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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not be able to keep my children quiet

36 replies

lazylion · 28/05/2009 16:11

Just got back from a midwife appointment where I got viciously told off by the receptionist for having noisy children. The midwife was running nearly an hour late, there are no toys or books at the clinic and there was no-one else waiting. My DS (aged 2 and 4)started off quiet with drinks & pencils but I can't keep that up for an hour. The noise was them tickling each other and laughing. When I got told off I nearly cried(I am 25 weeks pg)but now am furious. AIBU? and if I'm not BU how do I keep them quiet for an hour? God help me when I'm supposed to keep 3 DCs quiet.

OP posts:

paisleyleaf · 28/05/2009 17:45

" I think the H&S explanation you've been given is just rubbish! It certainly isn't a national decision, simply the decision of your clinic not to offer any toys etc."
Well I thought that too, as the dentist, opticians and A&E have toys.

silverfrog · 28/05/2009 17:52

when I was pregnant with dd2, my midwife was always running late.

by the time I was 20 or so weeks pregnant, she asked me at every appt (I had extra due to hyperemesis issues) whether I didn't think it was better to leave dd1 with someone else

dd1 was 2, actually fairly well behaved (just didn't like waiting for hours with not a lot to do), and autistic - being left with somene else was not an option as she would be hysterical.

the midwife asked because dd1 wanted me to "read" her a book (I had to turn the pages in time to dd1 recitation) while the midwife was talking to me, obv the height of rudeness coming form a SN 2 year old

Original poster

lazylion · 28/05/2009 18:44

You are right Bigpants, I'm off to write a letter. I'll anticipate the H&S argument too, if no toys then they need more tolerance. My midwife is just as bad silverfrog, she asked me if I thought they should be at school (they are just 4 and 2)and pulled faces when they talked. I forgot everything I had meant to ask her. I just realised that I let the student midwife do my blood pressure and measuring too, I have a history of PE and growth problems. I was in a right state today, must go and pull myself together.

OP posts:

Olifin · 28/05/2009 19:33

You'd think that a waiting room for a midwife, HV, paediatrician etc. would be the most logical place in the world to put a few books and toys. Why would it not occur to them that a great many of their patients are going to be accompanied by children and are also fairly likely to have to wait at least a little while for their appointment? Utterly bonkers and stupid.

I'm quite angry on your behalf OP, please complain and let us know how you get on.

traceybath · 28/05/2009 19:40

YANBU.

My dr's surgery has books and toys in the two waiting rooms and a box of toys in each consultation room. In fact DS1 was most upset when i saw the midwife this week because we didn't have to wait so he didn't get to play with the toys.

Midwife also very understanding that i always have super-clingy 17 month old with me to the extent that she lifts him up onto to the examination couch when she checks my tummy.

I take snacks and books but to be honest an hour wait would be pushing it in terms of keeping them occupied and quiet.

So i'd second letter of complaint and suggestions about toy box/books etc.

GrapefruitMoon · 28/05/2009 19:48

At my doctors surgery they always seem to be running late (doctors more than midwives and nurses though). I remember being extremely stressed once when ds1 was at the not being able to sit still stage and the waiting area was basically the hallway with stairs (with no stairgate) and front door out to the street, Again no toys to keep them amused.

I did walk out once when I got fed up waiting and the GP actually phoned me at home to apologise. I know they get emergencies which have to be slotted in but every single day?

Gorionine · 28/05/2009 19:48

I have never so far been at a GP, health center, clinic or even dentist that did NOT have at leat books to entertain children!

YANBU if they cannot see you at your appointement time the least they could do is make the waiting bearable (sp?)!

morningpaper · 28/05/2009 19:51

YAdefinitely NBU

loulabellecelino · 28/05/2009 21:46

If there is a H&S problem with toys, then a telly with kids programs would work, that tends to mesmerise even grown ups I find.
But in reality, that sounds like a common sense issue rather than a health and safety one.
Write them a snotty letter, and then find another Dr's...........

WinkyWinkola · 28/05/2009 21:49

Is the surgery waiting room a library? Is silence required? Since when?

Make sure you make a complaint about this awful receptionist, lazylion.

Pregnant and having to deal with a bored 4 yo and 2 yo in a confined space. My hat goes off to you. I would be going potty. I managed to drag DH to my last scan so he could supervise my two of the same age and he was going bonkers with them even with a bag full of toys.

Fairynufff · 29/05/2009 23:05

I came on here to say 'of course you can keep your kids quiet' but an hour? with nothing for distraction? YANBU. I used to actually lie about a history of 'clicky hips' in our family after the birth of my DC1 because the 'clicky hips' clinic was like one of Dante's levels of hell...hours of waiting with a wriggly newborn and woe betide anyone who went out to breasfeed - you'd miss your slot and have to wait hours again...

My DH was furious but I said I'd rather risk the child having sodding clicky hips than have to go through that again!

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