To wonder why I have to teach my mobile phone 'bitches'

[theDreadPirateRoberts]

When texting to check the sex of some dogs coming to a barbecue?

And why 'fuck' isn't on there, but 'wtf' is?

And why 'shiv' is there - which I find is a much more worrying word than 'shit'...

Umm... what does "shiv" mean?

Suddenly I feel like I'm 9 and in the playground again...

I've had to teach my phone "crap" and "bollocks". I feel like a bad influence.

Shiv is the term for a homemade weapon/knife in prison - very not good.

I've also had to teach my phone crap, arse etc, but am impressed that I hadn't used bitch in any non-veterinary connection [smug]

But I also had to teach it 'crikey', 'blimey' and 'hurrah', so I'm obviously just giving it a broad education

Two of my friends had to teach me how to use predictive text, and then had to show me how to teach the phone rude words - df1 needed rude words on her phone for when she's discussing her ex.

Anyhow - I had a fun time teaching the phone all sorts of sweary words, and found I had a screen full of text - and it seemed a pity to waste it - so I sent it to dh.....

..He thought my phone had been stolen and rang me at home to check.

Of course my friends were laughing like drains! Bitches.

dp had to teach his phone "cuddle" lol
it wanted to put buffle.

mine never wants to write "is" it puts "hr" instead, which is really annoying

Feel very dull that I've taught mine the main supermarket names. Dear gods have I nothing better to text about

I alway find it strange thatmy phone picks 'Nun' over 'Mum' when using predictive text. Do you not htink that the word Mum is used a lot more commonly than Nun?
the rpedictive text on my phone guesed my DD'd name as Freak before i taught it her name. I thought that was quite funny.

Both my BILs come up as 'oil' first

blametheparents - it's because Americans say "Mom". Mum is a non-word.

And yes, I've taught mine Sainsburys, Waitrose, fucking and bollocks. So equally sad, but with extra swearing.

I've also taught it 'cuunting fuckery' but I thought I'd pretend to have shame

I've taught mine 'janey mac' and 'shite' and 'yer' as in 'yer man' I must be more Oirish in my texing than i am in RL speech.

But what's 'janey mac'?

Thanks, hassled, that makes sense

Anyone taught their mobile phone fanjo, or mooncup?

quickdraw - DD tells me that she can't understand her Irish cousin's MSN text-speak. And DD knows her txt-spk. Is there a PhD waiting to be written in there somewhere? Is dialect changing English through the medium of text-speak?

janey mac = blimey.

I have sent a text about making a sandabstle. I did wonder if it should be 2 words or needed a hyphen but when my phone didn't go 'beep' and ask me to spell the word I assumed it had got it. I have now taught it sandcastle.

Does anyone know what a sandabstle is?

I can understand shiv working because the phone doesn't know you're stopping after 4 letters, it would predict you were starting to write shiver (or similar).

'tis frustrating. Mine won't learn twat

mine knew shit but not nappy

mine still does not understand 'yay', nor 'xray', nor my name

and then it writes in 'me' every time instead of 'of'

my texts rarely make sense

Oh I remember having to teach mine nappy - bizarre. So glad I don't have to use it now

mine automatically adds an exclamation mark to yay, and a question mark to coffee...

Mine seems to have decided to write we're as we,re. Every time. Driving me crazy... [pedant]

stop showing off flame, tis so not attractive.

to Flame

I probably pressed some random store button. It also capitalises Mumsnet for some reason

I do like the fact that it thinks that flshnm etc is a perfectly reasonable word, but freaks out halfway through Bronwyn.