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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be upset that the postman let himself in to my house?!?!

73 replies

hereidrawtheline · 06/08/2009 12:30

I turn the doorbell off every midday while DS naps as we live in a bungalow and the bell is very loud & the front door right near his bedroom and it closes very very loudly. It is stiff double glazing.

I have had the same postman for ages and he knows to just leave any packages outside the front door and I will get them later. I am the last house on a very quiet cul-de-sac.

Just now I was putting DS to bed and my heart sort of stopped because I heard someone open my front door. To add relevance there is the front door, then a double glazed porch thing and then an inner door which doesnt lock it just opens to the hallway.

I got up to see what it was and across the road I see a new postman. And in my porch, leaning up against the inner door to the hallway are 2 packages.

Now I am pretty upset about it. Firstly, on a practical level, I have the doorbell off in part so it doesnt ring but also because the door is so loud, you have to slam it to get it to close, that it always wakes DS up. DS is SN btw and his rare naps are the only breaks I get so they are sacred. So had DS already been asleep when this happened it would have woken him up.

But secondly I am just really upset the new postman let himself into my house!!! I mean I understand certain country ways that are less formal but I dont know him from adam and I have a long gravel drive on a very quiet road so it isnt like any packages left out are high theft risk. And dont you think its just wrong to walk into someone's house like that?!?! I feel really upset and I know it might be an irrational overreaction but I really did not like it. And I am not an overly precious person I am very laid back but I do draw the line and a total stranger letting himself in! AIBU?

OP posts:

Trikken · 06/08/2009 14:24

definately better than having to get the package later cos the postie wouldnt leave it. think you were being the teensiest bit unreasonable.

RumourOfAHurricane · 06/08/2009 14:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

myredcardigan · 06/08/2009 14:29

@ Lizziemum!
My postie has also taken my keys out the lock and posted them through the letterbox.

TwoHot · 06/08/2009 14:37

Sounds like a considerate postman

NormaSknockers · 06/08/2009 14:48

Sounds like quite a nice postman, I wish mine would leave mine on the porch & not lob them over the gate where they get broken

Blondeshavemorefun · 06/08/2009 14:59

sounds a fab postie - he saved you a trip to the main post office

in future lock the door or leave a note on door saying leave packages by door

our postie often opens back door and leaves post - if i didnt want him to do it, then i would lock the door - dog doesnt even bark at him (tho barks at everyone else) coz he lurves postie

temp postie almost shat himself when he delivered post and huge dog barked at him

FabBakerGirlIsBack · 06/08/2009 15:02

Get yourself a chain for the front door.

He didn't come in your house.

spugs · 06/08/2009 15:08

My post man has done this a couple of times. We don't have a porch so he's basically let himself into my house.
9 times out of 10 the front door is locked as i have 3 children and 2 small dogs but both times he's done it i've forgotten.

What worries me is the fact if he hadn't closed the door properly one of my children/dogs could have got out or he could have got bitten (by a dog not a child ).

On both occasions he hasn't rung the door bell as Ive been sat in the back room.

When I complained i was told that i should lock my front door .

on one occasion the postman also delivered a package supposed for me over the road accidently. He didn't knock on the door either!

spugs · 06/08/2009 15:13

I live in the city centre (hence why the door is normally locked) if packages are too big there supposed to be left with neighbours or returned to the office. Plus it wasnt as if he had rang the door bell! Could have been walking around naked or anything

IneedacleanerIamalazyslattern · 06/08/2009 15:46

I think poor posties can't win and i'm the worlds best for complaining and I can cause dh is a postie buns of steel with all that stair climbing )
My old postie used to leave parcels inside my front door if it was open or goi round the back and see if window was open, he has even popped them in the cat flap before I loved it.
The postie here no idea what he would do as i've always been in but the parcel postie dumps them on the doorstep and that annoys me so poor men cannot win.

pranma · 06/08/2009 16:15

My postman always puts packages in the porch and I am grateful especially if it is raining YABU I think.

cat64 · 06/08/2009 16:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

whitenoise · 06/08/2009 16:38

I have a friend who is a postman and they are not allowed to leave parcels outside (at least, from where he works from- i don't know if thats standard) YABU i am afriad.

funtimewincies · 06/08/2009 16:40

Agree that you may have over-reacted a teensey bit .

