to be fed up with rush hour commuters who think they own public transport

[LadyAga]

I do my best to avoid being caught in the rush hour commute on the buses/tube/trains etc, but from time to time it does happen when I have my 10mth DS and occassionaly 6yr DD.

At none rush hour times I find people are either helpful or politely uninterested. In rush hour we get tutted and huffed, glared at and subjected to rude, passive-aggressive comments. The whole tone is generally aggressive and unpleasant.

It's public transport, we have as much right to be there are any otherpaying traveller!

For the record, I used to work in the City (not a banker ) and I am well aware of the stresses and strains of work and the commute and I don't think excuses being so rude to people/children who happen to be taking up space that you want.... grrr

What about those of us who have to commute with our children? DD (3.6) and I have to get an overground train and the tube every day, as she goes to nursery near my work. Fortunately, I don't have a buggy anymore and when I did I would fold it up, but would still get tutted at constantly, and still often do if DD is being particularly loud/whingey but what choice do I have? I have to work to pay the bills and I can't afford to put DD in a nursery near home as she would have to be there 2-3 hours a day longer than she is at the moment.

I used to take my DS2 on the tube in the rush hour when he was 8 weeks old. He had a big pram/combination system which was impossible to fold. Even if I couldve folded it what would have I done with a tiny baby.

Before you come up with all sorts of reasons why I should have bought such a stupid pram or taken a tiny baby on the tube at rush hour:

I first met DS2 when he was a day off 8 weeks. I got a call from my SIL a week before asking me if I would look after nieces (not her DD) baby as he was being removed by social services.

Scroll on a week and I was transporting this little scrap across London for 'contact' visits with his birth mother. She refused to come to see him 'why should I?', social services wouldnt pay for a taxi (well not for me, birth mother got them all over the shop) and in order for me to get DS over to his birth mum at a time convienient for her I had to take him on the tube at precisely the time the rest of London was going to work.

It was bloody horrible bit there was feck all I could do about it. I am sure most of the carriage thought I was going shopping or should've bought a more sensible bugggy.

To be fair, I did get a lot of help at the station. Just as well because that farking pram weighed a ton and DS was feeding every hour during the night so I was like a wrung out dishrag.

It just astounds me how angry commuters are all the time. I was a commuter and when I first started working in London I was briefly sucked in, but then I realised this is what it's about and there's no point being angry twice and day, every day for something that I can't control (unless I craftily arranged client meetings so I could sneak off early).

You pay a ridiculous price to be crammed in against strange, sweaty and usually smelly bodies (btw, I've never seen a smelly person tutted at the way I have when I have DC's and to me they are truly inconsiderate! ) You have to accept that you will not get a seat, there will be lots of people, trains/tubes will be delayed and cancelled, you can't always get on the frst, second or third tube/bus that comes along due to over-crowding.

What staggers me is that people do this everyday and everyday they are still angry and indignant that this happens.

Personally, when commuting to work without I children I have never minded the luggage, pushchairs etc as it's public transport designed for everyone and not just commuters.

Yes, commuters have less flexibility but unless you are just going for a wander around the shops or lunch with your friend there are many reasons why non-commuters have to travel in peak times.

Surely the anger and frustration should be at the transport operators and not at the people who are just as pissed off that they are on the train with you as you are at them.

Oh, I tut smelly people. I also tell people to turn their headphones down or switch off the music that's coming from their phone. I also, tediously, explain to tourists that the train/Tube is not a social space and that commuters aren't being rude when they ignore people, it's just that pretending people aren't there is the only way to stay sane.

I think you have to be a saint not to get angry on a rush hour train.

Its bloody vile.

I was on a hot tube the other month when there was a very smelly tramp in the carriage, slumped across a number of seats. People were gagging and keeping their distance. Suddenly the train lurched and a shower of small jobbies shot out of the bottom of his trousers. I have never seen commuters dance like that before.

