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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be worried about getting a newborn and a toddler in a car that is 80ft away from the house?

68 replies

loveigglypiggly · 17/05/2009 09:42

I just don't know how I will get a new born and a 24 month old in the car in the rain when our parking in 80ft away at the bottom of the garden. I want to move but DH thinks I have lost the plot???!! AIBU......and more to the point how would you do if safely???? Bags, babies, rain AH!!!!

OP posts:

Habbibu · 17/05/2009 11:27

It's interesting how people do feel they have to carry babies in car seats a lot - I thought so too, but stopped sharpish when dd turned out to be 10lb 11oz, and our car seat was Very Heavy. Car seat lived in the car after a week or so!

stuffitlllama · 17/05/2009 11:30

oh yes very doable

but one day you will be flamed on here by someone who sees you leave the children in the car while you throw the shopping in the house

violethill · 17/05/2009 11:32

I think the point here is that the worrying is far worse than the reality.

When you have to do something, you find a way. When I got home from hospital with dc3, with my 14 month old and 3 year old at home, I wondered how I'd ever get dressed in the morning never mind out of the house!

Within a week I was getting everyone up and walking to playgroup by 9 o'cock, and later that year I was back at work so we were all out by 8 o'clock!

Don't worry - you'll find a way!

Original poster

loveigglypiggly · 17/05/2009 11:40

THANKYOU ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am being totally serious though if anyone wants to come and train me up!

Also need 1:1 on food, trantums, teething, DH not clearing up after himself, choosing the right playgroups, going back to work PT with 2, looking like a tramp..................I'll stop now......

OP posts:

nappyaddict · 17/05/2009 11:44

My friend says this is why she does all her shopping online - no struggling with lots of bags and children from the car!

flamingobingo · 17/05/2009 11:45

You don't need 1:1 - you need to take a deep breath, know that you can do this, and throw yourself in the deep end! It'll take you an hour to leave the house the first few times, then half an hour, and soon enough you'll be so good at it you can get out of the door in no time!

ProfYaffle · 17/05/2009 11:45

Top tip, put toddler in coat with a hood, shelter from rain and handy handle to grab when they try and rub away!

raisingrrrl · 17/05/2009 11:47

Will your dh get paternity leave? If so, try and get all your systems in place while he's there to pick up the slack. My dh only got 4 days, so we hired a post natal doula - if you're really worried about how you're going to cope, would this be an option for you? Do you have any family nearby? If hiring someone isn't an option, maybe you could get in touch with the local colleges to see if they have childcare students who need placements as experience for their course? You can never leave them alone with the children, but it's useful as someone else to talk to in the day and to help with the housework!

Wrt to the play park thing, I must confess to driving to the nearest enclosed space, popping dd in the sling and just releasing ds while I sink onto the nearest bench with a takeout latte or to have a small snooze. But then my ds is very independent - your toddler may want you there with them, in which case the sling is your saviour! We have a Didymos wrap and a pouch sling. The pouch sling is great for small trips and I keep it in the car most of the time, whereas the Didymos is better for round the house - when dd was tiny (she's 12 weeks now) I could wash up, play with ds, hang the washing out etc with her in the sling and pretty much get on with life as normal!

I totally understand how daunting it feels at first, but overthinking it will just make it worse. When you're actually in the situation it will be easier and you will wonder what you worried about!

devotion · 17/05/2009 11:52

i don't even have a car so i think you are mad

if i were you i would just load the pram up with everything you need and push pram to car with kids, if raining - raincover and coats. Forget about umbrellas with prams.

You will be fine, us woman are magical things. When faced with new challenges we adapt and find our own crazy way of doing things. Don't let yourself worry, you will look back at your mumsnet history threads and laugh!

I do that often, always brings a smile to my face to read the things I worried about. I actually sent a thread because I was worried my dd1 had forgotten to say "cat" after she had been saying it for a few weeks.

MoominMymbleandMy · 17/05/2009 11:58

OP, I can appreciate your worries but I do think you're going to laugh at yourself in a few months.

My best tip would be to get a sling for the newborn, a proper one, not something from Mothercare (heaps of advice is available on the Sling Cupboard-May) thread.

With a sling the little one will be snug, cosy and safe, and you will be hands free to chase after the toddler.

Leave the car seats in the car. It's much easier than struggling to fit the baby seat in every journey. Go out with the baby in the sling (you can even get rain covers for them), and the toddler in rain wear and wellies, pop toddler in toddler seat, pop baby out of sling and into baby seat, get in yourself and drive off.

I know it seems daunting but it isn't really.

wotulookinat · 17/05/2009 12:13

Get a car seat for the newborn that has a raincover for it. Carry car seat with baby in it and drag take toddler with you. Strap toddler in car then put baby in and remove cover. Ta-da!

And think yourself lucky that you have an 80ft garden and a car.

cazzybabs · 17/05/2009 12:16

re hte park...it is easy when you have a new born..you juts follow your toddler with your newborn in a sling or buggy same as now...what gets interesting is when you have 2 walking than want to go on different things...but you cope because you do!

Same as the car thing....once you have done it once you can see you are worring over nothing

peanutbutterkid · 17/05/2009 12:25

When the Congestion zone charging in London was being debated, some anti person said:

"What about some poor parent taking their two children to a nursery that is just half a mile inside the Congestion Zone? They'll have to pay the Congestion charge or face parking the car, getting a double buggy out and walking in the rain -- which is clearly impossible."

//Sigh//

Yup, a ten minute walk in the rain, clearly impossible for most people -- especially us parents.

MrsTittleMouse · 17/05/2009 12:39

I agree with everyone else that a sling/carrier for the baby and reins for the toddler are the way to go. Or even put the baby in the buggy if you are struggling physically post-natally (as I was). It's not necessarily much fun, and I can see why you're concerned, but juggling them does get easier with pracise.

StarlightMcKenzie · 17/05/2009 13:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

nappyaddict · 17/05/2009 13:11

It's the length of a swimming pool it's hard far so I think YABU.

AitchTwoOh · 17/05/2009 13:19

agree TOTALLY with those who suggested a sling. we have off-street parking and can park aaages away from the house so you just have to put the sling on under your jacket, gather yourself, bags and toddler and at the last minute the baby. then find car, deal with toddler first then bags then baby. as baby gets older it will be more practical to leave toddler on pavement (or in your case just in their own garden ) and deal with baby first.

i keep the sling on while driving so i can do the same if i'm not parked outside my destination. also put the sling on before getting into the car to go home saves faff when you get there. as for the rain thing, you're bieng a bit weird.

PS slings are particularly great when you have a toddler as it's like there isn't really a baby for a while cos they're so little inconvenience, which makes adjustment easier.

ilovemydogandMrObama · 17/05/2009 13:26

baby in car seat with a raincover.

toddler walks with raincoat/wellies.

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