My lovely postie puts any parcels in our recycling box in the garden and ALWAYS remembers to bolt the gate afterwards because he knows that I've got a toddler. It saves me so much hassle, not having to get to the sorting office and queue up with a fidgety 2 year old.

And he looks rather lush in a pair of shorts too .

abraid · 06/08/2009 16:41

Are you sure you don't want him to do this? Sounds very sensible to leave them in the porch...

ipiratethief · 06/08/2009 16:46

the other morning my postman rang my doorbell with a parcel that needed a signature. I stuck my head out of upstairs windwow and mumbled 'aaoo ello' cos was having a lie in, and he shouted up 'don't worry i've signed it for you, i'll leave it on the step'

ta postie!!

gingerbunny · 06/08/2009 16:46

i can see where your coming from, it was probably a shock wondering who it was coming into the house.
It would have shocked me too, i would keep your door locked second door locked, so he could get into the porch (if needed) but not into the house.

Original poster

hereidrawtheline · 06/08/2009 16:54

cat64 my DS isnt a baby, he is 3 and has SN so it isnt about us tiptoeing around unfortunately. He sleeps rarely and when he does it is the only time I get a break from a really demanding child.

soooooome of you are a bit overly harsh in your replies of the likes of one or two short sentences talking to me as if I am addle brained. I know its AIBU though. I have said I overreacted so pitchforks down please. It freaked me out because as I said it has never happened to me before and I wasnt sure what the fuck was going on! Then when I realised it was the postie I was a strange mix of confused, relieved and annoyed because me and my postman have such a good bargain. At any rate I did overreact a bit but either way I am totally over it now and back to my original panic of how to get all my shit done in the tiny amount of time I have left before I go to my evening job!

OP posts:

Blondeshavemorefun · 06/08/2009 16:55

"My lovely postie puts any parcels in our recycling box in the garden"

hopefully not on recycling day

Original poster

hereidrawtheline · 06/08/2009 16:55

I fell asleep during DS's nap!

OP posts:

bubblagirl · 06/08/2009 17:14

i can understand it startled you to see or hear someone come in but the relief feeling was good oh its just the postie his doing his job left it in porch but i also feel your pain when ds is asleep god forbid if anyone wake him as you know has sn as well and rarely sleeps so maybe it was the fear of god someone is coming in and please dont wake my child that has made you feel wound up

me and my posties have a great understanding and have no worries if one pops in to put parcel in id rather that than left outside

ynbu in the fact that it startled you it could have been anybody but wasn't luckily or not wanting ds to be disturbed maybe a note on door put parcel in first door please may prevent it happening someone may have had a go at postie at another house and his just trying to do his job properly

must be quite difficult for them at times hope work goes ok later and ds had good sleep and is behaving for you

Original poster

hereidrawtheline · 06/08/2009 17:17

no I know I am prone to temp insanity at times. I work all hours god sends either at home or at work and get such a shitty amount of sleep so I did overreact. Mea Culpa!

OP posts:

bubblagirl · 06/08/2009 17:30

you were spooked thats perfectly normal trya nd rest up when you ds is sleeping lock front door or put note on other door then you wont be listening out nervy all the time xx

nickelbabe · 06/08/2009 17:30

i would have assumed it wa a porch too, if I were the postie.
i can understand why you were worried though.

the postman at my old house (in the country) lused to leave parcels under the stairs and pop a note on the other letters to let us know it was there.
we could always tell if we got a parcel on his day off because it would be on the top step drowning in the rain....
some use logic, others don't!

(ps: i wouldn't be too upset if the postman at my new house let himself in: it's his house and he has keys.... )

abraid · 06/08/2009 17:48

Naughty you, running away with the postman, nickelbabe... ;)

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