I know I'm being QUITE unreasonable, but...

[angelene]

AIBU to want to buy clothes for my DD?

My MIL has filled DD's wardrobe with clothes to the point that there's no need for me to buy her anything. They're not too bad, mostly not really what I'd buy for her, but they'll do.

I know this sounds incredibly ungrateful, and I am sure I'll get massively flamed, but I only have one child and it would just be nice for me to buy something for her, just to go shopping and think what would suit her and what fantastic, funky clothes are out there that she would love and would look brilliant on her. But she has so much that it seems that she doesn't need anything else, and that makes me sad.

I can understand on ds1 my mil bought cheap bargains that I wouldn't use as I personally don't like them, like newborn jeans I used to keep them because I felt guilty I have pointed out that I am not too fussed on jeans but she still buys them. On this pg I will be selling anything I really don't like and using the money to get something I do like. My son has really bad skin and if I put cheap nappies on him would get a bad bum I pointed this out but still mil would buy cheap nappies and I would feel guilty for not putting them on him. But I have politely said and if she wants to waste money so be it.

yikes angelene - are you actually my sister in law my MIL is the same - always buying stuff just because its cheap...and she has 2 DSs as well. btw, YANBU. agree with previous posters, just buy more stuff yourself anyway, I would.

Have you read my toaster thread?!
YANBU - I can see exactly what you mean - I hate getting gifts of things that aren't your choice but then you'd feel guilty for not using them. Amazed the flaming hasn't started though

ReneRusso - if you are my sister-in-law that would be great cos she's ace!

Theres a lot of threads with this theme especially at Christmas!

Stuff is sometimes given for the satisfaction of the giver, without much thought to the recipents part in it,
other than its socially accepted that you have to be greatful for anything given

even though the motivations of the giver may not actually be very generous (eg - I want my grandaughter dressed in this, it should be my choice, I want to seem generous, you arent adult enough to make choices, I want to buy the firsts - eg bike, shoes, look how much I care, look how profligate and irresponsible you are with money, etc etc)

Its lovely to recive things and even nicer to give a well chosen and considered gift
Just give some of the clothes away - friends, charity and buy what you like

YANBU - My MIL is just the same! All gifts are greatfully received in the spirit in which they are given, but I do sometimes find myself wistfully eyeing things up in the shops.

MIL buys either supermarket clothes, or sale items, but loads thereof, to the point where she could have bought half a dozen full price things in the GAP and spent less money. I have tried pointing out things that are more to my taste, but the pink t-shirts keep a-coming.

I should add that I am fairly certain that MIL does this as she and FIL were poor as church mice when their own children were young, and couldn't afford to buy them new clothes. So I do understand why she loves to buy little things when she sees them now. She just needs to calm down a bit .

Send your dd to nursery/messy play in your MIL's clothes. They will get thrashed there.

Then you can go out and buy your dd pristine clothes in your taste, in all good conscience.

I feel your pain and i don't think YABU. When DS was born, people bought loads for him, and it was very much appreciated, but my neice had had a little boy a few months before, and of course, i got all his handmedowns. They too were appreciated, but it would have been nice for me to go and choose some clothes for him.

i don't think you're being unreasonable. why not give some of it away to friends or people on mumsnet??

then go and spend some money on your daughter