoyed you but I don't think the pop up parents were being unreasonable

Original poster

tigermoth · 10/08/2009 21:34

INteresting range of responses. The more I think about it, the more I feel that the 'unthinking' siting of tents by the shoreline is 'thoughtless' and so is a bit selfish.

Tents (or windbreakser) obstruct people's view - it's as simple as that.

To my mind, it's like a tall person hogging a position near the front when a street performance is happening, when there are smaller and shorter people/children behind them. It happens, it's accepted, it's not'evil' but it's still bad mannered and selfish.

FWIW, on the small beach I was on, crowded though it was, there was room nearer the back of the beach for people with tents or windbreakers.

And for those of you who say it's perfectly ok for people to site their tents exsactly where they like, where would you draw the line? Would you still say that it's ok if someone sited a large eight person tent at the shoreline on a small beach?

I do take the point about watching out for children being the responsiblity of parents, not lifeguards - very true. It's just a pity that the throughtless siting of tents can make this more difficult.

OP posts:

dinkystinky · 10/08/2009 21:45

Tigermoth - when we were on holiday in Suffolk last month with DS1 (a toddler) and DS2 (a very small baby) we took a pop up tent - when we got to the beach on a sunny day it was very quiet so we sited our pop up tent for the baby at the back of a small area of beach. During the course of the morning lots more people with pop up tents came along and they basically pitched their tents next to and alongside us - I think its some kind of cluster mentality going on. So that may explain why all the pop up tents were all together. It made it really hard for me to keep an eye on my toddler from the tent where I was tending to the baby. So I guess I can understand why the pop up tents were closer to the sea if people had previously had that experience.

nappyaddict · 11/08/2009 00:30

How close to the shoreline are we talking? I would never put my tent right next to the water's edge because the sand would be wet surely? I always put mine on the nearest bit of dry sand to the sea as possible IYSWIM. That way the wet sand is right next to us so DS can make sandcastles, I can keep an eye on him if he wants to splash at the water's edge and keep an eye on our belongings at the same time.

Fruitysunshine · 11/08/2009 00:41

If I was sitting on the beach watching my kids in the sea and some numpty stuck his tent up right in front of me (oooer!) I would get up and ask him to move it and if he refused I would move it for him.

However if there were tents along the shoreline then I am sure I could squeeze my size 22 derriere in between a couple somewhere so I could sit and watch my kids play in the sea.

Better still - why don't you just buy one yourself? If you can't beat them, join them!

5Foot5 · 12/08/2009 20:45

I have to admit we are very territorial on a beach. Beach shelter goes up first then picnic rug in front of tent and, if PILs with us, deck chairs either side. Beach shelter is good for all sorts of reasons.

Mind you we are rarely, if ever, on a small crowded beach. The one you describe sounds the very opposite of a good day out to me!

And we would never deliberately set our territory out right next to someone else, we would always seek out a spot away from everyone if possible. Well the beach shelter involves long bendy poles so we would probably cause an incident if we tried to erect it in close proximity to others.

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