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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To want my to pay attention to me at all times...?

34 replies

ErikaMaye · 16/06/2009 14:21

Am really hoping its the pregnancy - have NEVER been a clingy person. Its got to the point where I even go in to kiss him when he's in the bath. Our baby is due in November, and I'm frightened that the Green-Eyed Monster that's taken over my body might hang around until and after then.

But I need to be loved right now - I can justify every stalker-like movement. Awh man... Think I've actually gone bonkers this time people!!

OP posts:
Curiousmama · 19/06/2009 10:05

Found this site don't know if it's any use to you?

Curiousmama · 19/06/2009 10:06

This one's recommended on there too.

ErikaMaye · 19/06/2009 12:33

Thanks for the thought - hugs are much appriciated at the moment.

Its all a bit up in the air what support I'm going to be recieving. I've been seeing the therapist I'm with now since my discharge from my physc. unit last September, and the new team haven't got their arses in gear yet really. They've made inital contact but I haven't met them - I don't even know how long I'm going to be seeing them for. In the meantime I'm down to just one therapy session a week

Social services are on about considering placing me in a mother / baby physc. hospital. She said its not too bad, that its more about making sure you form the bond with the baby whilst you get the support than judging or anything. I said I'd do it if it was decided that was whats best. I'd just like to know whats happening, and I don't.

I'll be living with my parents, so I won't be doing things entirely by myself. My mum is home by 3 most days as she runs a play school. My concern is during the days when I'm absolutely shattered and no one else is here... The first few weeks will be the worst, and I won't be by myself for them, at least.

I've had several suicide attempts. My most recent was the end of January. I haven't hurt myself in any way since I found out I was pregnant, and its been very difficult. The thoughts and feelings are very deep rooted, I've been cutting and burning since I was nine, and have had periods of anorexia / bulimia on and off for years. Being pregnant with that has been really hard - the morning sickness brought back a lot of memories and the weight gain has been so difficult to handle.

Admittedly, they've only been to see me once so far. I have a full pre-birth assessment meeting next week, which I'm dreading. Logically, I don't see how they can say NOW if I'm going to be a good mother, because I'm not a mother yet. I've done everything I can to ensure the healthy growth of my baby, and thats the best I can do for now. I can't say how I'm going to deal with it if I'm having a bad day because I've never been in that situation before.

I'm in the South-East, just outside of Brighton. I've found so much support here, and I can't thank you enough for taking the time to reply to me. It stops me feeling quite so lonely. I don't mind putting my address up here - I have one specifically for using online. Its [email protected]

And thankyou for finding those sites for me. I've added them to my favorites list. I haven't read the whole thing through entirely yet, but they look really helpful.

Thankyou so much. It really means so much to me that you're caring. Thankyou. x

OP posts:
Curiousmama · 19/06/2009 12:48

Erika a lot of people have tried to end their life and got through it and are still here. Some of my friends have done so and survived and are also mothers. No-one has tried to take their children off them, only supported them.

I can imagine how awful it is for you dealing with this weight gain but hopefully it'll be the beginning of you loving your body. I know eating disorders go much deeper, it isn't vanity but a control issue. You're a strong person to have coped with all this.

I'll add you to msn and also maybe facebook if you're on there?

Am off out now to go to dr's with a friend. chat soon take care x

ErikaMaye · 19/06/2009 14:10

Thankyou for being so kind about it all... I know it must sound a bit nuts to listen to.

I'm trying really hard, and am avoiding being weighed fevertly. I try and remind myself that its good weight, because its not fat, its in fact a baby, but sometimes that just doesn't work. Wow I wish my head worked correctly!!

Yes am on facebook, will give you my name to search for when we chat / email on msn if thats okay.

Thank you again... Keep smiling. x

OP posts:
notevenamousie · 19/06/2009 15:26

Sounds like a bit of a bad time to be withdrawing from medication - that must be tough.
Do you think you'd be able to sit down with your DP and discuss what you need from him, and he from you, at this time?
Keep talking - mumsnet has people from all sorts of backgrounds, many of us have experienced mental health or other illnesses, it certainly helps keep me sane.

Curiousmama · 19/06/2009 19:50

I agree with notevenamousie, mumsnet is full of emphatic people from all backgrounds. I've always found it a really supportive site. I just ignore those who aren't

Look forward to chatting to you on msn

ErikaMaye · 20/06/2009 10:58

Thanks I'm back at DPs this weekend and we haven't really talked about it. I told him what was said by the doctors yesterday and I think he understands why I've been so outragously crazy...

OP posts:
Kimi · 20/06/2009 11:10

I think you are following the sure fire way to run off a man, It is going to be hard, why are you not going to live with him especially once baby arrives? Very odd.
I think a trip to the Dr will be a good thing.

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