to be worried DP will "stuff" up my birthday??

[macdoodle]

Newish DP of 6 months things going very well, he is lovely, especially compared to my nasty, selfish abusive XH!

It is my birthday in 2 weeks, I will be 38 , I love birthdays and always make a big deal of other peoples/DC etc. Xh never ever made a fuss of mine, I usually had to choose and buy my own present, and nag remind him to get a card from the DC!!

I have great expectations of DP though, he is usually so kind and generous. He has made the odd comment about my birthday, especially as he wont be around, it is a long distance relationship and he works away 2 weeks a month, but is usually here for a week a month! We were out shopping today and he made a few comments about "getting me a present"!

I wonder now whether my expectations are too high as XH always messed it up, and will be crushingly disappointed
If he doesn't give me present/card before he goes on Sunday then it seems unlikely I will get anything before/for my birthday....I guess he could get something delivered but he isn't that organised TBH, very laid back/last minute type!

Oh bugger I am overthinking this aren't I, I know I am.........and its not that I am being greedy etc, I dont care what it is but a thoughtful card and small gift picked out and bought by him would mean the absolute world to me Only 2 weeks to wait and see then, am already disappointed I wont see him on my birthday or for over a week after!

Message withdrawn

I think you're setting yourself up for disappointment here. It's only a birthday.

DO you know (ie have you witnessed) how he behaves WRT other adults' birthdays, including his own? Some people think birthdays are a big deal, others simply don't, for adults. If he is used to adult birthdays being an Occasion with special meals, lots of gifts etc then you will probably get the same, but if he is accustomed to not much more than a cheap card and maybe a night out, if that, then you might be disappointed in a way which might be a bit harsh on him.
Does he know that you are in the camp of people to whom birthdays matter? If not, then you need to tell him.

While I don't give a fig for birthdays myself (and may have alienated folk because of it) I see how important this is to you, OP. I see that it matters to you that your DP is excited about birthdays - or at least happy to indulge you - and I hope it works out for you. But I do think you're over-thinking it a bit, he won't love you any more if Interflora (other online flowershops exist) deliver on time, or any less if they're late.

The substance of the man is more important than grandiose gestures in the long term - but I also recognise the value of small gestures.

I hope it all works out well for you, but please, if you know he's the laid-back type, don't be too upset if there's no grand gesture for your birthday.

On the other hand, be over-joyed if there is!

woah, I don't think my DD is as excited about her own birthday as you are! Chill sister! x

Ach, I can see why OP is excited, and I really do hope her new DP will step up to the mark. I just don't want to see her disappointed if he's Not Perfect, iykwim.

Make sure he arranges a special meal or the like for you when you're next together in honour of your birthday