Gah. Ebay ettiquette

[Queenoftheharpies]

So, I've bought a thing on ebay and contacted the seller to say I might be able to pick it up the following day and asked for her address / contact number etc. I deliberately didn't say any times because it wasn't definite I'd be able to pick it up and wouldn't know until the day itself.

Turns out I couldn't, and was out all day that day. When I got back to my e-mail there was a mail from her saying she'd waited in all day and cancelled stuff.

I feel terrible now!

The way I do things with ebay / freecycle is to go about my business until I have a definite message saying exactly what time and day the person is coming to collect

Am I being unreasonable in thinking that "might" is very different from "will"?

And I spelled etiquette wrong. Clearly I am being unreasonable, and a bad person all round.

But looking at it the other way, wouldn't you be really annoyed if you'd told someone you might collect something and they'd said that was fine but then gone out when you got there?

I'd contact them first with an exact time I was planning on coming round, and probably also phone in advance when I was setting off, so they'd know exactly when I was coming.

I think it depends on how you worded it tbh.

As well as saying that you might be able to pick it up the following day did you also add very clearly that this was not a definite arrangement and you would definitely telephone/e-mail in advance if you were hoping to pick it up on that day?

You are clear about the way that you do things with ebay/freecycle but perhaps best not to assume that everyone else also does things the same way.

I think it depends on how you worded it tbh.

As well as saying that you might be able to pick it up the following day did you also add very clearly that this was not a definite arrangement and you would definitely telephone/e-mail in advance if you were hoping to pick it up on that day?

You are clear about the way that you do things with ebay/freecycle but perhaps best not to assume that everyone else also does things the same way.

It was literally a one-liner on the paypal transaction saying 'I might be able to pick up tomorrow - let me know your contact details'.

I didn't make any arrangements beyond that.

I wouldn't have made any plans on that basis if the situation was reversed.

I know the whole thing is a stupid bit of miscommunication on my part and as a result I feel terrible.

I would send her an e-mail (although I expect you have done so already) apologising for the misunderstanding and explaining you wrongly assumed she would understand what you meant.

To be fair, in her position I would have gone out regardless if you hadn't managed to ring me, so don't worry.