Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that mums should get some sort of concession for student loan repayments?

323 replies

bubbleymummy · 29/05/2009 10:19

I just got my student loan statement and yet another big whack of interest has gone on. I haven't been able to make any payments since I went on maternity leave 3 years ago because I only worked PT after ds. Now I have ds2 and who knows when I'll be back to ft work. dh on the other hand has paid back over half of his. It just seems a bit discrimatory to me...most women will have to take a salary drop at some stage to have a family and won't hit the threshold for repayments while the interest just piles on...shouldn't we get a bit of a break?

OP posts:
sarah293 · 31/05/2009 20:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

lockets · 31/05/2009 20:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

expatinscotland · 31/05/2009 20:29

Okay, then, bubbly, go and get us some statistics about groups 1 and 2. Let's see just how many women a) have student loans b) then chose to have two children close together before paying them off and become SAHMs or work PT and still earn below the threshhold.

violethill · 31/05/2009 20:31

SM is saying that it's also a quite reasonable point of view that a student loan is a personal issue in the way that a joint mortgage isn't. So some households might view it differently that's all.

FWIW, we tend to divvy up all money coming into the house - there has never been a sense of 'his' or 'mine' and at various times I have earned more, and at other times, DH has earned more.

However, I could in theory see that if, for example, DH made a decision to take out a loan to pursue further study, he might see it as his responsibility to pay back. Not necessarily but possibly.

Anyway that's a personal detail for each family to consider. The argument of the OP remains ridiculous - wanting preferential treatment in paying back a loan just because she is choosing not to work at the moment.

howtotellmum · 31/05/2009 20:32

BG- I think you are sneakily avoiding one or two points- you have said that this situation is not "just/solely about you and your circumstances"- when suggestions were made that your DH contributed to paying off the loan.

Does this mean that you could, as a couple, afford to make payments, but you choose not to- and then blame the system for being unfair to women?

I think you need to look at the loan in the samw way as any loan- if for example, I had a car loan before I got married, it would when I was married a "joint debt"- certainly in law! Therefore, our joint income would pay it off.

As you are unable or unwilling to work full time and your H played some part in creating your children, then he should also contribute to the cost of the loan and pay it off as soon as possible.

You seem to be constantly ignoring the fact that you chosen to have 2 children very close together and presumably did have a choice int THAT- yet are unwilling to accept the effect that has on your income.

My parents waited 6 years before I was born, due to lack of money and another 9 years before my brother arrived- again, due to saving up for an extension for another bedroom!

You can't have it all.
I don't know how old you are- you won't say- but if you had waited til your 30s to have children, you might not be complaining so much now.

scottishmummy · 31/05/2009 20:33

what don't i get lockets?your point you keep emphasising

as i see it student debt was individually accrued for vocational and employment prospects.it remains the responsibility of that person to pay off the choices they made in their teens/20's. and use their degree hopefully to its maximum vocational and earning capacity

other shared choices eg mortgage are shared benefit,signed up to jointly.that is a true shared responsibility.both parties acquieseed to it

violethill · 31/05/2009 20:34

'Violethill - EMA is calculated on earnings. Can you not reduce your hours so that your dcs qualify? '

Yes, I could.

But what a f!ing ridiculous system we have that I should even have to consider that.

What a message to give to my children. "Mum will work less hours so the 'Government' (ie other hard working tax payers) can give them some more money."

No wonder this country is in a mess.

Whatever happened to the idea of a work ethic?

Quattrocento · 31/05/2009 20:35

I'd be interested to know if the OP has taken any points made on this thread on board.

