Am I overreacting or is this a big deal?

[melonian]

My DS 15 months has been going to a childminder for 3 months, and I am generally really pleased with her, and he seems really happy there. There are a few minor issues like the telly seems to be on most of the time, but I really like and trust the childminder.

However, my DH picked DS up earlier than usual yesterday just as she was returning home, and she had left the children with her husband, who works from home. My DS was having a nap at the time anyway, and I don't know how long she was gone, but I just feel it was wrong - husband hasn't been CRB checked or anything.

The other thing was he had been in the same nappy all day from 8 when I left him until 3 when DH picked him up (we use cloth and there were no dirty ones in his bag). I am v.unimpressed that she didn't change him before his nap.

Would this be a dealbreaker for you? DC2 is due in Oct and I had planned to keep sending him 2 mornings when I am on mat leave but am now thinking of looking for a nursery for both DC and leaving the childminder when I go on mat leave.

Thanks for your opinions

Are sure her DH has not had a CRB check because everyone in the house of a childminder has to be checked. That means Parteners and adult children.

As corriefan says my CM's DH is CRB checked and registered as an assistant so he can cover for instances such as CM's illness/medical appointments etc..This was made clear before DS started with her and she always lets me know if he will be minding DS.
So for your CM to leave your DS with her DH without telling you is totally out of order but goes against regulations. (Agree that any adult in house has to be CRB checked but its not just him being around but actually being solely responsible for DS)
Telly not so bad IMO esp as older kids prob are watching it after school but the nappy thing is not good. Unless she has washed and dried it as others have said.
Needs tackling straight away though, maybe try to discuss with her in a formal way, at a time not during her working day so not distracted by your DS or other kids? I would see how she reacts to conversation, if she's a bit arsey I would look at other c/care, you are paying her after all!
my Also CM does a daily diary of food, naps, nappy changes and activites for each day, not sure if thats a requirement by regs or just good practise?
Good luck with it all x

The nappy would be the big issue here for me - was it the same one you had sent him in - had she perhaps changed the nappy but reused the wrap and washed the nappy. Have there been other times when he has not brought wet/dirty nappies home?

I agree that you should try to have a chat and see if you can work things out. Especially as you are generally happy with her.

I am coming to the end of my ML with DD2 and throughout DD1 (2.10yo) has continued to go to CM for 2 sessions each week (she is usually there for 4-5 full days). She has always loved going and gets to mix with more children, go to playgroups and do all sorts of things I just don't get round to. It has also been great to have some 1-1 time with DD2. You might find this very useful when DC2 comes along.

Good luck.

My CM (who works with an assistant) fills in a daily diary giving an outline of the day's activities. They manage to do this even with 5 or 6 mindees coming and going each day.

You might want to ask if this CM could do this for you - or simply ask at pick up what they have been up to today.

DD1's diary often includes half an hour of Cbeebies after lunch or around pick up time. this is fine with me.