I get very grumpy with people taking hordes of children into and out of London in the rush hour, especially when they put three year olds on seats. Put the littlies on your lap and let the older ones stand! Or better still, leave London earlier or go and have something to eat and leave a bit later.

Blimey Mrs S!

I don't have to use the tube much but one day I was in a carriage and there was a busker playing IN the carriage. And it was really loud electric violin complete with distortion on the amp.

He was a good player but I dont really see why he felt he had the right to impose that racket on all of us.

haven't read the other posts, but tbh, commuters do own the public transport. If it wasn't for them, it wouldn't exist. They fund it by paying far higher ticket prices day in, day out. Those of us lucky enough not to commute often can choose to travel at a quieter, cheaper (subsidised by the commuters), time.

mumincity I was also a commuter with baby in buggy for many years. DS1 went to nursery half way to work and Ds2 went to nursery neards to work.

DS1 we took on bus and ds2 on tube (as our line wasn't built when ds1 was a baby).

Then both went to nursery nearer to home from 2-5yrs.

I felt perfectly entitled to do this but it was not particularly pleasant.

However luckily now I can avoid the tube for my journey to work and my dcs schools are five mins walk away.

Many children have to do rush hour tube/rail journeys to get to school such is the education system in London.

Public transport should be just that public. Don't agree that one group should feel more entitled than others.

I commute on the tube every day in rush hour, and I always have time and sympathy for people with kids and babies. I'm grumpy and I hate rush hour, but always find space in my black commuter's heart to feel for a parent and child on the tube. And a seat - I get so worried seeing littlies holding on when the tube is crowded and jerky.
Mind you, was a little bit disconcerted when I offered and helped a girl with her very heavy buggy up two flights of steps at Ealing Broadway the other day and got neither a please or thank you...charming

oh mum23monkeys; is that really what you think or are you just being provocative?

You can't honestly believe that the commuters own the public transport, that's just silly. They pay more because the transport operator's know that they can penalise commuters. Do you think they run their service at non-peak times out of the goodness of their hearts as there is no profit to be made at those times?

I don't mind people with children and/ or buggies on trains but as others have said someone who is taking up space because they don't want to be three feet away from their suitcase always gets a stern look from me.

I usually feel sorry for parents with little ones on a crowded train - my idea of hell!

LadyAga - yup, being a bit provocative.

But also with a point - a lot of public transport services are not economic to run during the quieter times. Service providers are obliged to do so because they are a public service, but commuters keep the prices lower for us all. Without them either off-peak prices would have to rise enormously or more money would have to be found from the public purse. I'm not saying either of these options are right or wrong, but it is the case.

But if you have paid for your ticket then of course you are as entitled to a space on the train whether you are suited and booted, or in jeans with baby sick down your shoulder. Buggies and other paraphanaelia is bound to irritate people though who are squished and grumpy anyway.

Agree with everyone who says that commuting is stressful and sometimes you can't help it.

The problem with parents and children on rush hour is that while most of the time they try to be considerate, a lot seem to think that because they have a baby the rest of the train should immediately clear the way, give them special treatment and be okay with the fact that they're taking up a lot of space. A few months ago at a station where there wasn't space for everyone to get on the train I saw a woman with a buggy push all the people in front of her out the way (using the buggy) obviously, and then she was tutting away like no one's business once she got on the train to make it clear she was horrified that she hadn't immediately got preferential treatment.

People with suitcases are the same - my personal hate is people who wheel their suitcases far behind them but don't pay any attention to where they are so the suitcase constantly trips people who aren't watching out for stray cases.

Well, we decided to bite the bullet and pay for a cab yesterday rather than face the tube with DS and DD on their first time in London - we had done one short tube journey earlier in the day and DD(2) was not keen - so by 6pm when she was tired, tubes were packed, and we had buggy & bags (even though buggy would have been folded) it was just not going to happen.

Having said that I agree with an earlier post - when I am travelling for work in peak times, smiling at babies / helping with pushchairs is one of the few things which makes me feel human!