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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to wonder how the Rachel woman in fFnd Me a Family will ever cope with a challenged child?

21 replies

Dillydaydreamer · 12/05/2009 22:55

She just seemed to cry at everything and just didn't cope with anything. She found a weekend with 1 well behaved boy challenging, granted the goldfish died, but she was clueless. Worrying that she was approved imo.

OP posts:

GypsyMoth · 12/05/2009 22:57

she was a bit wishy washy wasn't she!?

giantkatestacks · 12/05/2009 22:59

I was frightened by the severity of her hair - am sure this points to control issues

but seriously her house was just so quiet and perfect - I just cant imagine a 6 year old boy living there...

GypsyMoth · 12/05/2009 23:01

lol....the hair!!!! yes!

just can't imagine her dealing with muddy footie boots,ben ten and of course,the little boy is bound to want a dog!!

giantkatestacks · 12/05/2009 23:03

I do wish her all the best though - all of them really - its a hard thing to do - and that panel [shivers]

TheCrackFox · 12/05/2009 23:04

She was very wishy washy. She was quite hopeless about the dead fish thing.

However, you never know, might be the making of her.

Original poster

Dillydaydreamer · 12/05/2009 23:07

I think that was my point really- its a hard thing to do and her motives were genuine enough. I just didn't think she had thought it through properly. To be able to deal with challenges she will face she will need a huge injection of confidence or she will sink. She couldn't deal with a simple (albeit acted) argument without feeling rejected

OP posts:

Fimbo · 12/05/2009 23:08

My friend phoned half way through it [grrr], did she have to go before 2 panels to be approved like last night's couple?

GypsyMoth · 12/05/2009 23:09

well,in at the deep end.....she'll prob do just fine tho

Original poster

Dillydaydreamer · 12/05/2009 23:09

Definately wishy washy. Children without issues need boundries and rules, with issues such as these children have its essential but I didn't get the impression she was capable at all.

OP posts:

Original poster

Dillydaydreamer · 12/05/2009 23:10

Yes and I was totally they did approve her. Worrying!

OP posts:

brimfull · 12/05/2009 23:13

I do think she had thought it through properly,she had spent 2 yrs going through that process.

Dealing with kids when you have zilch experience is bloody hard..not everyone has a natural instant ability and I think adoptive paretns must be under huge pressure to be instant perfect parents whilst we all get a nice gradual slide into those temper tantrums of older children.

I think it'll be the making of her and hopefully the child will tell her that her hair is ridiculous and she'll chuck out the rollers.

GypsyMoth · 12/05/2009 23:19

it was filmed a while back.....maybe rachel is a mumsnetter by now!!

RumourOfAHurricane · 12/05/2009 23:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Fimbo · 12/05/2009 23:34

Tiffany - she is not getting Simon until the start of this year's school summer holidays

kidowner · 12/05/2009 23:36

I don't think they waited for the tank water to reach room temperature which would explain why the fish died (from shock).

I don't understand why she didn't suggest they go out and get another one.

The controlled behaviour in that classroom in no way mimics real life.

Oh what a rude awakening awaits.

But I wish her well and wish I could adopt (dh doesn't want to).

GypsyMoth · 12/05/2009 23:36

she might be around tho,preparing! i hope so.

chegirl · 13/05/2009 15:51

I think she will be ok. I think she will possibly cope better than the last couple.

She HAS to be commited to get through the process and she must have had it pretty much drummed into her that the child she is matched with will be 'challenging'.

Social services do not sugar coat it. They ram home the message that all kids in care are likely to be 'damaged' (I hate that discription and wouldnt use it so ner).

I think lots of the 'hard to place' kids would flourish in a single parent family. They need that one to one attention.

I hope she does really well for that little lad's sake.

maggie61 · 13/05/2009 18:10

I think she had alot to offer , much better than spending his life growing up with many different carers, she will make mistakes don,t we all ? Adoptive parents have so much scutiny , what if we all had to be assessed as parents.
It would be wrong to go out and buy another fish, its not the same , i he needed to go through grieving before thinking about another, as i felt he probably was still grieving for grandad.
just my thoughts anyway.

Now put on the right thread, guess i got on my high horse and got confused.sorry.

MIAonline · 13/05/2009 18:12

Nobody really knows what kind of parent they will make until they have a child, she will adapt as she goes and with her own child she will be different than the boy she 'borrowed' for the weekend.

blueshoes · 13/05/2009 19:04

I would give her a chance. Afterall, a lot of us were clueless before we had a child.

ScummyMummy · 13/05/2009 19:08

I warmed to her as the programme continued, actually. Agree she's in for a shock, but aren't we all when we become parents?

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