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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To object to my MIL rehoming a Rottweiler?

63 replies

Momdeguerre · 04/07/2009 23:47

So, DS is 11 months. DH and I work full time, weird shifts as both bobbies but we manage most of our chidcare between us. Rarely we have to ask for help from our very supportive family.

We looked at nursery care but MIL in particular was vociferous that she did not want 'strangers' looking after her grandchild. So, as a result, occasionally she does childcare for us.

This week they decided to re-home a 3 year old Rottweiler from a rescue centre. Dog has been badly abised in the past and was identified as being unsuitable for being re-homed with children. MIL and FIL are fit but slight 67 and 69 yr olds. They had a dog a few years ago which was lovely but indulged and badly controlled to the point that it attacked a cyclist one day as they were unable to restrain it.

I don't object to them re-homing a dog, totally their decision but I am no longer happy for DS to be cared for by them at their house while they have the dog. They swear it will always be kept in the kitchen but, from previous experience with their last dog, they show neither the ability or intention of managing to do this.

MIL and SIL both called me today to say I ABU. I disagree.

What do you think? Let me have it. . .

OP posts:

pickyvic · 05/07/2009 17:39

id look at a nursery place - as a bobbie you can get a great deal on childcare vouchers. it eeks the cost out a good deal - think you can claim a fair bit for each month - a colleague of mine does it - he is a regular PC.

YANBU by the way.

Longtalljosie · 05/07/2009 17:46

They can't be that nice if their reaction to your understandable concerns about their rottweiler is to suggest you're doing it to restrict access... on your behalf!

Kimi · 05/07/2009 17:57

I think you need to insist that if they look after your child they do it in your home not theirs.
yanbu

PeachyTheRiverParrettHarlot · 05/07/2009 18:07

From teh thread title I thought YABU- then as I read it became obvious that you are nbot.

My Mum had (died 2 weeks ago ) a rescue dog that was not a Rottie but still big and had been abused, she never ever let it near my boys unattended- it wasn't a badly thought of breed but doesn't need to be, IMO no dog and small child should be left unattended in that way. I actually like Rotties as well, but my ds1 was even bitten by a nasty bugger Westie owned by MIL so it's a no way thing full stop.

if you don't have theat level of trust with MIL then you simply can't leave them there, your house or Nursery. If your MIL sees ita s an imposition ad states that, state you agree it might well be and thans, you've appreciated all her help, many wouldn't get it wtc but now is time for a change.

And then bear no grudges, just move on

catwalker · 05/07/2009 18:15

No way are you being unreasonable. My inlaws used to have a springer spaniel that they doted on. When my eldest was a toddler i used to get the, "oh, he wouldn't hurt a fly.." routine. Of course DS toddled over to the dog one day, took him by surprise and the dog snapped at him. The dog missed, but the intention was clear, even to my head-in-the-sands MIL. Every time we visited after that (they live 200 miles away) she put the dog in kennels. I never quibbled with this.

I absolutely adore dogs. I have a two year old labrador - the softest dogs on the plant. I am vary wary when she is around my sister's 2 year old grandson. She (the dog) isn't used to toddlers (my kids are in/near their teens now) and they make her very nervous. A nervous dog is more likely to react if they feel under threat.

The RSPCA have a rule that they won't house rescue dogs with people who have children under 12. This is for a very good reason. Rescue dogs often have sad pasts which can make them unpredictable. Your inlaws are being complete and absolute idiots.

catwalker · 05/07/2009 18:15

oops! I meant to say the softest dogs on the planet, not the plant!!

Ripeberry · 05/07/2009 18:29

Do not use your Mother in law for babysitting any more! Sorry, but i will never trust one of those Devil dogs, even if it was locked in another room.
My friend down the road, keeps two rotties in her yard and they are in a kennel run.
One day they just BURST through the netting and killed all their chickens (15 of them).
They still keep the dogs and say they are big softies!
Too much risk!

Ripeberry · 05/07/2009 18:32

Rotties are strange as they don't growl like normal dogs, they just attack. Not making eye contact is a bad sign!
O.K little dogs may bite more, but they have less chance of killing you!

bethoo · 05/07/2009 18:37

tbh i am surprised they have been allowed to take on this dog especially if they appear to have had no control over their other dog. rottweilers are suited for experienced firm dog handlers/owners. i like rotties and have never had one but i am aware of how they can be unmanageable without a firm hand. do not trust your MIL with your lo whilst she has this dog as some people have the attitude of ''oh they will be ok left alone for a second!'' just have to see in the media the results of that misjudgement! though of course this can happen with most breeds but sadly not many cause the severity of damage as the more powerful dogs.

junglist1 · 05/07/2009 18:41

Oh and can I wish nothing but bad luck to the dog beater for the rest of their scummy lives. I should've added that in my first post, and I know everyone agrees with that dog lovers or not

Qally · 05/07/2009 19:48

Ripeberry, properly trained, disciplined and cared for Rotties are lovely; my friend has one who is brilliantly trained, managed and supervised, and she is a lovely dog. But I wouldn't trust ANY dog unsupervised with a baby or small child, and a Rottweiler is incredibly strong and powerful, and bred to guard and defend, so far more dangerous than your average family mutt around kids.

It isn't the breed that is the problem, it's owners who aren't capable of understanding the dog, or their own limitations.

PeachyTheRiverParrettHarlot · 05/07/2009 19:59

Agree Qally.

I don't think rotties are inherently 'worse' than any other breed, but due to sheer sizre could inflict damage far mroe easily

ray81 · 05/07/2009 20:45

YANBU

I have a 7yr old DD and a springer and a border collie, neither dog is left alone with my DD at anytime, i love my dogs and they are big softies but i still wouldnt trust them i would never take that risk.

My mum has 3 Dobermans and i would have to admitt before they got the dogs i thought they were awful and scary, however again like my dogs they are big softies and scared of their own shadows but my mum would never leave my DD or my nieces and nephews alone with them. When the childrena are around the dogs go in the garden or the shed.
I dont think it matters what breed of dog it is they can all turn in a second and no child should ever be left alone with a dog at any point.

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