Or not

SoupDragon · 31/05/2009 20:35

Scottishmummy, the bit you are missing is that, as a SAHM, you are contributing to the family income by not having to fork out on childcare. Thus, the money bought in my the working partner is joint income and therefore is used to pay each person's individual debt.

wombleprincess · 31/05/2009 20:35

err... you took out a loan. you have to pay it off. I am presuming you chose to become pregnant...

has the state of further education in the UK got so bad that the average graduate doesnt even understand the basics of finance and contraception?

wombleprincess · 31/05/2009 20:35

err... you took out a loan. you have to pay it off. I am presuming you chose to become pregnant...

has the state of further education in the UK got so bad that the average graduate doesnt even understand the basics of finance and contraception?

lockets · 31/05/2009 20:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

howtotellmum · 31/05/2009 20:37

SM- are you saying that an individual's debts remain so, after they get married? Your argument lacks logic- a degree acquired before marriage can benefit both parties due to potentially higher income and better job prospects. I think when wemarry we sign up to the notion- "to love and cherish, for better and for worse, including the repayment of your /our student loans!"

sarah293 · 31/05/2009 20:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

pavlovthecat · 31/05/2009 20:38

bubbly My pleasure. It makes me so effing mad, the hypocracy of it all. Its ok for rich government beaurocrats, financiers to find loopholes, get perks and benefits by virtue of their position, while the poor sit and work their asses off to raise more little earners, to keep this country alive.

If it takes longer for a woman who raises the future of this country to pay her loan back, and the result of this is that she is paying more in total than her male counterpart, or her female childless counterpart, this needs to be balanced. I don't care how it is done, that is not for me to solve, I am not the person sat in an ivory tower reaping rewards for my hypocratic policies and decisions.

But something along the lines of...suspend interest on those mothers with children under the age of 5 who work less than 30 hours per week. Or something. It is not rocket science. The person is not having their loan wiped. But is being given a helping hand.

lockets · 31/05/2009 20:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

pavlovthecat · 31/05/2009 20:40

(hypocritic, clearly, nothing to do with medicine)

scottishmummy · 31/05/2009 20:41

i am missing nothing,whatsoever.i dont consider it a legitimate shared debt

however others may do so.

how other people divvy up their money is personal,and as a couple you need to have that discussion.what falls under the remit of shared

as i have said we dont have any shared money.at all

i earn my own money
boyfriend earns his

separate individual accounts
one joint account for nursery,mortgage,bills etc

scienceteacher · 31/05/2009 20:41

If you have borrowed money, it is only fair to pay it back with interest. Pregnancy is a choice, and if you couldn't afford both your pregnancy and your loan, you should have waited to start a family. Higher education should only be subsidised by the state if it makes returns.

As a member of a family unit, you shouldn't really view your husband's loan any differently from yours. Both need to be paid off according to the schedule you signed up to.

hercules1 · 31/05/2009 20:42

Those mothers who work outside the home are also raising the future generation.

Ronaldinhio · 31/05/2009 20:43

Maybe an interest break for the period when your children are aged 0-5 if you are a sahm.

I don't see why that should be a problem

howtotellmum · 31/05/2009 20:44

pavlov- absolutely NOT!

You seem to forget that for every woman who chooses not to work 30 hrs or more a week in order to gain the benefits you imagine, there will be plenty of other women who HAVE to work full time and who are subsidising those who don't through their taxes.

Having children is a choice. It's not the 1900s when you had no choice over when to have kids, or how many.

If you want kids and want a job, and have a loan to pay back, it is not rocket science to understand it is going to take longer and cost you a bit more.

How can women want equality yet still want to be treated differently to men? And if you plan was tobe put into practice, what about men who stay at home - would their loans be frozen etc?

Nope- daft idea.

SoupDragon · 31/05/2009 20:44

You are missing something Scottishmummy. No, it is not a shared debt but when the mother stays at home caring for the children and the father works, his income is shared income and thus should be used to pay the debts of both parties.

Your situation is different to that of a SAHM because you are working in paid employment.

scottishmummy · 31/05/2009 20:45

httm,the only shared finances we have are related to our mortgage,home contents,child.commitments accrued as a couple

seperate student loans
seperate credit cards
no shared debt

so no i dont adhere to here take me and all the debts i accrued before we meet darling school of finances

howtotellmum · 31/05/2009 20:45

ahhh SM your boyfriend*!
well, in law if you are married the debts are joint.
How you divide up your money is up to you, but legally all debts are joint when married- was reading a feature about it in yesterday's Times re. divorce and separation.