To think there is no such thing as a "good" baby

[Reallytired]

Babies are babies, they have no concept of good or evil. It really annoys me when people ask about my 12 week old baby "Is she good?" (What they are really asking is whether she sleeps through the night)

I am lucky in that my daughter is very easy to look after. My son was much more of a challenge at 12 weeks old.

No baby is bad and I would be furious at the suggestion that my son was bad just because he woke 3 times a night.

Yes, it is annoying but it really is just harmless chit chat.

You have a good point there.
I'll rephrase my question the next time I'm about to ask someone if their baby is good.

I think it is a figure of speech. Not something to get cross about. All you have to do is smile beatifically and say 'ah yes, he's an angel'.

Or 'No, he has already racked up 4 ASBOs'

It is annoying but it's just one of these things that people say to make conversation. You could answer:

'Is he good? Well, he's got an ASBO.'

That should shut them up!

Hey, ASBO chat X post!

The terminology doesn't really bother me, its obvious what they're asking and I don't think anyone would suggest a baby is "evil" for waking you up?! (although at 3am it sometimes feels a bit that way! )

LOL the title kind of reads as though you were saying that all babies were bad. I was thinking "at last, a thread I can sign up to without reservations".

YANBU .

my ds was good my dd was evil

if you don't know the dif between literal and euphamisms its time to give up doll

Say wha socd?
Are you on the wrong thread again?

I wondered about that diamond. It struck me as very pertinent advice for anyone and any situation!

Same here custy although I'd say ds was bad, dd evil.

But nobody ever bothered asking me if my babies were 'good'. Twas plain for all to see, twas a living nightmare.

hence I snapped them over the beanstalk and covered them in salad leaves. When I recently exposed them (now aged 14 and 7) I found them really quite civilised.

I love shineons advice.

YABU its just what people say for chit chat, nobody thinks a baby is evil.
Having said that i did want to chin a woman once who told me that when i described my non sleeping non ds as evil. If i want to call my own ds evil then i will.

I think it's just short-hand for saying "Are you having a good/bad time of things with your new baby?" -- takes a lot less time to say "Is she/he good?"

However, having had a non-sleeping baby for months on end it did annoy me because I couldn't truthfully answer yes but didn't want to say he was bad!

YABU. You know what they mean, and you know they are not asking you if she's horrible. Mind you, 12 week old baby, so you may be really really tired. You could be forgiven for being unreasonable.

I remember being asked be all and sundry if each baby slept through the night (why are people obsessed with that?), and answering bewilderedly; of course not he's a baby! They aren't designed to sleep through the night!

I once made a comment to a neighbour that DS2 hadn't slept well and she replied, 'oh dear, you didn't get a good one then!'. My maternal protective instinct went into overdrive on his behalf but I know she didn't mean it. I am the queen of meaning well and saying stuff badly.

With my first, ds, who was a dream I never knew what people were on about when they asked that. The other thing was "oh isn't he pleasant" which I thought was a bit bland but now I know means smiley and calm.
With my dd who wasn't so easy I realised what they meant and of course she wasn't bad, but she was a bit of a challenge!

My reply is "yes, I hardly have to smack him at all." Or "yes, he spends much less time in the naughty cupboard than his brother."

Having said that, DS2 is an Actual Perfect Baby.

Please 'scuse deviation from main thread, but... You are one crazy diamond. Is this linked to pavlovas?